I had lots of pizza last night, and not the thin crust kind, either. I feel so horrible (emotionally, not physically), and I can't stop thinking about it!

I avoid keeping junk in my house, because I know that if it is there, I'm going to want to eat it. When going out to eat, it's easier to avoid unhealthy temptations somehow, because I get to eat my own exciting dish as it is.

A few days ago, my boyfriend and I decided to order pizza at home, after ages. I felt like this was alright, since I hadn't had crap food in some time, and I should allow myself something like this once in a while, when I have the craving. I had one slice of thin crust with cheese and olives. I also had the cheese off another slice (hand tossed), along with 2 or 3 small bites of the bread. I felt very satisfied, and there was no guilt.

Yesterday, my boyfriend was having pizza cravings (the pizza from a few days ago was delicious). While I told him it wasn't a good idea, and that I might get tempted, I didn't hold my ground firmly enough, and we went ahead and ordered the pizza.

I did housework and drank loads of Water while he ate it, in hopes that I could ignore the cheesy goodness. In the end, all I could think about was eating it, and how I shouldn't.

It was like I had entered back into my teenage years where my parents did not allow me to eat something, so I kept obsessing about it, and eventually ate it in secret.

I lost the battle and ate the cheese, along with a few bites of the bread. After that slice, I was satisfied. A little guilty. A few hours later, I was still a tad short on Proteins and calories, so I did the same with another slice. Now, I really did feel like that girl with no control. I had healthier options in my house, why did I have to eat the pizza? The guilt and reversion to my childhood had me hiding and munching on a third slice a few hours later. I ate half of it.

I wonder, if I had allowed myself to eat one or two slices originally, without feeling guilty, would the other slices have happened later?

How do you all avoid this situation, when people in the house are eating food that you shouldn't, without feeling like you are on a forced diet?

How do you avoid the guilt and temptation?

In my experience it is all mental, every sunday there is a buffet style lunch at my house, and I just don't eat it. I won't lie, I would love to eat all those yummy carbs, but I know they are not good for me. I tell myself I am going to drop all this awful excess weight and I refuse to let food control me anymore. I tell myself I am the boss of me, not food. It takes time to talk yourself into this mental place, it certainly did not happen overnight for me.

In the mean time, if it is too hard for you to see that food around talk with your boyfriend and explain that you just can't have that kind of food in your house. Or, make your own diet friendly pizza, get some low carb tortilla, or pita bread, and toppings that agree with your sleeve.

Honestly, I say don't beat yourself up over this. At our house, we do pizza every Tuesday night. I believe everything is okay, in moderation. I got this surgery so I could eat like normal people do. And "normal" people eat pizza. They just had better control over the amount they ate than I did. Most meals, I make sure I eat healthy, get in my protein and plenty of vegetables. And, I have no guilt whatsoever when I treat myself. I look forward to our Tuesday night pizza night. And, one slice satisifies me perfectly now, whereas before I would eat around four slices. Goodness, I love my sleeve!

I totally agree with Susan! You are only human.

First of all let me say you are so beautiful. Now pick yourself up, dust yourself off and get back on track. It's ok to treat yourself every now and then so don't feel guilty. I know it's hard but when your boyfriend choose to be unhealthy around you just stay strong, look him right in the face and tell him um um not this time.. Do that a couple of times and he will get the picture.

Susan said it perfectly and I do the same, we got this surgery so we cant and wouldnt be able to eat a whole pizza anymore...one or two slices is what "normal" people do or should eat....Just make sure that you are still getting your protein in and exercise and live life happy with no more regrets

I refuse to see food as "good" or "bad". Food is either Protein or it isn't, in my book. I've eaten a slice of pizza since surgery, and I still had a loss the next day. Granted, it was a small slice, but it was good.

I'm really working on the "eat anything you like in moderation" line. I can have cake, chocolate, Cookies, chicken, tuna, steak, whatever. There is no good or bad. My main goal is to meet my protein and Water requirements, preferably without snacking. Once those are met, if I am truly hungry, I can afford to have a little snack. Usually I choose something more healthy like nuts or a babybel cheese, but sometimes I have an ice cream sandwich or a SF pudding. I even ate a cannolli the other night!

I'm not saying that you shouldn't watch what you eat, but a slice of pizza is not inherently evil. It's FOOD. Most of what you said about the pizza is no big deal. You ate the cheese and meat off the pizza. While it's a little greasy, that is basically protein. You even ate a few bites of the crust. That's not horrible either, because we need some carbs to keep our bodies running. What worries me is that you then reverted to old habits and "snuck" a piece of pizza.

Truthfully, you didn't sneak anything. The only person who matters when you eat is YOU. By hiding, we don't negate the calories in a food, even though lots of us think that way. We only reinforce to ourselves that WE aren't in control, food is in control.

