What to do with the negAtive nellies and Nay sayers

[catobird1225 13]

I'm so sick of people trying to talk me out of having this surgery! Any suggestions???

[Gojogo 55]

I have told everyone that I'm doing this as it seemed easier than avoiding! I have had quite a bit of negativity! how I deal with it is to say "I have done my research and know 100% this is right for me". Speak with conviction and see how those doubters become quite. Some are only trying to look out for us and others have no idea what this op is all about. At the end of the day it's your decision and you have made for good reason :-)

[swizzly 901]

I just didn't tell anyone cos I don't need a bunch of "helpful opinions" and "good advice" LOL. I just wouldn't argue with anyone about it, it's really no one's business but your own. You certainly don't owe them an explanation and you don't have to convince them about your rationale. If it were me in your situation, I would just nod and smile and change the subject asap.

[RJ'S/beginning 5,357]

The people who are trying to stop you are uneducated about the sleeve and how it can improve your life.....They are also worried about the what ifs.....

Some are just scared you are going to look better then them.....oops...women for ya!

I only told a few people the real story about my surgery...others think I had a scar repaired on the lining of my stomach...Even seasoned nurses have swallowed that one..Can't believe it but it is true...

So they realize that my stomach must be smaller so I lost some weight....No one questions me about it at all..

I really did not lie, I just skipped the first part of this journey...

This is your life, your body, your future....You are in control...No one really knows what you have been through to get here......

It takes a lot of courage to come to this as it is not for the faint of heart...

Go get em girl!!!!!!

[ribearty 544]

You can thank them for their opinion, but tell them you are making the best choice for you. If they continue to disagree or argue, say, "we'll agree to disagree on this matter and it is no longer open for discussion."

[JoiaRox 430]

I'm very open about my surgery - even on Facebook (you know, where my "friends" are not necessarily all people I'm close to). I was lucky to be born with the gene that doesn't care what people think about me or my choices. Negative nellies can bite me, because this was MY choice. I did the research, I thoroughly thought this out, I got all of my questions answered, etc. - and I'm now 2 months out and doing well!

Essentially, those negative people can either find the exit door and excuse themselves from your life, or they can hold on to their own anxiety until they see you're doing fine. Either way, the biggest piece of advice I have is NOT to let them get to you! Who cares what other people think?!

[Cajunlady12 49]

I told my step mom and sister yesterday that I have been approved for the surgery. Surprisingly my sister did not say anything one way or the other, however, my step mom tried to talk me out of this again. My dad and step mom have tried everything from saying they are scared for me to trying to use a guilt trip on me. I finally told my step mom yesterday that I am doing this for me and this is something that I want to do. She got quiet but I could she is stil not in favor of the surgery. I have a very good friend that says the people in the small town where my dad lives are jealous of me and are afraid I will become skinny and healthy. I happen to agree with her.

[SerendipityHappens 1,594]

A simple.. "yes, it sounds like you aren't comfortable with the risks/stigma of the surgery, I can certainly sympathize with that.. Good thing you don't need/aren't getting it then! Personally I've assessed the risks of surgery and done what I can to mitigate them and I'm unconcerned with what others will think of my personal health decision."

[loveelaura 52]

That's what I'm afraid of. I've only told my parents and twin sister and that's all I'm going to tell beforehand at least. I started with all the morbities// how shorter my life would be if I stay morbidly obese, the diseases I'll get, etc. I talked about the stats and explained the surgery fully. They're all "on board " but are all definitely nervous for me. I'm not going until January bc I want to educate them and myself more as well as get into a routine before surgery. A self imposed diet and exercise plan haha

Sent from my iPhone using VST

[tigerbelle 328]

when I just saw the topic heading....and before I even read your actual post....my simple answer was "nothing"....you owe no one an explanation or justification

[kw2walker 211]

I'm very open about my surgery - even on Facebook (you know' date=' where my "friends" are not necessarily all people I'm close to). I was lucky to be born with the gene that doesn't care what people think about me or my choices. Negative nellies can bite me, because this was MY choice. I did the research, I thoroughly thought this out, I got all of my questions answered, etc. - and I'm now 2 months out and doing well!

Essentially, those negative people can either find the exit door and excuse themselves from your life, or they can hold on to their own anxiety until they see you're doing fine. Either way, the biggest piece of advice I have is NOT to let them get to you! Who cares what other people think?![/quote']

Tell it!

[Roo101769 742]

It is amazing how everyone has an opinion on weight loss surgery. At the same time, a large portion of the population (that is not overweight) will look down on or ridicule those of us who are. It is one of the last acceptable forms of discrimination. I have been extremely fortunate in the fact that everyone I have told about this has been positive and supportive. ( except one person and she is a hateful person in general-lol) I have also shared with my Facebook friends, and I haven't had any negative responses yet. I am sure there are those who worry about it. But the people who know me know the struggles I have faced due to my weight. They all know losing the weight is my best option and if this is how it happens, well so be it. I am very educated on the sleeve and everything that it entails. The whole reason I joined this website was to get "insider information", to hear it from those who really know. Yes, there will be those who are against WLS for no really good reason. You will never be able to change their minds. At the same time do NOT allow them to change yours! If you know this is what is right for you, then follow your heart. It is your body and your life. And as I have said before...I wish all of us a healthy and happy future!

[belladona 153]

My parents tried to discourage it for the safety of my life they love me very much. But at my age they have no say. Well when my mom sees the changes in me when we visit on Sundays she will say you were so right this surgery was for you .. So from your step parents they will probably change their tune when you are ok from surgery with no complications. Take it with a grain of salt.

[Poolguard 55]

The more I think about this, the more I realize that the only people who can give you a valid and valuable opinion on WLS is someone who has had it. Everyone else just does not know. Period. They can list stats and media stories and horror stories all they want, but it is just stories that they have heard to support their position. But honestly, people who care about YOU and are true friends will understand this choice and support you no matter what. I mean... if you were to tell the same people you were going on a diet, would they tell you... no, no, no... don't do that... it is dangerous and not support you????? of course not. Surgery is just a medically altered diet.

[FeeIsMe2 508]

My aunt tried to talk me out of it, she actually called me at work so my supporters (my husband and my mom) wouldn't hear her. I listened and then never discussed it with her again.

I decided that it was easier just to not talk to her about it until after I had the WLS. Funny thing is-- now she says it's the best decision I've ever made. Ha!!

Good Luck do what's best for you! It's YOUR body, it's YOUR health, and it's YOUR decision!