So I ate a large dinner (no sleeve yet) and told h about how I was going to have more self control later on life and he said "that's not self control." It kindof upset me (but not much) because this is the only way I CAN accomplish self control. and I think putting my SELF on that operating table so I can gain control IS self control.

Thoughts?

Yeah my DH took me out to eat a few nights ago to celebrate my graduation, and I seriously over did it. I was so miserable when I was done eating, (you know that overfull feeling) and by the time I went to bed I was up heaving with that horrible acid reflux feeling in my throat. I have lost a few pounds by just making better food choices, but I'm sure I gained them all back after that meal!

So I ate a large dinner (no sleeve yet) and told h about how I was going to have more self control later on life and he said "that's not self control." It kindof upset me (but not much) because this is the only way I CAN accomplish self control. and I think putting my SELF on that operating table so I can gain control IS self control.

Of course it takes self control!!!! You could still eat sweets and treats every few hours when you have been sleeved but you will have to make a conscious decision not too. The sleeve is a tool to aid weight loss but it doesn't do the work for you.

WLS is highly frowned upon across here as it is portrayed as a "quick fix" for fat people. What people don't realise is that its s dam long process to be accepted for the sleeve in the first place (took me 2 years to be accepted) then you have all the mental and physical trauma both before and after surgery. The liquid and purée diet stages are by no means easy. So anybody thinking or saying this is a "quick fix" or thinking that self control is not needed are needing to do some reading or be told the facts. Xxx

I know what you mean. I had the same problem with my husband. I made the mistake of saying how soon I was going to have to start doing better and he said well pretty soon you'll have to you're taking care of that. I tried to explain to him that the surgery Is only a tool to help with it after I get on real food if I want to eat chips and candy and things like that I could put the weight back on it's also in my head and I have to be willing to make the changes in my life. He just thinks oh she's having surgery that's the only way and it has nothing to do with my head

After being on diets since I was 12 I am seriously convinced that after being sleeved for only 90 days that this is the ONLY solution that would have EVER helped me. I look at all the failed attemps and money I spent and most importantly how bad I felt about myself everytime I failed. I finally feel like a normal person now. I don't obsess about food, I don't overeat. I like myself so much more because I am not defeated by food. I am not at goal but this is already a success for me. I feel like an addict who has been freed. I think this went so much deeper than self control. I didn't have control over food, myself, my body, my emotions- I was a slave to my hunger. Now I walk away and put food in it's place- fuel for my body. That's it. Not the key to my life and happiness. I think my food issues were so much deeper than self control, so when I hear people talk about that, I realize those are people who really don't understand what it is like to have this kind problem.

I started going to Overeaters Anonymous a few months before having surgery and it has really helped me identify my eating triggers and make better choices in general. I'm glad that I paired it with the sleeve.

For me, the sleeve is a tool that helps me make better food decisions. I guess some people could call it self control, but I don't know. Here is what I do know.

I can eat about 6 ounces of food at a sitting. I can do this about 6 or 7 times per day. I know that in these times, there are nutrients my body needs in order to function well ... stay alert ... concentrate ... those being Protein, healthy carbs, Calcium, Vitamins, Fiber ... ya know. So, when the rest of the family is eating:

1. sandwiches with Cheetos
   
2. stir fry with rice
   
3. chicken with mashed potatoes and gravy and string Beans
   

I have 6 ounces of space ...

1. I eat the meat and cheese with a cracker or two and a couple Cheetos at the end
   
2. I eat the meat and veggies with sauce, no rice (or just a teaspoon)
   
3. I eat the chicken with a bit of gravy on it and some beans, no potatoes (or just a teaspoon)
   

For me, I do not want to waste the real estate in my stomach on what I consider nutritionally void foods. How much bang for my buck does rice or potatoes give me nutritionally? Not much ... certainly not enough.

I don't know if I call this self control, though. I am just trying to get the most out of what I can get with the space that I've got.

