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alisa345

Thats great that u were able to reconnect and get over the bs. My first marriage was in 99 we split up in December of 99 we tried to work things out for another year but couldn't. He never really trusted me even though our daughter was his. We were both in the navy and i found out i was pregnant three weeks after i left for road island and he left for a 6 month deployment. He always thought i was unfaithful and it always came back and was a fight even though there was nothing to fight about. I

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I'm sorry you had to go through that. Men can be such boneheads! I told my ex when our first daughter was born and me being half Mexican she came out dark. She's darker than me! He's German and looks at our black hair red brown skinned daughter and jokingly asked me if she was his. I looked at his ass and said if I had her with another guy , he would have money and I would not worry about lying to you. It sounds like you are better off without a man who would think that. You are stronger for walking away knowing you never once questioned being mom. Men make themselves look like an ass when they do that.

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Realionship are full of bull sh*t its the ones that have more good times than bs are worth being in and dealing with.

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alisa345

Thats great that u were able to reconnect and get over the bs. My first marriage was in 99 we split up in December of 99 we tried to work things out for another year but couldn't. He never really trusted me even though our daughter was his. We were both in the navy and i found out i was pregnant three weeks after i left for road island and he left for a 6 month deployment. He always thought i was unfaithful and it always came back and was a fight even though there was nothing to fight about. I

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Yea that's hard with the both of you away like that by being in the Navy you probably didn't have enough time to properly work on issues and build up trust again. It took me and my husband years to build the trust we have for eachother, and it was very hard and painful with the thoughts that go through your head thinking about him playing house with someone else, but I realized that him cheating an being with another women was one of my greatest fears and when I got over it I was like I'm still here alive happy with my kids and still able to love an be loved, so if it dies ever happen again I know it won't hurt as bad an I am I stronger person now because of it. Like what they say ( What doesn't kill you makes you stronger) and that's so true..... I hope the best for you Lynn and if you haven't found true love like you deserve I hope you do / if you want to

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alisa345 Thank you for the sweet words..

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What I don't understand is why we the women keep having babies from no good man? I have issues just like everyone else,but I'm not leaving till I have where to go,money,my own place,and most important my bills are 100% paid. When I think my marriage is falling apart I see someone worst. I don't hear "maybelin your beautiful" but you know what I'm good to this man & no other woman is gonna enjoy my furniture oh hell no! it's not material but I put 16+ years into this marriage so let some other whore take my stuff. The day I leave #1 my kids come first all of them then everything in the house except the bedroom set & the TV in the bedroom. I'm even taking my stove. I can leave the fridge. I can buy that again,and I need a damn job. So before hubby gets any idea he is completely F**ck with me. I'm not a stupid woman. I KNOW THE LAW!! I was an assistant pharmacist made almost the same amount as my husband does now so I did make good money. What screw me was not being able to save money. I thought my job will be forever till I lost my job. Soon I'll be working again. No man is gonna make me feel like I need his money. I can make my own & a d**ck I don't need. I have a vibrator.

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Im looking forward to all the attention from men not because i would want to cheat, but because it would make me happy too know that im desirable to the opposite sex. Its scary though because I'm also not 100% confident that I won't leave my husband because I still resent him after finding out that he cheated on me for the entire length of our relationship with this lady he was with before me. It sucks cause we have two young kids age 3 & 1.

