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I have a lot of emotions about it...nervous, scared, sad, excited... I'm hoping that is normal?? Lol!! I'm confident that this is the right decision for me and I have a new found hope for the amazing life that will now be ahead of me!! That doesn't remove the fear and uncertainty though. Does that make sense?

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I am Feb 7 in Dallas, Tx. I am nervous, excited and then more nervous. I am proud that I have decided to take back my life. Then some more nervous.

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Feb 3rd!!! I'm really excited but the fear of the unknown is whats driving me crazy!!

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That's my fear too... between hair loss, nausea, and flat lining. I'm pretty much losing my mind. I keep reminding myself that I work in a hospital and just my floor alone I can get 7 post ops. People have surgery all the time... so it's a little reassuring but I just still drive my self crazy over these thoughts!

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7 post ops per day**

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Another thing is looking back at the negative things about being fat... and it completely outweighs my fears. I mean really... not dating, going out with friends, getting a better job, not fitting into my really expensive super cute clothes with tags on them... I don't even do my hair or makeup anymore cause I don't feel beautiful like I use to. I put 70 pounds on in a year, I have PCOS and I'm pre diabetic and all of my doctors have told me do something now or things will get worse. What really made me open my eyes to how bad things got was not being able to lift my leg over the motorcycle... that crushed me. The little things that all add up, and finnally made me realise it's time for change... don't be scared we are in this together... ill just going in a few days before you :) so I will let you know everything girl!!!!

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