Scared this might be a mistake

[christy38 17]

Hey everyone Im so close to the end of the wls process and I'm having doubts once again. I was thinking that I've never really given myself a chance to lose weight on my own. Like. I've cut down on eating the wrong foods and exercised here and there but I've really haven't gone on a "real" diet and I'm worried if I'm making a bad decision on having WLS. They always say the you wls is the last resort if you have tried numerous diets before and they haven't worked but I feel like being 5'3 weighing 320 will be very hard to lose on my own. Any advice ?

[jandseakin 96]

Everyone has to decide for themself, but here is my input. I am 64. In my 30's I lost 76 pounds and reached goal with WW. In my 40's I lost 115 pounds and neared goal with a hospital-supervised liquid diet. Dozens of other times I would lose 30 - 50 pounds on various progras. I was even a WW leader for a number of years. But I am a food addict and every time I gained it all back plus more. When I turned 60 I reached 300 pounds for the first time. I decided I want to live an be healthy and the only way to do this is to get this weight off for good. I was sleeved June 6 and for the first time I am hopeful and encouraged for the future y sleeve is only a tool I know, but it won't allow me to binge, and it makes me only want to eat Protein and other healthy food. My only regret: I waited 30 years to do this (of course it wasn't an option when I was young) But you have the opportunity to change your life forever! Whatever you decide, get the weight off, keep it off, nd start living! Best wishes to you!

[gamergirl 4,609]

My only advice to you is be very sure before you proceed. It's an irreversible procedure with a lot of adjustment and head-work that needs to happen. You have to approach life and food very differently for the rest of your life. If you're not sure, then try it on your own and see how well it works before you have the surgery. There's no rush to do this in a sense, and best to go into it with conviction when/if you do.

[Jerzygurl 372]

Yeah, don't do anything you're not sure of... that is my only advice.

As for me, I've tried pretty much everything, I've lost a great deal of weight on my own and over the years, only to regain it plus some. This is not just about the weight for me, it's about my health and my history and medical issues. I've done my research, discussed it with several doctors, my oncologist, gynecologist, the WL surgeon and my PCP..and I've arrived at the same conclusion they have... it's a postive step in the right direction.. For Me.

You have to decide if you're truly ready to do it. I know, I am.

Best wishes.

[PrettyLilButterfly 124]

I think in this case darling, you need to listen to your heart. What is it you are truly afraid of that's causing this second thought?

Do you feel you are doing the right thing? or do you feel you want to try this on your own? either way, it's a lifestyle change, NOT a diet... it's going to effect the rest of your life either way.

Have you gone to support groups at the clinic you are having this done at? Do you have a good support system at home?

You need to talk to your doctor about your concerns. Don't feel pressured to do a WLS because others have or because others want you to.

[MzO 8]

You know, afterwards I thought the same thing. I was so sure, not a hesitation in mind when I had the surgery on 8-14-3, it was going through the first phase that made me doubt myself. But if there are health issues, this is best. True it's irreversible but I've been told you can still stretch your sleeve out if you don't eat according. I've even read about people that have stretched their stomachs some 5 to 7 yrs later. Not gaining a tremendous amount of weight but still gaining weight back. I agree with Gamergirl, its your body and your choice. Choose wisely....

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[Recycled 2,182]

The doubt itself would be the first reg flag. Is it fear of the surgery and the pain or discomfort ? Or is it fear of possible long term complications? You'll get over the pain and discomfort, but the risk of irreversible complications is real and should not be taken lightly. Getting ready is not getting surgery and that's why your questioning it as it gets close. And you should. If the weight is not life threatening at this point and you feel you haven't tried hard enough to lose without the surgery......then try. Be sure. Try to follow the same diet and lifestyle changes to lose that you would if you had the surgery with the mindset that the surgery is your only other option. Maybe take in a couple more sessions with the therapist. By all means, be sure and if you choose the surgery, "own it". You will be the one living with it the rest of your life, so don't let anyone else make that decision for you.

