Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

No support from boyfriend and family



Recommended Posts

I understand how you feel! My husband isn't supportive at all. When I started learning about WLS I decided that VSG is what I wanted...what I NEEDED and other people's opinions wouldn't change my mind. When I told my husband that I wanted this surgery all he said was "We're not paying for that, just stop eating and excerscize" Even though I think his issues with this are deeper than the price my heart broke and I cried for days. He doesn't understand how I feel to be OBESE. At this point I'm still trying to come up with a solution to make this happen. My mom was just offered a job and told me that if it works out she'll give me the money without hesitation...She is my only supporter, who understands how it feels to be so overweight. I'll then schedule my surgery and be on my way to Mexico! Keep your chin up and remember you are doin't this for YOU and YOUR HEALTH! :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Glad to hear that other people meet with opposition as I have when I tell them of my plans to get sleeved in Mexico of all places!!! People do not understand that it is very difficult to lose the amount of weight that we need to lose and then keep it off. Alot of people talk about what the complications could be for me, but what about the complications if I don't have the surgery, such as high blood pressure, diabetes, etc. I worked in a nsg home and we have had quite a few people in the 400-500lb range come in lately. They are fairly young and the reason they are there is due to complications of their obesity. This has helped me make my decision to get sleeved. It seems that loved ones act like they want you to lose weight and be healthy, but when you try to they are not really that supportive. Good luck and best wishes to all my fellow sleevers out there.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I understand how you feel! My husband isn't supportive at all. When I started learning about WLS I decided that VSG is what I wanted...what I NEEDED and other people's opinions wouldn't change my mind. When I told my husband that I wanted this surgery all he said was "We're not paying for that, just stop eating and excerscize" Even though I think his issues with this are deeper than the price my heart broke and I cried for days. He doesn't understand how I feel to be OBESE. At this point I'm still trying to come up with a solution to make this happen. My mom was just offered a job and told me that if it works out she'll give me the money without hesitation...She is my only supporter, who understands how it feels to be so overweight. I'll then schedule my surgery and be on my way to Mexico! Keep your chin up and remember you are doin't this for YOU and YOUR HEALTH! :D

I also am having a hard time paying for the surgery but I think I have it all worked out now for November. It will definitely be a sacrafice in some ways but it will be so worth it. I hope things work out for you too financially. And I hope he comes around once he sees how happy you are losing the weight and feeling better.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told my family I was considering WLS. I got some negative feed back so I did it any way without as much as telling them anything else. After the surgery, they all said why didn't you tell us you were having surgery. I said if you had been more supportive when I said I was considering it I may have included you. Since you weren't I decided i didn't need the negativity around during a trying and emotional time.. next time they should think before they say somthing about somebody elses decisions; because they just might leave you out of the next one..

Good luck...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×