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Scared Straight! New Dad/husband, Thinking About Vgs- Please Help!



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No I am having mine done at Saint Frances in Memphis tn... Dr. Weaver

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wow. thank you all so very much! from the bottom of my heavy heart, i can't thank you all enough for taking the time out to help me. i agree, being at my current weight is really dangerous for my health. And i know it's really risky to be this big. probably more of a risk than the surgery, you're correct. what about eating and drinking? does everyone wait 30 minutes before or after a meal to drink something? how small are the portions? can you eat 1/2 a burger etc? how about coffee, soda, beer, or regular alcohol ? can you have any. i know i shouldn't want any of these things, i'm just curious. I am trying to eliminate them all from my diet as we speak, including, chinese food, pizza, all soda (including diet) and chips and ice cream! any additional tips is appreciated. thanks again and God Bless you all !!!

I do whatever my surgeon/nutritionist told me to do. Yes...I stop drinking 30 minutes before I eat, and I wait 30 minutes after I eat to drink again. My surgeon said no alcohol (of any kind), after surgery, so I don't drink anything alcoholic. I was told to significantly limit (or eliminate if possible) simple starches from my diet...so I don't eat pastas, breads, rice, or potatoes (and I don't plan to start eating them again...ever). I was told no carbonated beverages...of any kind..after surgery, and no drinking from a straw....so I don't drink anything carbonated (and won't ever again), and I'll never use a straw again. I was told to eliminate added sugars from my diet, as much as humanly possible....so I don't eat anything sweetened with sugars (including ice creams, syrups, puddings, Desserts, etc). Granted, my surgeon's approach is very conservative (compared to many on this site), but I figure...he has way more experience with this than me....and I'm paying him a LOT of money for his experience....he probably has reasons for all the behavior changes he recommends...right??

So....do whatever your program tells you do to. Take every suggestion seriously. Read as much as you can on the topic of food addiction (I highly recommend "The End of Overeating"), and learn as much as you can about the psychological implications associated with dramatically changing your relationship with food. You are wise to begin making those changes now....it will make your post-op process much easier, if you eliminate "bad" foods from your diet now. Also, get in the habit of using small utensils (bowls, plates, spoons, forks) when you eat, and to taking at least 30 minutes to eat a meal...taking very small bites, and chewing til the bite is liquid in your mouth before you swallow it. Another tip...start tracking everything you consume...now...so that tracking is second-nature to you, by the time you're ready to start tracking after your surgery. (And if you hadn't considered food tracking, it really is a critical tool for managing your weight loss process!) :)

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RxKid- I think everyone is giving you some great advice. So, here's my 2 cents worth: I don't have a nutritionist but, my Dr told me that I can basically have what I want but to chose wisely & eat everything in moderation. As with anyone who is going to make the decision to have surgery, you're going to go thru a lot of different emotions. It's completely natural & you should write down all your questions & concerns & present them to your Dr.. I wish you the best of luck & you should be proud of yourself for being such a great dad to want to take the necessary steps toward living a happier, healthier life...

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I have to say I was a lot like you I had no issues like sugar loos pressure or even sleep apnea no cholesterol problems. But once they got in there they found I had a huge fatty liver that was going to kill me!! This surgery saved my life. Had no idea. So maybe you feel like the weight is not affecting you but you never really know. Good luck!

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I am 29, my son is 5 years old and although my wife works, they couldn't afford everything if something happened to me during surgery.

Going into the surgery I had $500K in life insurance in addition to my work's coverage. I also told my wife that I wanted to be cremated if anything happened and that no matter what happens I love her and this was 100% my decision to do this so whatever happened was my own doing. It's reality and there are serious risks involved. You should be prepared for the worse.

All that being said, I was sleeved on October 10th without any complications. It's the greatest thing I've ever done for myself.

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simply amazing and incredible!!! I don't just 'like' your comments, I "LOVE" all of them. thanks again to all of you. Yes - I am getting my surgery done at Mass.General Hospital in Boston. The Hospital is Ranked #1 in the Nation. Not sure where they rank for weight loss surgeries but I'm sure they're great at it. Yeah I mean, I'm not afraid of missing out on soda or coffee or fast food or anything. I can and will go without, seriously. I just wish I could know I'll be ok and make it out alive without complications. that is why I am trying my absolute best to work on my weight and health now. I pray I will be ok and I will have faith.

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You will be great bud! And everyone on here is amazing! I have found no matter how off the wall your questions/comments/concerns are you have a huge family here that will support you!!! Dig through progress pics on here and keep asking questions, that's what I did and I'm safely and happily on the other side of this surgery!

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Start working on Protein Shakes and learning what food to eat after it will help you feel like you have some control. I stareted at 423 and had surgery 8-14 and now weigh under 330 it will be worth it. I was the healthy fat guy until the last 4 years then $200,000 in dr bills and I decided to fix it. It does work

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You can do this! It is worth it to be healthy for your family...they need you! We are all here to support you, we were all in your shoes not long ago....and it was the best decision I have ever made!

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    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
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    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Still purging all of the larger clothing. This morning, a shirt that I ADORED wearing ended up on top. Hard to let it go, but it was also hard to let go of those habits that also no longer serve my highest good. Onward and upward!
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