I suggest you make an appt with the psyche counselor who did your evaluation, or another therapist who has experience with bariatric patients. You need to discuss with them what food means to you. For me, and lost of us, it was a comfort when things were bad, then a source of guilt because I gained so much weight from getting my comfort. I'm not saying you're crazy, but you probably need someone to help you change your outlook on food. Once it's not "good" or "bad" anymore, but just food, then it will be easier for you to resist those things that you decide you shouldn't be eating.

BTW, I made pizza for 12 years, so it's not a trigger food for me. I usually order something that I know is healthier (baked chicken wings, no sauce) and use my own low fat dressing. Everyone is different in how foods affect them, but we all have similar issues to work out.

Good luck!! And, sorry for writing a book yet again.

Wow anyone who is still up feeling guilty and typing about it at 2:15 am must be feeling guilty! Girl, it's not like you ate the WHOLE pizza. Just think where you came from. . .from eating the whole pizza to eating a couple of pieces. . . shoot that is really good. . . what do i do when i get the craving? Nothing, i eat my craving. . . my sleeve prevents me from eating the whole thing, but heck, i'll eat my cravings or i'll go crazy and probably hurt myself with overstuffing if i'm not careful. . i went through years of secret eating and hiding food and bingeing. . . not anymore! those days are over and i'm going to live my life. . good luck and live your live and love yourself!

On the practical side consider eating it and then giving the rest away. Your boyfriend can take it to the office, or you can buy it by the slice (personal size)etc. The point is you will save yourself a lot of grief if it is out of the house or in the trash with some nasty stuff on top of it. :-)

I absolutely refuse to live like I am on a diet. That is a huge reason behind why I do not keep track of calories, carbs, Protein. I keep track of nothing. I eat protein first and go from there. And I only do that because I feel better and more energized when I make sure that protein is first.

You cannot beat yourself up for being a normal person enjoying normal food. That is the kind of thing that led many of us to obesity, we obsessed over what we would eat next and then feel guilty for how much we ate and many times eat something else to make us feel better or we would go on some diet, restrict everything we put in our bodies, ignore cravings and then completely go off the deep end. We let food control us and we got fat because of it. It won't do you any good to obsess over food now, just as it didn't before surgery.

For me, I did this surgery to be normal, to restrict how much I ate, not to restrict what I ate. If I wanted something to restrict the kinds of foods I would enjoy the rest of my life I would have gone with the RNY. Many of my RNY friends cannot tolerate half the stuff I eat and well to me, taht is a pretty miserable way to live.

Many of my WLS friends also expect everyone else around them to change and cater to how they eat now, warning you now, this doesn't work and leads everyone to be miserable. One friend in particular doesn't like to come over here because I have a fully stocked pantry and fridge with every kind of treat you can imagine. I have 5 different kinds of ice cream in the freezer right now (2 of which are MINE and only mine lol), I have two huge containers of candy sitting in the open but because I refuse to feel guilt over what I eat or allow food to control me any longer I can keep it all there and have a treat when I feel like it.

You enjoyed it, you got a craving out of the way and just be happy you ate a little instead of a whole pizza

Now just work on the mental side of this surgery, SO much of it is mental and if we can get a handle on it, we will be happy, normal people for the rest of our lives

Oh my goodness, don't feel guilty over that! Smile! This is the joy of having the sleeve. You're no longer on a diet but a life change. I've had pizza several times since my surgery and I did as you did. I eat the toppings and maybe a pinch of bread. I didn't know I was supposed to feel guilty over this. I'm thinking you're not supposed to. I eat cheese a lot! Most of the time straight from the package and cold. In fact, I'm eating little squares of pepperjack cheese right now. It's a good, easy source of protein. As far as when I ate pizza, I didn't gain. I've continued to lose. Don't let things like that get the best of you! If you're not over filling your sleeve and you're not eating all carbs, there's nothing to fret about in my book. Just saying! I think you're doing great and I don't think that was a bad choice. I have a husband and son, and I try to eat the same meals as they do minus most of the carbs....but with that said, I still have a bite of bread or pasta every once in a while. Lift up your chin and keep going! This is a life changing tool....that changes your relationship with food AND diets! No more diets! diets!

GOSH. have you ever sat next to a person that is skinny....I notice that they order an omelette and country fries and they eat about 1/4th of the omelette and a few bites of the potatoes, and throw the rest away. They don't feel quilty about wasting food either. I think that eating a bite of pizza or 2 is not going to hurt you, in fact, you will be alot happier. My struggle right now is taking a bite and waiting 10 minutes between bites. I have only accomplished that 1 to 2 times. I'm always on the go. I eat around 5 bites of food and stop. I pretty much eat protein with some carbs, but I know that I am doing the best that I can. Enjoy and do not deprive yourself or you will want more. Take care and Merry Christmas.......

I refuse to see food as "good" or "bad". Food is either Protein or it isn't, in my book. I've eaten a slice of pizza since surgery, and I still had a loss the next day. Granted, it was a small slice, but it was good.