[feedyoureye 3,087]

Statistics say that you are more likely to keep more of the weight off with surgery. It is just a tool, and a lot of work goes into using the tool, for the rest of your life. This would also be true with changing your eating habits with a new diet without the sleeve. Do you feel like you are caving in or taking the easy way out or doing the drastic thing by getting the sleeve? Do talk to your surgeon, therapist and nutritionist again, and discuss this with them if you have the chance. Best of luck to you and whatever decision you make.

[Pookeyism 1,143]

That is a hard call, when you say that "I've never really given myself a chance to lose weight on my own.", what do you mean?

Do you mean it was never really successful? Or that your apetite or something never let you get far? Something else? I would define that statement for yourself and be sure you understand your internal struggles very well. Not saying don't do it - be very aware what is going on if you are saying you have never attempted to really control your food.

You should consider (discuss with a therapist, maybe?), in my opionion (just my opinion), probably undergo a diet for awhile - keep a surgery date, but give yourself long ehough that if issues really begin to surface you can reconsider. It isn't like you will not be losing weight in the meantime.

I am NOT suggesting you have to try and fail, not even once! Only that you give yourself time to make sure you can see what is in store for you, and that you have dealt with as much 'head' stuff pre-op as possible.

[christy38 17]

Hi everyone, thanks so much for all your advice. Im 38 years old and pretty much been overweight/obese my entire life. When I said I haven't given myself a chance I meant I really haven't gone on a strict diet ever. I've cut out junk food and soda and was going to the gym 3 times per week and lost 15-20 pounds but with pms and stress I would end up gaining the weight back. I was 260 pounds in 2000 and now I'm at 320-324 . I don't know if my bodies against me losing weight. I'm so confused. I just felt that if I have been overweight/obese my entire life that I should just get the surgery and that's it but now that I'm close to the end of the whole process , I'm having second thoughts and scared. I feel losing 85 percent of my stomach forever is a lot and not knowing what can happen after surgery scares me a lot. It's like there's no guaranty that my body will accept the changes. my mom keeps asking me if I called the hospital and if I've gotten a surgery date and I don't know what to say. I know I should let anyone force me into having surgery but my family has backed me up 100 percent because they want to see me happy. I also feel that if I decide on jot getting surgery right this minute that the whole process , co pays , testing etc was a waist of time. I'm just a mess

[Recycled 2,182]

Ok look Christy, most insurance companies will allow you to use your pre-op process for a period of time after it's completed. So Relax. Now, forget all the other stuff I said except the part about the therapist. Make some more appointments and talk it all out. Do not make a rushed decision. Calm down. You'll find your answers.

[cindymg 629]

Christy: do not proceed if you are not 100% convinced that this is the best path for YOU! Not your family.

That said, I wasted 40 years of my life on every diet program, dangerous diet pills, diet books, gym memberships, etc. I calculated once that I lost and gained 2,000 lbs in that 40 years. Oh yeah, and gave myself a nasty case of out of control diabetes, high blood pressure, and heart disease. For me, the sleeve offered me a way out of all that. I am 3.5 months post op, down 52 lbs, medical problems resolved, and I feel fantastic! I have a chance at life, of seeing my 60s, 70s, 80s. And with all of my limbs intact.

Whatever you do, don't waste the next 20-30 years of your life gaining and losing the same pounds over and over. Get past the fear of change and move on with your life -- not carrying the extra weight ( and the weight of the health problems, and emotional toll that go with it).

Good luck!

[angry 158]

im not sure exactly what your concern was but honestly one of my biggest concerns were things that convinced me i needed to get the surgery, like can i eat ____ (insert your food of choice here). me and food had a real serious relationship, and while i had dated diets and exercise, i always found my way back to food in the long run. since i had to eat to live, i could never fully end our relationship, but since getting the sleeve i feel like it is so much less dysfunctional.