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I feel out of control

I keep telling myself I'm going to eat healthier or that I'm going to do low carb and every day I fail. (I'm PRE op, I should be sleeved mid feb) why am I doing this? maybe it's a sub conscious food funeral? I told myself I wasn't going to do that. That I'd at least lose 10 lbs before I pack up for surgery. I'm miserable. The wait is killing me. The unknowing is killing me. Reading horror stories that pop up is killing me. I'm killing me. Sigh

I'll give more details when I'm on my pc later. I'm thumbing it on my phone.

I'm not sure what I want. Been there done tht stories? Encouragement?

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This is not uncommon at all. Most of us had the same final meal thing before surgery. Don't get too down on yourself. You soon will be starting your pre op diet and you will lose during that.

I started my pre-op diet today and I don't know if it was because of the holidays or what, but it was very hard for me to eat totally healthy or start that diet before today. If I recall correctly, it's estimated that we should lose between 10-15lbs on a 2 week pre-op diet, but the key is to not gain more before then (tricky, I know). What I am trying to say is that even if you don't start dieting until 2 weeks pre-op, if you can just maintain your weight until then, you should still have a net loss. Good luck!

It is a very emotional time right now. For me, this was one of the biggest decisions of my life right up there with marriage and having children. Perhaps even bigger as it is a permanent, life-long change. I did not take it lightly.

I was fortunate, though, that from decision to surgery was about a month and I had a two week pre-op diet, eating a lean-and-green diet. shake for breakfast/lunch and a salad with lean Protein for dinner. Snacks were limited to another shake. The two weeks prior to the pre-op diet was basically a food funeral. Going to favorite restaurants and gorging down. The first two days of pre-op diet I cheated a bit having a slice of pizza and some of my daughter's birthday cake. But after that, I hunkered down and got serious about the journey I was embarking on. I had made a decision to change my life and I wasn't going to let myself get in the way.

You can do this, too. Just try to stay focused on the end goal and when the pre-op diet starts, follow it closely. Get the funerals out of the way now and don't beat yourself up over it. I'm guessing we all have our personal issues with food, but if you are willing to address them and are determined to conquer them, you will do great.

In my opinion, the pre-op diet is the hardest part of this journey. Knowing I was about to make a life long change made it even harder to resist to the food funerals.. I kept saying really? I have to diet now when it wont be too long I will not be able to eat? It was a mental battle.. I said goodbye to some of my favorite foods and then got busy.. I focused on this was to shrink the liver which is a neccessary part of a safe surgery.. Once I did that I got better at following the diet. Good Luck with all f this. I regret nothing except not doing it many years earlier.

Pull it together Amy! You want this so badly that you're going to fly to MX and pay out of pocket... surely you can do what you KNOW needs to be done. If not now, when? You can do this!!!

  • Author
Pull it together Amy! You want this so badly that you're going to fly to MX and pay out of pocket... surely you can do what you KNOW needs to be done. If not now' date=' when? You can do this!!![/quote']

Right on!!! I think that's what I needed to hear!

Still planning in coming back later w more details.

Amy I am right there with you, this is the last month of my 6 month diet monitoring. I diet for 2 weeks then I go back to eating what I want. It has to come to an end though because I should also be sleeved in February. I have met all of my requirements except my 2 hr. nutrition class and to meet with my surgeon. Remember there will be a lot of things that you eat now that you will eventually be able to eat. You might have to modify some of your recipes to make them healthier. You can find a lot of high protein low carb recipes on the Internet, I plan to try some of the recipes out now before surgery. From reading this forum I have learned that a lot of sleevers eat what they want, but in moderation. I am hoping that I lose my sweet tooth, but if not I will have to find some alternatives for what I use to eat. I have waited to long for this surgery and I plan to make the most of the weight loss window. Good luck and I will see you in Feb. on the losers bench.

Right on!!! I think that's what I needed to hear!

Still planning in coming back later w more details.

Whew!! I was a little nervous posting that! Seriously though, this is a significant change in your life. You can't half-ass this one. You're either all-in, or you're out. I like the posts I've seen from you, and I'd really like to see you succeed.

Best,

I keep telling myself I'm going to eat healthier or that I'm going to do low carb and every day I fail. (I'm PRE op' date=' I should be sleeved mid feb) why am I doing this? maybe it's a sub conscious food funeral? I told myself I wasn't going to do that. That I'd at least lose 10 lbs before I pack up for surgery. I'm miserable. The wait is killing me. The unknowing is killing me. Reading horror stories that pop up is killing me. I'm killing me. Sigh

I'll give more details when I'm on my pc later. I'm thumbing it on my phone.

I'm not sure what I want. Been there done tht stories? Encouragement?[/quote']

The ONE, BEST thing I have ever done for myself , aside from getting this surgery, is reading "The Weight Loss Surgery Workbook" by Doreen A. Samelson. http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/1572248998

I am so much like you, I could have written your post. Nerves and fear and doubt and failure, and this book has helped me so much. It teaches you what your thoughts and behaviors around food actually mean, and how to gently teach your body and mind new ways of using food, while educating you about post- surgery diet requirements and how to handle those.

