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Family Sometimes Makes Me Feel Worse...

Hi fellow lap bandits! I am so frustrated! To date I lost 50lbs. My Aunts best friend lost 125 and she is older than me, has no job and works out almost everyday. She forgets she tells me these things!! So, we were at her Mothers wake and she starts telling me and my Mom that I am doing everything wrong and I should have lost way more by now. That she has not worked out or tried to diet and lost all the weight. Its really frustrating and if I say something, I will be in A LOT of trouble!! I know I need help getting back on track but it is also very upsetting being told every other day how horrible of a job I'm doing. I had no support before surgery, I especially don't want the hassle now!!

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If you don't want it say anything then your only option is to ignore her. Keep doing what you are doing. Seems you have had a good loss so far. ;)

However you could also turn it I to a positive experience... Maybe stop over or call her and tell her you are so impressed with her loss you would like to compare notes and get some tips from her. Granted you may have to patiently listen to her success but maybe she has something which may help you.

I work full time, have a home and family and even travel for business... Yet I lost my first hundred lbs in well under a year.... But I also counted calories, tracked food, and saw my dr monthly. I didn't exercise.

50 lbs is 50 lbs. That is something to be proud of. Was this person alot heavier than you????duh...the heavier you are..the faster is seems to come off. Everyone loses at different rates...you cant compare ( I need to take my own words to heart) your weight loss to anyone elses. Im thinking you may need to mention this to this person how hurtful the comments are and the fact that she shouldnt compare the 2 of you. Keep up what you are doing and dont mind what others say. You are doing fabulous!

Despite what anyone says, losing 50lbs is amazing!! I envy you so much! I'm not quite there yet, and your success is inspiring.

50lbs is awesome.. that is 50lbs less than you were before and thats great! Instead of telling you how bad you are doing, she should have approached with, maybe you should try something different, or try this.. I agree with Floridays and you should approach her in that way also. It might end the bad feelings ( hopefully ) and maybe you might have some support from someone you least expected.

also.. you have all of us here to support you.. would love to see more of you. Become accountable for what you are putting into your mouth and track and measure everything! if you don't have a my fitness pal account yet, or something similar I suggest you get one!. It's soo easy.. and it is the best thing I did to keep my booty on track. I see everything.. and It helps me make better decisions, so if i gained a lbs 1 day, I can look at that and see hmm.. lets see what I should have eaten differently.. you can also add me, destynee13 we can see each other's food diary's and help each other out :)

Support is a big part of success with this band. Know.. that anything you struggle with, you can always come here like you did .. and ask or vent.. or chat.. we are all family here and care a lot of the success of other's not just ourselves. Anyway.. good luck Ms Justine!! YOU CAN DO IT!

  • Author
If you don't want it say anything then your only option is to ignore her. Keep doing what you are doing. Seems you have had a good loss so far. <img src='http://www.bariatricpal.com/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/wink.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=';)' />

However you could also turn it I to a positive experience... Maybe stop over or call her and tell her you are so impressed with her loss you would like to compare notes and get some tips from her. Granted you may have to patiently listen to her success but maybe she has something which may help you.

I work full time' date=' have a home and family and even travel for business... Yet I lost my first hundred lbs in well under a year.... But I also counted calories, tracked food, and saw my dr monthly. I didn't exercise.

[/quote']

Thanks for your support! I know I got off track but sometimes it happens. I'm back on track and really trying!

  • Author
50 lbs is 50 lbs. That is something to be proud of. Was this person alot heavier than you????duh...the heavier you are..the faster is seems to come off. Everyone loses at different rates...you cant compare ( I need to take my own words to heart) your weight loss to anyone elses. Im thinking you may need to mention this to this person how hurtful the comments are and the fact that she shouldnt compare the 2 of you. Keep up what you are doing and dont mind what others say. You are doing fabulous!

She was over 100lbs heavier than me. I wish I could mention it but in my family (traditional Italians), we have to take it in stride. Its just very hard to be torn down constantly. At least I lost 50... So far!!!! Thanks for your support!!

  • Author
Despite what anyone says' date=' losing 50lbs is amazing!! I envy you so much! I'm not quite there yet, and your success is inspiring.[/quote']

Thank you!! You will get there!!