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What I don't understand is why we the women keep having babies from no good man? I have issues just like everyone else' date='but I'm not leaving till I have where to go,money,my own place,and most important my bills are 100% paid. When I think my marriage is falling apart I see someone worst. I don't hear "maybelin your beautiful" but you know what I'm good to this man & no other woman is gonna enjoy my furniture oh hell no! it's not material but I put 16+ years into this marriage so let some other whore take my stuff. The day I leave #1 my kids come first all of them then everything in the house except the bedroom set & the TV in the bedroom. I'm even taking my stove. I can leave the fridge. I can buy that again,and I need a damn job. So before hubby gets any idea he is completely F**ck with me. I'm not a stupid woman. I KNOW THE LAW!! I was an assistant pharmacist made almost the same amount as my husband does now so I did make good money. What screw me was not being able to save money. I thought my job will be forever till I lost my job. Soon I'll be working again. No man is gonna make me feel like I need his money. I can make my own & a d**ck I don't need. I have a vibrator.[/quote']

I think all women need a dumb move light that goes off when a guy in a week or in 10 years is gonna become a dumb a** that way we never marry then or waste our love and time on them.

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Amen Mami! I stayed until he left. When he did, I didn't beg for him to come back. I moved on! The best thing that came from it were my children. I'm so happy where I'm at. And if I had done anything different, I would not be with him now. Sure he can be an ass at times. But he has taken care of all five of my children and called him his own since my youngest was 6 months old. Everything happens for a reason, and I'm glad I found my reason. Funny thing is, my ex and he get along great. I also regained the friendship I thought I lost with my ex. And I have the best children in the world!

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Amen Mami! I stayed until he left. When he did, I didn't beg for him to come back. I moved on! The best thing that came from it were my children. I'm so happy where I'm at. And if I had done anything different, I would not be with him now. Sure he can be an ass at times. But he has taken care of all five of my children and called him his own since my youngest was 6 months old. Everything happens for a reason, and I'm glad I found my reason. Funny thing is, my ex and he get along great. I also regained the friendship I thought I lost with my ex. And I have the best children in the world!

Too bad it didn't work out. Glad he takes care of all 5 kids.

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Im looking forward to all the attention from men but I'm also not 100% confident that I won't leave my husband because I still resent him after finding out that he cheated on me for the entire length of our relationship with this lady he was with before me. It sucks cause we have two young kids age 3 & 1.

If that is the case, what you are saying is understandable! But what makes what you are saying okay, is you said you would leave him. Not perpetuate the problem by playing him. The only thing that makes me sad is you didn't think yourself good enough to do it before. You are a beautiful woman and thick or thin you can do better! :')

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The ex husband now takes them on weekend and that began a year ago. It feels amazing to have a little me time. Though when they are gone if the bf and I don't go out for a drive, I'm sleeping...lol the bf has no children of his own but he says everyday, these kids are his. He jokes that people think he's nuts when he's in public calling five white kids his. He's black and he says the only one who can pass for his is my oldest little dark one. The rest are blonde hair and blue or green eyes. But genes do not a family make.

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I believe in once a cheater always a cheater,but also you can forgive a person,but if they cheated on you the entire course of the marriage/relationship. Was it or it is worth staying with some one like that? He has no respect & doesn't value you as a woman.

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He does value me. Its just hard to forget. I haven't had the surgery yet. I'm still debating on which surgery to get. I heard that a lot of marriages end after wls so I'm kinda wondering what will happen in the future.

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Yeah it was the entire time and he lead a double life. In a way I feel cheated out of the life I could have been living. We will have been together for 10 years in September. I've been with him and only him since I was 18. I'm turning 28 in August. Our 6 yr wedding anniversary is on the 22nd of this month. That day is going to be hard I just know. I have babies with him that I stay home and take care of and I also don't work. It's just so hard I go through these cycles of wanting to leave him then getting scared too. The weird thing is that I also still love him. :(

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Im looking forward to all the attention from men not because i would want to cheat' date=' but because it would make me happy too know that im desirable to the opposite sex. Its scary though because I'm also not 100% confident that I won't leave my husband because I still resent him after finding out that he cheated on me for the entire length of our relationship with this lady he was with before me. It sucks cause we have two young kids age 3 & 1.[/quote']

Wow Nikki

I really hope survey helps you with being happy is all espects of you life. That was much more than a quicky - it was another full telationship - so I would not think you would easily get over it. We r all here to help each other so just let it all!!

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