I'm a large athlete. I was in the Army, got out and now I'm in graduate school playing collegiate water polo. The average person on my team eats around 3,000+ to 5,000+ calories a day and we work out at least 3 hours 5 days a week. I've always been overweight, even though I've always worked out. There is NO way that I coud stop my ravenous appetite without this tool. I would work out then be starving after practice. I would eat anything I could get my hands on and sometimes binge eat, and it wasn't necessarily self control, it was my body thinking I needed more than it really did. Last season I was working out 3 hours 5+ days a week and I gained 20 lbs. I cried, a lot. After my sleeve in august and suriving the fall semester work out schedule I'm down 50 lbs. I eat a lot of protein, and don't have room for much else, and I'm still hungry but NOTHING like it was before surgery. It's faint compared to before. And even if I do get really hungry it only takes a little bit to fill me up, where as before I could have done 5 rounds at a buffett and still had room for more. And no one would have said stop because everyone knows how much I work out. This is a tool, but portion control is decieving. Our bodies produce hormones, and all sorts of things to tell us we are full, and if those hormones in our stomach don't trigger, our brain says keep it eating. I love my sleeve, and it has truly changed my life. And I'm extremely thankful and would reccomend it to anyone, and I already have a friend getting hers next month as well.

I used to argue with my ex all the time about what it means to have self control. He would buy a candy bar and put it in the fridge and leave it there. After three or four days I'd EAT it and several days later he'd come looking for his candy bar. He'd tell me I have no self control. I'd explain to him, "on the contrary I had a lot of self control. I thought of that candy bar thousands of times and only ate it once. 99.9% of the time when I thought of eating that candy bar, I didn't do it." Normal people don't understand how much we WANT to eat but don't. The sleeve is just a tool to make us feel more normal so that the self control that we DO have can be sufficient to allow us to meet our goals!

Yes this does require tremendous self control! This is even like a full time job!

But be encouraged , You have already demonstrated plenty of control. With All that you probably have to do to get sleeved requires loads of self control. With all the hoop jumping, such seeing the Nut, attending pre op classes, Surgeon consult, and the psych consult. This all says self Mental and physical tough-ness. The Courage to change in the midst. Versus Diet after diet. Which was doing the same thing expecting a different result. This sleeve surgery is a different thing. A tool.

You are on the road to greater health. But self control is already happening for you. I also realize that some people don't get.

But, press on toward your goal. . Keep your head up.

This is a journey toward better health.

Good luck!

So I ate a large dinner (no sleeve yet) and told h about how I was going to have more self control later on life and he said "that's not self control." It kindof upset me (but not much) because this is the only way I CAN accomplish self control. and I think putting my SELF on that operating table so I can gain control IS self control.

Thoughts?

Life post sleeve takes a lot (maybe more than non-sleeved) of self control. You still need to make healthy food choices, listen to your sleeve when it says you are full, start and stick to an exercise regimen and limit 'slider foods'. The sleeve is a tool only, the self control still comes from you. That is why some people have long term success and some don't. Your husband may or may not understand this, maybe only those who have struggled, will. Best of luck to you.

Thank you all, you're all spot on!

I know this will still be work. I'll let him see for himself when the time comes.

Yes self control is key..I got bad news and I just ate 4 powdered donuts ..I don't know what it is going. To do because I haven't ate this after sleeve...I don't know what my deal is..my aunt in coma..and I did it without thinking..ill probably get sick..I hate that I did this

Yes self control is key..I got bad news and I just ate 4 powdered donuts ..I don't know what it is going. To do because I haven't ate this after sleeve...I don't know what my deal is..my aunt in coma..and I did it without thinking..ill probably get sick..I hate that I did this

Four donuts one time isn't going to sabotage you to the point of no return. Take a deep breath. Walk around. You understood what you did wrong and that's huge.

Hugs to you & your aunt.