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Sometimes I go on this site and I'm embarrassed to be a member. All of the bickering and complaining and insults. I joined this group for support!!! Support is what I think most of us needs right now. If you are here to fight and argue and put down please find another app.

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Sometimes I go on this site and I'm embarrassed to be a member. All of the bickering and complaining and insults. I joined this group for support!!! Support is what I think most of us needs right now. If you are here to fight and argue and put down please find another app.

AMEN!!!

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I tell everyone about this site because it has helped me a real lot. You are right about the disrespect people have for each other and they don't even know them. We are all a group of people who decided to take charge of our bodies with The Band. We should be here to help and listen and not fight.

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Unfortunately, you're going to have that on any online venue but especially forums.

You have hundreds of personalities on here and some clash. Couple that with the fact text doesn't necessarily read the true emotion of the poster. For instance, more than once I've posted facts that someone has taken negatively. The reason this happens is the poster can't see my facial expression or hear my voice inflections so they're left to their own interpretation. I may say "Stick to your post op diet, it's not worth a slip" out of concern but the person may misread it as said judgmentally

Now, combine that with inevitable: Some people are miserable and want to drag others down in their misery with them. Some people are just plain mean. Some people are so immature it's scary. Some are painfully ignorant. If you put all these people into one big forum- you're bound to have some serious clashes and pissing matches.

Just take the good, leave the bad, and ignore the ridiculousness. It's all you can do.

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Unfortunately' date=' you're going to have that on any online venue but especially forums.

You have hundreds of personalities on here and some clash. Couple that with the fact text doesn't necessarily read the true emotion of the poster. For instance, more than once I've posted facts that someone has taken negatively. The reason this happens is the poster can't see my facial exp<b></b>ression or hear my voice inflections so they're left to their own interpretation. I may say "Stick to your post op diet, it's not worth a slip" out of concern but the person may misread it as said judgmentally

Now, combine that with inevitable: Some people are miserable and want to drag others down in their misery with them. Some people are just plain mean. Some people are so immature it's scary. Some are painfully ignorant. If you put all these people into one big forum- you're bound to have some serious clashes and pissing matches.

Just take the good, leave the bad, and ignore the ridiculousness. It's all you can do.[/quote']

Bashing and a difference of opinion are totally different. I understand what you are saying.

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Bashing and a difference of opinion are totally different. I understand what you are saying.

Oh I agree too, they're totally different.

But remember, there are some nasty miserable people in this world. You put them online and now they can be mean idiots with no repercussions because of the anonymity online provides.

Just try not to let it get to you. I used to get upset by this, but then I realized: I'm dealing with a miserable, unhappy, moron. When I turn off my PC I'll go back to my happy and fulfilling life- and they'll still be a miserable idiot trying to drag others down to their level.

...don't let them drag you down to their level :)

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Misery LOVES company. Ignore the lame post, remarks and focus on and our FUTURE accomplishments. I'm super excited!! Hope you are too!

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Misery LOVES company. Ignore the lame post' date=' remarks and focus on and our FUTURE accomplishments. I'm super excited!! Hope you are too![/quote']

I am super excited!!! I'm being banded Thursday!

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I am super excited!!! I'm being banded Thursday!

I'm with u on thurs!!!

And I totally agree w Mis73 (and all). I've noticed there are some especially positive ppl on the site an I often follow their threads and where they comment. This is too important to get dragged down - I've already got my own saddlebags for that :D

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sadly these type people are on just about every public forum you go on...I do what I always tell my kids to do...I don't cater to ignorance...I ignore them and stick to talking with the fun positive people :)

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I treat this forum (and others) like a big social gathering. I walk around, I talk in conversations that interest me, and once in a while, I come across someone who rubs me the wrong way. I can mostly still be polite to that person, but I won't linger longer than I need to, and when I walk away I don't think twice about them afterwards.

I won't invest in someone who is behind some computer who I don't even know. If someone reaches out to me, and over time we become friends - GREAT! But if it's just some post on a forum, their lives don't impact me or my success at all.

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at times i wonder if some of these people even had the band.....the ones that come in here talking all negative I'm like really ?? pretty sure you are not going through what we are , makes you wonder just sayin

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I sincerely hope that someone who never had the band wouldn't come here--what would that accomplish? Why would they waste their time and energy? I simply believe that people have different experiences and this lends itself to different comments regarding the band. I try to take the good and the bad here, as I've experienced both.

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It's the same on the "sleeve talk" forum which my daughter is a member of. Unfortunately, you're going to get the good and bad of everything.

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      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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