Hello folks. Here I am again with another question!!

If you chose not to tell people at work or friends about your LB, how did you keep it secret? Did you change your mind and eventually tell? What kind of comments/questions did they ask? How did you handle it?

I am not planning to tell my coworkers. I know they will ask questions as they are super gossipy.

Thanks again for open and honest responses!

I told two people...my boyfriend that i live with and who has been with me every step of the way, and my best friend who lives 12 hours away. I told my coworkers that i had my gall bladder out. I work with nosy women who would be like are you sure you should be eating that, or constantly asking me how much i had lost. Its easier this way. I didn't tell my family anything...i live 6 hrs away and only see them a few times a year. A far as anyone knows, i meet with a nutritionist and i watch what i eat and i exercise.

I have told everyone except for my inlaws. I don't know why it is easier for me to tell a coworker thn my own mil. Oh, we'll. it's a choice we all have to make. For me, I felt like my coworkers would be curious about my portion sizes decreasing so dramatically, Thai went ahead and told them. It made me feel better.

Thank you for the many posts! Great to hear you stories. OK, so how did you handle your first Thanksgiving? I don't really want to tell my extended family, but if I don't eat a ton like normal, they will know something is up. I never pass up loading my plate with my aunt's awesome cooking. How do you handle it? Surely they will notice?

Believe it or not, people are so busy stuffing their faces, they probably wont notice what you eat. If they do comment, just say you picked alot while you were cooking (whatever it was you cooked) and will eat more later.

As for the coworkers, who ever said about female nosey coworkers is so right. I get lots of compliments at work. I've lost 40 lbs and have 50 more to go. One lady said the other day "You don't need to lose anymore, you're already looking too thin." I doubt at 5'2 and 184 lbs I look "too thin". I think people will also try to sabatoge you and its not always with the best intentions. I've told my husband, 2 grown children, 2 best friends and one other that is planning on having the surgery.

As for if they ask how Im losing, I tell them the truth. I'm working out at minimum 4 days per week (and I mean a hard workout). Im counting carbs and Proteins. The band isn't going to make you lose weight, its a tool. You still have to do the work.

I agree that people don't pay much attention to what YOU eat. So long as you don't advertise your food ,surgery,weight loss etc. you would be surprised. I kept saying. I work out a lot (true) I'm really trying. (Almost always true) my stomach is fussy (really true). Often not saying anything was best

I chose not to tell anyone other than close family (at first) and then I was sent to a conference with some co-workers. I ended up telling 2 people that I thought were good friends. Turns out one of them told several people after I asked it not to be told. I still don't want the others at work to know about my surgery b/c they are so caddy and judging already. The other day, while eating lunch in the workroom, several co-workers started bashing people who have had WLS so I feel I made the right choice.

This last bit has just brought tears to my eyes! I'm so happy for you' date=' and I realise that's exactly how I want and need to feel like that - proud of myself for taking control. I'm only in the very early stages of the decision, I've had my first consult with the surgeon and other specialists but I actually took a bit of a break because I had second thoughts - I convinced myself that there was more j could do, I should try again and reassess in another six months. I'm now starting to re-book appointments because I've been feeling anxious and upset. I went to Bali last weekend and I swam once. ONLY because my friends begged me to join them. I was so uncomfortable and it made me so upset. I'm 22 years old and I should be loving life and I'm scared that for every time that I give myself another six months to try a new diet, ill wake up one day and have spent all the happiest and most free years of my life in 'fat jail' where I don't enjoy anything....

I have been silently watching this forum for a few months and this is my first post. I am so thankful for it and for all of you who share your stories and help me work out how I'm feeling.

