Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Suddenly Single... now what?



Recommended Posts

What now? Now you put one foot in front of the other and move FORWARD. --and REMEMBER TO BREATH. That's right. Sometimes we all just need to stop and concentrate on taking THE NEXT BREATH and nothing else.

I have been exactly where you are and it sucks!! My daughter also went through a heart break last year. What I said to her first was, "I love you". Then I asked her,"what will you do when "the" call comes"? "You know--when "he" calls". You know it will. It did. She is now very, very happy with---someone else.

This is a fork in the road for you. You are made of stern stuff or you would never have thought of being sleeved. If you need a bit of time, take it, but not too much. You have a wonderful life in front of you. Open your mind and embrace it! Keep busy--very busy.

Keep this in mind as I have tried to do: TO THY OWN SELF BE TRUE. If you can do that, everything will be as it should. I promise.

Valentina

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You are going to be thin and wearing really cute clothes before very long. You're going to have a whole new life.

Just take one day at a time and remember when God closes a door, he opens a window. You're going to have a big huge window of opportunity

opening up to you now!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have been single for a good portion of my life. If you need a special buddy to help you, just private write me. I'd be glad to support you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm sorry you have to go through this. But like it was said a lot above everything does happen for a reason. Hang in there. If surgery is what you want, then go for it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm so sorry you are going through this, I know it's really difficult. You are gonna just have to do YOU girl! Take care of yourself, physically and emotionally. The rest will all fall into place. Distract yourself with activities, get out and enjoy life. Focus on you and your health. This forum is wonderful, and we're all here for you! I hope you continue on your WLS journey, because you deserve to be healthy and happy. If he chooses not to be a part of it, then so be it. You're gonna be fine and do great!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Rachel,

I am sorry to hear about what you’re going through but I just want you to know. You don't need a man to validate you. You need to love yourself enough to do what's right for you, so that when God send your true love, you'll know how you want to be love.

I agree that everyone that has comment has a point. I am new here I haven't been sleeved yet, but I’m going through the process and I'm a single parent I was married for 11yrs and the truth is I didn't really find myself until long after the divorce. What I know today is you don't need a man to make you complete God completed you when He created you.

And know this God loves you and so do I with the love of Christ.

I am here for you; you can just email me private if you need someone to talk with or whatever.

Gina :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You can do this. I know you are going through a rough time right now, but you will find your way. Do not give up a healthier you. I am so sorry this happened to you now, but everyone here will support you through this if the surgery is what you want. Do not give up hope.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Rachel;

I am so very sorry about your relationship ending now, just before you are having surgery. You have had a couple of big changes in your life and now you are heading for another. Probably really hard to be assured that things are going to get better, but they will. Counseling really can help to make sure you are ready for this next step. You don't want to head into VSG with doubts of why you did this and if it is worth it.

We are all here for you and cheering you on. Doing what is best for you, best for your health, best for for future can only be considered a good decision. If you boyfriend could not understand this, then you can do this alone. Hugs.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi All,

My boyfriend of 2.5 years broke up with me a few days ago. We relocated to a new city together about 9 months ago so I don't have any friends here and am farther from my family. The relationship was very serious and headed towards marriage, and now I find myself so lost. I know this surgery is for me, and I still need to go through with it and get healthy and all that, but I have just lost the one person who has truly been there for me in a way that no one else ever could. I have other people to be there for me, but it's just not the same. I'm losing my courage. I'm terrified of dating with loose skin. I'll be living alone during the emotional roller coaster of recovery and I'm terrified of that too. I feel like I have just lost everything. I need help, encouragement. Maybe the singles out there could give me a pep talk?

Thanks,

Rachel

((((((((((((((((Hugs)))))))))))) You can do this! You are strong and once you do this on your own you will be even stronger. Once you are thin and single you will be so grateful I know it doesn't seem like it now but trust me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you all for the support. It has really helped me keep my chin up this week. I do want to go through with it. I have been working on this for a long time and I know it's the best thing for me. The sleeve will allow me to have a new life in so many ways. It's nice to know I have all of you to lean on. Thank you so much!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dude is going to be JEALOUS as hell if he sees you in about a year....probably looking hot as hell with a new guy by your side.

You can do this!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

hey girl, you can do this. take it one day at a time. I'm single, just move to a new town far from family. i'm walking this journey alone (i know God is with me). like everyone said take this time to focus on you.. don't worry about future dating right now. concentrate on a healthier you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Still purging all of the larger clothing. This morning, a shirt that I ADORED wearing ended up on top. Hard to let it go, but it was also hard to let go of those habits that also no longer serve my highest good. Onward and upward!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Onedayatatime365

      Looking to connect with others who are also on the journey of better health. Post-Op Gastric Sleeve (4/11/24).
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×