  • Author
50lbs is awesome.. that is 50lbs less than you were before and thats great! Instead of telling you how bad you are doing' date=' she should have approached with, maybe you should try something different, or try this.. I agree with Floridays and you should approach her in that way also. It might end the bad feelings ( hopefully ) and maybe you might have some support from someone you least expected.

also.. you have all of us here to support you.. would love to see more of you. Become accountable for what you are putting into your mouth and track and measure everything! if you don't have a my fitness pal account yet, or something similar I suggest you get one!. It's soo easy.. and it is the best thing I did to keep my booty on track. I see everything.. and It helps me make better decisions, so if i gained a lbs 1 day, I can look at that and see hmm.. lets see what I should have eaten differently.. you can also add me, destynee13 we can see each other's food diary's and help each other out <img src='http://www.bariatricpal.com/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':)' />

Support is a big part of success with this band. Know.. that anything you struggle with, you can always come here like you did .. and ask or vent.. or chat.. we are all family here and care a lot of the success of other's not just ourselves. Anyway.. good luck Ms Justine!! YOU CAN DO IT![/quote']

I will have to look into the fitness account! I never heard of it! Thank you for your encouraging words! Sometimes its difficult when people who had it think they know everything! Both she and my best friend were 100+ from me and they lost faster so they think they know it better!

Thanks for your support! I know I got off track but sometimes it happens. I'm back on track and really trying!

My pleasure.... You have a terrific start having lost the first 50.... Now take it 10 lbs at a time ... It will come off in no time!!
  • 4 weeks later...
  • Author

Hi everyone! So I started changing habits and I lost 2lbs this week! Its not much but its a new start! My bff lost 100 now and I have to say, knowing 3 people who had the band it is VERY difficult to not compare yourself to them. Especially when you see them on a daily basis! But, I did this for me, not anyone else! I am proud to have got this far and I hope these new habits help! I'm not eating until I'm hungry not just because eating small meals every 3-4 hours is supposed to happen. That wasn't really working anymore for and I guess my body just needed an adjustment. Even though the Jersey Shore is gone, I will have a beach ready body by July! I promise myself!! 2012 was a crazy year and I hope 2013 brings everyone nothing short of the best along with our own weight loss goals!!

2 pounds is 2 pounds!! That's exactly what you're supposed to lose in a week. :) Don't compare yourself with anyone - this is your own journey! :)

  • Author

I just bought a Groupon for 10 kick boxing classes!! So excited to start kicking fat off my own ass! LOL

I just bought a Groupon for 10 kick boxing classes!! So excited to start kicking fat off my own ass! LOL

I Love groupon!!! lol.. Your spirits seem a lot brighter! Happy to see that! wooo 2 lbs right on track hun! I totally busted this past week.. now I know why I shouldn't drink.. you get that i dont care attitude. My bf left for a week.. and I felt like a teenager in a house by herself while your parents are on vacation lol.. so.. shame on me.. I'm owning up to it. don't even wanna say how much I gained back.. im ashamed .. but I am right back on track! New year.. :)

You come from an Italian family. That was my problem. I still have the battle scars from growing up in an Italian family. Even at my lowest weight at 20 years old of 118 my mother thought I had a fat a... Yes, not an ounce of fat on me then but she said I was not skinny enough. Fast forward to age 60 ( tomorrow is my birthday). I got the band 4 years ago and have lost the 85 pounds in the first year and am steady between my 5 pound margin of 150-155. Maybe this year I will try to get another 10 pounds off. My family is all deceased and for some strange reason I still feel and look fat because it has been inbred in me. People tell me all the time I look great but there is always that nagging person in the background telling me I am still fat even though I am in size 10-12 clothes. I have my great days and not so great days. In the end you have truly done wonderful with losing 50 pounds. DON'T let anyone tell you that that is not an accomplishment. I wish I was as mentally secure when I was young as I am now. I am happy with myself and my weight and I really don't care what anybody else says or thinks. This is my journey and thanks to the support of people on here you will succeed. Some people just make the journey slower than others. Good luck, this will happen this year.

Hi fellow lap bandits! I am so frustrated! To date I lost 50lbs. My Aunts best friend lost 125 and she is older than me, has no job and works out almost everyday. She forgets she tells me these things!! So, we were at her Mothers wake and she starts telling me and my Mom that I am doing everything wrong and I should have lost way more by now. That she has not worked out or tried to diet and lost all the weight. Its really frustrating and if I say something, I will be in A LOT of trouble!! I know I need help getting back on track but it is also very upsetting being told every other day how horrible of a job I'm doing. I had no support before surgery, I especially don't want the hassle now!!

what you have lost is great and it works for you.

so what if you didnt loose what they did or me or elvis or whomever...the point is you are loosing for YOU....always amazes me that if a person is doing well (as you are) a negative nellie or a debbie downer can swoosh in and take all those good feelings away.

you keep doing what you are doing.

as those who (claim they are not exercising or watchig their weight) will eventually start gaining and then what??.....will see you on the right track and being outstanding.

hang in there

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