My surgery is in 6 days (10/31), so last night I began writing a "Letter to Me" as suggested by my doctor. (Obviously, the purpose is to record the reasons you decided on WLS in case you later have second thoughts or need a bit of motivation to stay on track.)

Writing this letter led me to think about my fears and what I kept returning to was my fear of gaining the weight back. I'm not afraid of the surgery, the pain, or even the drastic changes required in lifestyle and eating choices. I'm not even afraid of not losing weight. I know I'll be successful because I've done it so many times before. What I'm afraid of (we're talking "heart beating out of your chest type fear"), is that I'll gain it all back. (This is certainly exacerbated by the fact that I'm self-pay and having the surgery in the US.)

I'm guessing that I speak for most everyone in their 50's when I say that we've spent much of the past 40 years on one diet or another. And I'm guessing that most of us have had tremendous successes. Those successes are fabulous until they're followed by the inevitable regain, which of course, is followed by doubts and the self-loathing.

I have every intention of following my doctor's orders to a "T", I am optimistic, and frankly excited about this surgery; however, if I'm being truly honest with myself, I'd have to say that in most of my prior weight loss efforts, I had those same feelings. Every single time I was 100% certain that THIS TIME I WILL BE SUCCESSFUL!

Those of you that have fought this battle and are winning (I know it will never be truly "won" and the fight will continue the rest of our lives), what made this experience different? Why did this one succeed when the myriad of other attempts failed? What advice do you have for me? I truly welcome your comments and advice.

Thank you all so much for your advice and encouragement

Hi y'all! Surgery this morning and everything went as planned.

I have NO pain in my abdomen! Zero Zilch Nada !!! I'm also able to drink according to the schedule with no problems. And no nausea, either!! I've been up walking several times and have also been sitting in a chair.

The only thing has been a bit uncomfortable has been gas pain in my left shoulder. Walking and sitting in a chair have already helped.

Hopefully, for those of you that haven't had surgery, I hope this helps!

That's fantastic. I'm so happty for you.

Welcome to the loser's bench!

Congratulations! So happy to hear you are doing so well. Dr. Nicholson will be doing my sleeve December 4. Perhaps you could send me a private note and let me know about your experience. I would really appreciate it if you have the time. Continued good luck in your recovery!

I think if we are honest with ourselves, this is probably everyone's biggest fear. For most of us, this is the end of the road. Everything else has been tried and we failed. I think for me, the support system that is in place is what helps me. I have my family support (my mom was sleeved too), my medical support, and communities like this. I don't tell many people I was sleeved. It isn't anyone's business, but I need to talk about what I'm feeling, my success, my fears. All the other diets, I truly felt alone. This time I have a team of cheerleaders. We can do this together! You're not alone and I believe it is what is going to make the difference.

Your thread really hits home with me. I am one month post op. I have a fear of gaining in the end or that I will miss that opportunity to loose all I can in the beginning. Sometimes I just have a general fear of failing. Argh!

At times like this I just have to shake it off, get active, go for a walk or workout. I am the co-captain of this ship. I am alert, smart and ready to fight for a better life. I have to ignore those old negative tapes. If I start listening again and realize it.... Forgive myself and move on. Finally as a man of faith, I know God is in charge and wants the best for me. I surrender what I need to and trust Him.

You are worth it my friend!

With u on the journey.

Time for a walk now....

What made this more successful for me than anything was that I craved sweets and everyday I had to get something sweet in me or I was mean.....seriously a grouch. Whatever hormone my stomach was producing that made me crave it must have been in high quantities, because once it was gone, the part of my brain that signaled its time for candy turned off immediately. I can still have some, but I stop after one fun size pack if that. Sweets don't interest me anymore, fruits and veggies do. My advice is to exercise...it's doesn't have to be nutty crazy...I do yoga 5-7 days a week and I am trying the couch to 5k app, but I had hurt my hip so that is on the back burner until I can see my doctor. Follow your diet because it allows you to heal. There is a reason we have to take the steps we do for the advancement of diet to allow for proper healing. And no matter what, don't beat yourself up, its ok...we all mess up. When all else fails, doubt sets in, and you feel doom and dread, come here....post...ask questions..rant and rave...cry....someone is here that understands and will listen...and sometimes judge....but isn't that just like being in a family? You have a network of people who need you: 1) because they are just starting their journey and want took know how you got to where you are, 2) because there are people here who are walking the path with you, maybe even had surgery on the same day you did, and they are in your shoes and understand, may even have the same issues and can help you and themselves through it , and 3) lastly, there are people like me...months out who can remember that not so long ago, I was there and it gets better everyday and here's how I handled a certain situation, and there are people here years out that offer wisdom and sage advice to keep up the good fight and never, ever give up because this time it will work. Good luck...we're all here to lend a hand if you need one! I always got one when I asked for one.

Hi y'all! Surgery this morning and everything went as planned.

I have NO pain in my abdomen! Zero Zilch Nada !!! I'm also able to drink according to the schedule with no problems. And no nausea' date=' either!! I've been up walking several times and have also been sitting in a chair.

The only thing has been a bit uncomfortable has been gas pain in my left shoulder. Walking and sitting in a chair have already helped.

Hopefully, for those of you that haven't had surgery, I hope this helps![/quote']

All I can say is you lucky dog! Welcome to the loser's bench!

Im reading all your stories and I feel you ladies however dont doubt your self, you all have made it this far u took it upon yourself to get up and do something about the lives you were living. Have faith in your self , if all else fails pray. I am waiting on my insurance to decided if they want to help change my life. Ive prayed about it and left it with god. Whats meant for you ladies will be. ~B

Hey there! I had my sleeve surgery Dec. 2010. Doing great! You will too. It is a journey

My biggest fear going in was that I would be the person this surgery didn't work for. That it just wouldn't work right from the start. I told my surgeon that my only fear was that he would not take enough of my stomach out. I will tell you that this surgery is not going to keep you from having to do some of the work but the difference is that now you CAN. It takes enormous willpower for us to have dealt with all the diets we have in life. So we are much stronger than we realize!! How many people would be able to keep finding the strength to try again? So you are strong. Now you will have the tool you needed all along to make you successful. Instead of shoveling a long snowy driveway with a spoon..you now have the shovel! You are going to conquer this!!

Thanks to everyone for their kind and thoughtful responses. I so appreciate your willingness to share your own personal experiences!!