In response to this thread: one of my biggest concerns/ fears is who to tell. My immediate family already know about my plans (my mum has been banded many years ago) but other than that I think I want to keep it entirely private. Being quite young, my friends and people I associate with aren't mature enough to understand that this is for me and my health. And as a lot of you have said, I don't want (or need) any kind of that negativity in my life when going through something this big! [/quote']

I am 36 and I think about all the years I have yo yo dieted and I had wasted in 'fat jail' (I like that). My surgeon said that I was going to wish I did this years ago. I think you are smart doing this at your age and having energy and health to enjoy. I was banded 1 month ago and have lost 20 lbs. It doesn't sound like much but makes a big difference in how I feel. Good for you.

I think I've told less than 10 people. 10 people that are all supportive and on "team Lauren" to anyone else it's none of their business

I chose not to tell anyone other than close family (at first) and then I was sent to a conference with some co-workers. I ended up telling 2 people that I thought were good friends. Turns out one of them told several people after I asked it not to be told. I still don't want the others at work to know about my surgery b/c they are so caddy and judging already. The other day, while eating lunch in the workroom, several co-workers started bashing people who have had WLS so I feel I made the right choice.

exactly my point..... female co worker are the worst to tell... you just a soon tell everyone your self.

I thought about telling no one except my husband my son and my MIL but ended up telling my sisters and a few more. I haven't even been banded yet and I feel this is my journey and I shouldn't be ashamed of myself at all. People are overweight for so many different reasons and everyone has a different story except the fact we all obviously want to LIVE A LONGER HEALTHIER LIFE!! No one should be embarrassed or ashamed of that!!! Be proud of yourself for making this huge decision that not only will affect yourself but those around us that we love. I think I will share my journey so that others that are in my shoes will get the confidence to do something like this for themselves if they feel they need to. I know this will be a long journey and that it won't always be easy and there will most certainly be ups and downs but the downs will get me to a healthier me!!! God Bless all of you that share my journey!!!

Very few people know...my husband, my parents, my mother in law, and 2 coworkers that also have the band. I sometimes wish my husband was the only one who knew. I'm a very private person, and I'm not one to share much personal information in general. When people ask me what I'm doing to lose weight I just tell them I'm making healthier food choices, and eating less, which is exactly what I'm doing. Now, if someone asked me specifically if I've had WLS, I'd tell them. I'll also share if I feel someone may benefit from knowing (that's why I told my mother in law). I'm not ashamed of my decision, or even embarrassed by it...no reason to be. I just don't feel it's anyone's business.

I was going to tell my best bud at work, but she is a total blabbermouth (but I still luv her) and she is going through weight issues herself. She is always doing weight watchers and is in the 160-190 range up and down all the time. She would definitely blab about my surgery. Where I work, gossip is like wildfire.

Very few people know...my husband, my parents, my mother in law, and 2 coworkers that also have the band. I sometimes wish my husband was the only one who knew. I'm a very private person, and I'm not one to share much personal information in general. When people ask me what I'm doing to lose weight I just tell them I'm making healthier food choices, and eating less, which is exactly what I'm doing. Now, if someone asked me specifically if I've had WLS, I'd tell them. I'll also share if I feel someone may benefit from knowing (that's why I told my mother in law). I'm not ashamed of my decision, or even embarrassed by it...no reason to be. I just don't feel it's anyone's business.

Mandy,

After about six months, i finally got to the point that if some one ask if i had WLS i would say yes. Good for you...

I love this thread.

I'm getting banded on Friday and only have told my mom and husband. I know the people in my life will judge and make a joke out of it.

I'm telling people I'm having my gallbladder out. I did a little research and some surgeons will have you do a clear liquid diet prior to surgery...same as WLS. My cousin had her gallbladder out and lost weight, so that's my story and I'm sticking to it!!

I have only told about 6 coworkers out of more than 50 I work with, wife, kids, mother-in-law know. That's it. I prefer to be discreet about it and if someone asks what's with the weight-loss, I blame diabetes and the hiatal hernia repair. The hernia especially if someone hears me struggling with being stuck in the bathroom. I figure that no one needs to know and the ones that feel conscious about their weight end up working out and becoming healthier on their own. Not hurting anyone by not sharing. Eventually I will "come clean" with every person I meet, but for own this is the way it is.