Hi,

I was banded August 31, 2012 and I choose to only tell my partner at the time (I needed a ride home after the surgery) I never regretted my decision to keep it to my self becuase I was very slow to start losing and I could just imagine what others would have said.

But I am running into difficulty and wondering if others are too and what they are saying?

My friends and co workers are always commenting on how little I eat. I even had to break down and tell my friend becuase she actually asked if i had an eating disorder. My co-worker always say OMG you ate nothing. Now I am sort of lucky I went through a difficult break up and now in the dating circle so i use that as an excuse "lost my appitite through the break up and now on a strict diet becuase I want to look good for dating". But the comments do not stop. Also now that i am dating I am the girls that eats nothing. Also worried becuase i have a bad scar from it do I eventually tell the person i am in a relationship with what it is from?

Anyone else have those problems and what do you say?

I tell them the truth- I choose to eat human sized portions rather than giant sized.

American servings are ridiculously huge and it plays a large part in why as a society we're getting fatter and fatter. You will actually hear of people coming here from other countries and gaining weight from the suddenly giant servings.

i eat now to please myself...but i have not have anyone say what you wrote to me.....they have said things about what i eat now versus what i use to eat...not regarding the amounts......

Most people know I'm banded. It's easier than worrying about what they think. If a waiter asks if everything was alright and then press, are you sure? I just say, I wasn't that hungry. I then ask for a box to take the rest with me and that reassures them. Also, I just order appetizers a lot so that I can eat the portion.

I proudly tell people. I dont think it is something you should be ashamed of. I did have a co-worker tell me, "Oh I thought you were losing weight from hard work" I told him if you dont think these results came from hard work you are sadly mistaken.

I am neither ashamed or embarassed. You are down almost 50 lbs!!! Be proud of what YOU have accomplished.

I tell everyone (sometimes even the waiter so they stop asking if everything is alright!) My mother-in-law knows I had the surgery and still will say Is that all you are eating!! My husband is great about "covering" for too. He will take some off my plate or share servings. I do understand what you are saying but since I have told everyone in my life I answer a little differently. I also often when in public eating I will eat things I know I can get down, like soup or a small salad. or I order apps. The only time I really stress is going to someone's house for dinner. The portions are harder to control but that's when my hubby will come and steal off my plate. Good luck!! I personally would tell anyone that I was close to in my life. The people closest to me are my support!!

Good luck with dating, it's brutal out there, but much better than staying with the wrong person... and it can be so much fun!! When planning dates, chose a place or activity that doesn't require eating, or at least doesn't FOCUS on eating... Visiting a museum, botanical gardens, bowling, sight-seeing, roller blading and similar things. Dates don't always have to be dinner & a movie. As far as friends & family, simply tell them you're eating less and making healthier choices. <3 !

I tell everyone (sometimes even the waiter so they stop asking if everything is alright!) My mother-in-law knows I had the surgery and still will say Is that all you are eating!! My husband is great about "covering" for too. He will take some off my plate or share servings. I do understand what you are saying but since I have told everyone in my life I answer a little differently. I also often when in public eating I will eat things I know I can get down' date=' like soup or a small salad. or I order apps. The only time I really stress is going to someone's house for dinner. The portions are harder to control but that's when my hubby will come and steal off my plate. Good luck!! I personally would tell anyone that I was close to in my life. The people closest to me are my support!![/quote']

Your hubby is a keeper!! LoL

Your hubby is a keeper!! LoL

He is luck he can eat his dinner and mine and not gain weight! Yup, He is a keeper!

Good luck with dating, it's brutal out there, but much better than staying with the wrong person... and it can be so much fun!! When planning dates, chose a place or activity that doesn't require eating, or at least doesn't FOCUS on eating... Visiting a museum, botanical gardens, bowling, sight-seeing, roller blading and similar things. Dates don't always have to be dinner & a movie. As far as friends & family, simply tell them you're eating less and making healthier choices. <3 !

Thank you I like this. I went on a date recently and ordered the soup which I thought was safe. It was the biggest bowl I have ever seen. Needless to say he felt bad becuase I said that the soup as ok I just wouldn't order it again. He kept asking if I wanted anything else. Next time we will stick to non food things great idea.

Sorry to chime in late here. I also have only told maybe 2-3 people. I was fortunate when I first got banded because we moved a mere 6 months afterwards. So I had a fresh start if you will. However, we are all faced with the awkwardness of eating in social settings with the full realization people will notice. So here's what we do or what we say (my husband is banded too)

1. I say I just ate and am getting something light to top me off

2. I say that I am trying to lose weight and I do that by eating all the time but just small portions each meal

3. You can be sassy and just say 'yeah and i noticed you ate SO much' ahhaha j/k

4. I stick to foods that look large but in reality are not, like Soups or I get an appetizer to keep portions small and so it looks like there's less leftover. I get Water even if I dont drink it.

5. Rave about a food you order and say its your fav and its all you'll eat there (to justify eating an app lol)

These excuses can be recycled time and time again if you are w/ new people. But at some point, if you feel you are with the same people all the time, or ultimately you start dating it's probably better to share your news so they can stop asking the q's and start supporting the decision. I kind of like the idea of telling them after losing 50+ lbs so that they can be impressed <snicker>

Happy Dating

That's my plan, to share with the people on a "need to know" basis once I'm close to goal.... Until then, I can count on my hand the people who know.

Those around me who ask I say....."Made lifstyle changes"! I don't really feel like I owe anyone a reply, but if it's someone I like I offer that. But...I have told many people that I got a lap band! Someone asked me if I was sick...I told her the truth...LOL

I've told everyone. You shouldn't be ashamed or embarrassed. This is just a tool to help you lose weight.

I told everyone. I was so happy to be banded. Some might get tired of hearing me talk about it. But I have learned that lots of people won't to know more about the lap band for there self but not sure where to start. So I feel by telling my store it will help others take that step to getting healthy also.

Flip it around and say, "You're eating all that?" When you start to count the calories in the food that people consider to be normal, they would be amazed.