wanted to show yall my get well buddy.

[Lou:) 110]

Wow I dont see why guys have to be such asses

I know what you mean by getting nervous from the barking. My dogs do not bark... ever, but sometimes if my husband has to work the night shift, the will all get up and growl at the bedroom door. It makes me think someone is in the house. I will get up in a hurry in the middle of the night and grab a pistol and shotgun. The I hide behind the chest of drawers were I van see the door and wait for 20 min to see if I hear anything... I have been diagnosed with high anxiety.

[sc_mama4 92]

I have yet to figure out why some men are asses. My ex is a sociopath. I wish I were kidding but he is insane. I've talked to my therapist about him and his actions. Before I left I had a cat that came up to me one day pregnant. I fed her and took care of her outside bc that's how I am. Well I noticed she gave birth so I started feeding her with cream in her dish. Well she came up to eat from where ever she had her babies and my ex took his 45 and shot my cat right in front of me and laughed and said "that's a dead p***y" I had just lost my mom and my dog and I literally sat screaming. He would wound deer just so he could slit their throat. I mean this man is crazy. Which is why I fled like I did. Before I left I slept with all three kids in bed with me. I would tell myself if he's going to kill me he's gonna have to do it with me protecting them all. I would sit and shake constantly. His favorite thing to do was to scream as loud as he could while I was cooking or watching tv and he'd laugh to see me throw up bc it scared me that bad. Finally when I left I just left everything we owned behind and to know how much we went through and to see how blessed we are now is amazing. God really got us out and took care of us in so many ways. Anyway that's why I'm terrified of him finding us but my bf like I said got me a ruger and the anxiety has dropped bc I know my dog would alert me and I would have them shot before they knew it. My kids also have a spot incase its the day and we have a saying they know when they hear that to find their spot bc the firearm is coming out so. Its sad I have to live this way and what's sadder is my ex now lives with a single mom and three daughters and I just pray he doesn't kill her but I can't alert her without putting myself in danger. I won't even ask for child support from him. My bf called him and he agreed to allow adoption if we paid and my bf said he would and he'd ship him the papers. The thing about him is he's the opportunistic kind and lazy. He isn't going to track and follow and work to find me. That's how he operates is on opportunity ..so I do have that in my favor. Anyway I'm rambling sorry.