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What did you tell you family/friends?

Hello everyone, I am wanting to keep my surgery on a real "need to know" basis. Has anyone else kept this a secret? What did you say you went into surgery for? Need help on what I can say that would be believable. Alot of people in my life are very against the idea of a lapband. They are also size 8 and never had to work out or diet in thier lives. Thanks!

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I have chosen to tell only a few family and 2 close friends. This is a private event for me and I don't want it advertised on Facebook which is what I know some friends would do....not to be mean but just because everything in their lives goes on FB.

I am just starting my journey. In fact I am outside the clinic now waiting for my 2pm appointment. Once I have a surgery date I plan to be completely honest and tell anyone that inquires. I want to be an inspiration to anyone that has these struggles and I don't want to give anyone false hope that just diet and exercise is always enough because some people need additional help. Lap band is a tool and I am going to be proud to use the tool available to help me have a healthier life. People don't think twice about getting breast implants these days and that's all vanity...it's so sad the social stigma that comes with weight issues. I hope to be a "poster child" success story for Lapband! :) I wish everyone on this journey much success! We are in this together and only we can truly understand what this journey feels like.

FOr people who decided NOT to tell.... I am also not telling, my husband, BFF, and my aunt are the only ones. Everyone else I am telling that I am having hernia repair. The part I am worried about is eating socially? Does anyone notice, I mean how drastically does it change how you eat, chew, swallow etc....

I am also in the beginning of the Lap Band journey. I too plan not to tell. My fiance' and wedding planner (who happens to be my co-worker and close friend) are the only people that know. I too have had fertility issues. So I plan to just say it's fertility-related, and it is. I have had several appointments and procedures related to fertility so it isn't far-fetched for me.

Seminar on Thursday...hoping to have surgery before June 30th, when insurance rolls over into a new year and doubles my out of pocket costs.

FOr people who decided NOT to tell.... I am also not telling' date=' my husband, BFF, and my aunt are the only ones. Everyone else I am telling that I am having hernia repair. The part I am worried about is eating socially? Does anyone notice, I mean how drastically does it change how you eat, chew, swallow etc....[/quote']

Actually the changes in social eating were one of the reasons I decided not to keep it a secret. I realized if my friends know I've had my stomach surgically altered they'll ask fewer questions about why I'm eating so differently (they already get nutrition advice from me so I can't pretend I'm eating the way they should).

Telling people is not an option for me, especially where I work. I work for an alternative medicine center and they are NOT ok with this type of thing. Also some judgmental family that I know would just try to talk me out of it. I may decide to tell some people when its done BUT definitely not the people I work with/for. They are sweet but do every 100% naturally.

I've lost 156 pounds. I tell people what I had done if they ask how I lost the weight.

FOr people who decided NOT to tell.... I am also not telling' date=' my husband, BFF, and my aunt are the only ones. Everyone else I am telling that I am having hernia repair. The part I am worried about is eating socially? Does anyone notice, I mean how drastically does it change how you eat, chew, swallow etc....[/quote']

I haven't had any problems and I go out socially all the time. I focus on looking at the person in front of me and listening to what they are saying. No one even notices!

I'm keeping it to myself as we'll. I will only tell my mom because I have never had surgery before. Plus she is a praying woman so I know I need her there. I'm not telling her until close to my date because she won't understand. But my husband is in support 100percent. He wants to be at every dr appt. Sometimes the less people that know the less opinions they have. Then you have to watch out for the haters. The ones that will discourage you because they want you to stay fat. I'm planning my surgery during some vacation days and using gall bladder surgery as well..

Isn't that the truth? Others who could lose a few pounds (or more) are so threatened when we take action, whether it's a diet we can stick with or surgery.

I have told my husband and kids, of course, my parents, two friends, and my boss. That's it. I have not told my in-laws, siblings, or anyone else. I may decide to tell them later, I may not, but I am pretty sure I will not be telling anyone else at all until after my surgery.

Just noticed your ticker says your surgery is today. Hope it goes/went well and you're feeling great!

Hello everyone, I am wanting to keep my surgery on a real "need to know" basis. Has anyone else kept this a secret? What did you say you went into surgery for? Need help on what I can say that would be believable. Alot of people in my life are very against the idea of a lapband. They are also size 8 and never had to work out or diet in thier lives. Thanks!

I agree with you that it is a need-to-know or who I want to tell deal. Geesh, we don't tell everyone every medical procedure we have, do we? This is no different. I shared this with two of my best friends who I knew would support me and two of my six children (so far). I haven't decided if I'll tell the others before or after surgery but, again, it's not important really. My husband is 100% behind me, "Whatever makes you happy." (I've trained him well!)

I guess I should remove my ticker. I did not have surgery today, my surgery was postponed because I do not have enough platelets. Now, instead of being banded, I am undergoing blood tests and an ultrasound of my spleen. My hematologist has assured me that he will get me to where I can be banded, he just has not specified when. My thoughts and prayers are with all who are being or have been banded, please, if you would, pray me into surgery!

  • 2 weeks later...
I guess I should remove my ticker. I did not have surgery today' date=' my surgery was postponed because I do not have enough platelets. Now, instead of being banded, I am undergoing blood tests and an ultrasound of my spleen. My hematologist has assured me that he will get me to where I can be banded, he just has not specified when. My thoughts and prayers are with all who are being or have been banded, please, if you would, pray me into surgery![/quote']

Hope you get better soon!

FOr people who decided NOT to tell.... I am also not telling' date=' my husband, BFF, and my aunt are the only ones. Everyone else I am telling that I am having hernia repair. The part I am worried about is eating socially? Does anyone notice, I mean how drastically does it change how you eat, chew, swallow etc....[/quote']

After my most recent fill, it's hard to hide how I'm eating in social situations. Taking super small and just a few bites is SO different from me ordering huge amounts of food like before banding. Also, my band is moody. Sometimes all is good and I can eat normally, but less. Other times my band has a mind of its own and sometimes even Soup is hard to eat! It's a learning process. It also depends on who I'm with. Work colleagues wouldn't think twice. My girl friends who also like to eat actually stopped me after dinner 1 night cuz they were concerned about the way I'm eating. So, just eating my lapband size food will freak some people out. But I just tell them I'm trying hard to get healthy. They're still used to seeing me eating the huge burger with fries. Lol

I guess it's unusual from what I've been reading here, but I've told everyone I know/been 100% honest about my March 27 surgery ever since I made the choice in July. I even made a Facebook post about it. I just feel proud about taking initiative in my life to be/feel healthier and gain some self-confidence in the looks department. At the same time, I completely understand why this isn't the m.o. for a lot if you. I've learned a LOT through who has been there for me vs who has been absent or judgemental.

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