You will have to change your behavior around food or the surgery won't work. It's that important.

  • Author

Whew!! I was a little nervous posting that! Seriously though, this is a significant change in your life. You can't half-ass this one. You're either all-in, or you're out. I like the posts I've seen from you, and I'd really like to see you succeed.

Best,

I hope I didn't give the impression that I was supposed to be doing the pre op diet. I'm not supposed to just yet, I just dont want to gain, and I'd like to lose a bit of water weight so that my pants can fit better.

I still have about 6 weeks until the date I'm praying for, and about 4 until I find out if we are going to have enough $. We should, but stuff happens, you know? I don't know what the future holds. I'm so excited about this, but at the same time, I'm trying NOT to get excited because if something falls through, AGAIN, i'll be heart broken.. again. I posted in may about how I was so upset that finances fell through at the last minute, right as I was getting the papers for my passport. I don't want that to happen again.. those emotions paired with my stir crazy kids being on this holiday break still, and I'm a bit of a mess..

this is what happend today in a nutshell.. lunch was sourkraut and sausage. low carb and sticking to plan. decided I wanted mashd potatoes.. my mashed potatoes were bland because i'm out of sea salt so I wanted butter bread.. (real butter, but still) so instead of just sourkraut and sausag, I had that with mashd taters and 2 pieces of butter bread... s igh.. THEN, I made hot chocolate and doubled the recipe.. (bagoverhead)

whatever, right now is time to move on. moving on.. :)

Im going to do low carb and myfitness pal tomorrow. that's the plan.. thanks for hte support and love, all..

  • Author

The ONE, BEST thing I have ever done for myself , aside from getting this surgery, is reading "The Weight Loss Surgery Workbook" by Doreen A. Samelson. http://www.amazon.co...aw/d/1572248998

I am so much like you, I could have written your post. Nerves and fear and doubt and failure, and this book has helped me so much. It teaches you what your thoughts and behaviors around food actually mean, and how to gently teach your body and mind new ways of using food, while educating you about post- surgery diet requirements and how to handle those.

You will have to change your behavior around food or the surgery won't work. It's that important.

ive been looking for a good read for my kindle.. thanks! I have one on there called "eat it up" by connie stapleton.. it's a good read too.. thanks for the heads up!!

Amy, don't beat yourself up about what you eat pre-surgery. We all have head hunger and real hunger and pre-surgery we have the room in our stomaches to eat it.

Post surgery the head hunger is still hard but its different because we have no where to put the food so we learn over time that food doesn't control us anymore because we have been sleeved.

Do not be hard on yourself especially don't feel embarassed here because we ALL obvious have one thing in common and that is an issue with food consumption.

I pray things work out for you and I look forward to your happy success story!!

Amy I have seen alot of your posts too. Are you a type "A" personality? You need to slloooowww down and take this one day at a time. I believe your are over stressing yourself and I think I have said it before you are going to make yourself sick over it. Stop thinking of what is going to be i.e. post -op, what you are going to eat, how you will feel, what you will do. You need to focus on TODAY and how it goes. One day at a time AMY......................................

  • Author

Less, thank you! You're sweet. :)

Amazon, only occasionally. I've been told I'm a perfectionist about some things. I'll chill. Still thinking about taking a break from the boards to just focus on life, and coming back to announce my booked flight and paid deposit!!!! That is probably what's best. It's hard though, I'm a SAHM and bored. The forums keep my head busy. You're right though. I think I'll delete the app from my phone now. :)

I'll mis you all but I will be back. :)

You know, days like that are just going to happen, I think. You just have to dust yourself off, and do better tomorrow. Or better still, make up for it at dinner. Just have a light dinner, and maybe go for a walk or something. Get the kids out of the house and make them walk around the block with you.

For me, Doc told me at my initial consult in the first week of October that he wanted to see me lose 5-10 lbs in the 3 months of pre-op. I'd accomplish this mostly by cutting out the liquid calories, including milk. Skim milk. MILK?!? Okay fine. Well, then I'm going all in. I set up my food tracker goal to stay under 1800 cal/day. Most days, I'm between 1000 and 1400. Every couple of week though, I'll have a day - a meal - where I just don't give a F and I'm going to enjoy that burger at Five Guys. I skip the fries, but still, that meal wrecks my goal for the day. No biggie though, because on my worst week - Thanks giving week I didn't even bother weighing in, but the week after - I was net zero from two weeks before. No loss. No gain. I could live with that.

One of the reasons I don't care about the occasional Burger day is because I know that after being Sleeved, that won't even be an option. Another reason is because I've lost over 25 lbs in the time the doc wanted 5-10.

I really want to do this. I think it's my best chance at long-term success. If I get denied though, plan B is to just keep doing what I'm doing. My point of this statement? Don't let this goal hinge on something outside of your control, like finances. Get busy.

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