I'm really working on the "eat anything you like in moderation" line. I can have cake, chocolate, Cookies, chicken, tuna, steak, whatever. There is no good or bad. My main goal is to meet my protein and Water requirements, preferably without snacking. Once those are met, if I am truly hungry, I can afford to have a little snack. Usually I choose something more healthy like nuts or a babybel cheese, but sometimes I have an ice cream sandwich or a SF pudding. I even ate a cannolli the other night!

I'm not saying that you shouldn't watch what you eat, but a slice of pizza is not inherently evil. It's FOOD. Most of what you said about the pizza is no big deal. You ate the cheese and meat off the pizza. While it's a little greasy, that is basically protein. You even ate a few bites of the crust. That's not horrible either, because we need some carbs to keep our bodies running. What worries me is that you then reverted to old habits and "snuck" a piece of pizza.

Truthfully, you didn't sneak anything. The only person who matters when you eat is YOU. By hiding, we don't negate the calories in a food, even though lots of us think that way. We only reinforce to ourselves that WE aren't in control, food is in control.

I suggest you make an appt with the psyche counselor who did your evaluation, or another therapist who has experience with bariatric patients. You need to discuss with them what food means to you. For me, and lost of us, it was a comfort when things were bad, then a source of guilt because I gained so much weight from getting my comfort. I'm not saying you're crazy, but you probably need someone to help you change your outlook on food. Once it's not "good" or "bad" anymore, but just food, then it will be easier for you to resist those things that you decide you shouldn't be eating.

BTW, I made pizza for 12 years, so it's not a trigger food for me. I usually order something that I know is healthier (baked chicken wings, no sauce) and use my own low fat dressing. Everyone is different in how foods affect them, but we all have similar issues to work out.

Good luck!! And, sorry for writing a book yet again.

Well said and I agree 100%.

If you can fit it in, there really is no off limits. If the pizza you had came from a national chain, they have nutrition information on their website. Look up what you had, it will surprise you. They ordered Pizza in at work a few weeks ago and after looking up the nutritional info, I decided for the extra 70 calories over the lunch I was having, WTF. The bummer is it didn't taste as good as I hoped and I think I would have rather had the lunch I brought from home.

You felt weak because you felt deprived. When I order my family pizza, I order a personal pizza made on a wheat wrap. The pizza place near my house make it especially for me. Its excellent. See if you can find a place near you that will do that. I eat 1/2 of it.

Everyone, thank you so much! Firstly, I must apologize for not reading this earlier and consequently replying very late. I had some computer issues, and I'm back on now.

Paola, your self control is amazing! I don't think I could do what you do (or would want to, truthfully), but I am so very impressed. All the best to you!

Susan, thank you for letting me know that. It's good to see people on here living normally, healthily, and happily without feeling deprived.

Sleeve of steel, I remind myself of that all the time!

Sleeved Realtor, thank you for the compliment! I'm working very hard on maintaining my ground when necessary.

Exoticheart, I love your avatar! You're right, I got this surgery so that I could finally feel normal. And for the most part, that has happened.

Lissa, so much wonderful advice! In regards to the food not being labeled as "good" or "bad", your wisdom is genius. Why does no one tell us these things when we are overweight? I'm sure it would help a lot with the guilt. About meeting with the counselor, I really need to. In the last 3 months, I've found several issues I need to work on. One of which is hiding and eating foods which I don't think are good for me. It leads to guilt and overeating. If I had allowed myself that single slice or two, I could have avoided the third that came later, and avoided the guilt.

You're so right.

Thinoneday, how liberating for you! I want to be in that place, and I'm getting there slowly. Thank you!

Longer life, I've found that the BF ends up eating his own food plus mine. Sometimes I can convince him to share with me. He's trying to control himself, as well. It's a work in progress!

Sasicas, you're so right about many aspects of this surgery being mental! I think it's amazing that you can stock your house with goodies. I don't have that self control yet, and don't keep any junk in this house (other than some milk chocolate). I want to be where you are at eventually!

PenPen, I have been on diets since I was 6, and I hate them so much! This surgery is so wonderful, because for the first time I feel a sense of satisfaction. Something I never had before. Earlier, I was always wanting something..a little more. Now, I'm happy with a normal amount. It's a wonderful feeling. I love cheese, and that helps! Do you eat full fat cheeses, or low fat?

Dorrie Robles, people like that always baffled me! I wondered how they could do that, and why they seemed to be satisfied. I on the other hand, would finish my meal and be craving dessert. Now, though, I understand. I feel satisfied. It's amazing. I still find that I occasionally have the tendency to eat something, even if I am satisfied, but that is improving.

LilMissDiva, I've read some of your posts, and you seem very happy with that philosophy. I hope it works for me!

SoCalKurt, you're right! I was surprised that the pizza didn't seem as bad for me as I assumed it was. Even with the 3 slices, I didn't go over my calorie limit for the day. I suppose the unhealthy part is the excessive fats and carbs?

NJmomof2, good idea! I'm going to try that from next time on. That way, I get to eat the same yummy and tempting food, but a healthier version of it.

Thank you, again, every one!