What are you looking for in this support group?

[helen098 33]

I am new to all this and don’t mean to offend anyone(Just a newbie so don’t hate me) but it seemd when some one admits to slipping up or being scared of the new life we all hope to have someday that they get a lot of negative response. I don’t mean when some one has a problem that appears to need immediate medical attention and is asking us

Because ther are too scared to call the doc or if the doc tells you to do something and they are totally ignoring the doc and asking those posters may need a kick in the pants but we also need to be understanding of our brothers and sisters fighing this battle against food. Maybe it’s just me but some of the response seem kind of harsh.

I mean where people admit to slipping up during the post op diet ….or eating a little piece of food or wishing they could eat at a party or something.

If we were all perfect then none of us would have needed the band or this group

I am looking for a place where I can come and find real world experience (not instead of my doc but to suplement it)

Little tips and ideas they others have come up with and are willing to share and hopefully eventuially down the road I can share with the new guys . to know what am experiencing is normal

I am looking to get support when all of this seems to be too much and to have others to celeberate with my achievements (small and large)

I may need a kick in the pants sometimes or to be told my pity party is going on way too long but thats ok as needed , I think we all have people in our life who love to tell us how to live and eat and I personaly don’t want/need any more.

didn’t think this was that kind of place

mabye I have no right to ask these questions. But in the short time I have been here I have read a lot of posts that made me sad. Mabye the problem is with email I can’t read the persons intented tone?

Am I in the right place?

What are others looking for in this support group?

[Thee-O 15]

I think you are the right place.

For me, I think a little reality is needed for some people. There is a ton of support on this site and also a a lot of encouragement, but I think we all need to help each other face the reality of our decisions. If I screw up, I don't need someone telling me it is OK. I need someone to help me be accountable for my own actions. We are all going to fumble and fall in life but if you can't take the reality of the situation and do what you can to break the bad habits then how do you learn from this?

I think there is a fine line between keeping it real and bashing...and I don't think many people on here want to bash other bandsters, but we all need someone to help, and sometimes the best help is tough love.

To me I see to much "It is ok, don't let it get you down" on here. I wanna see more, "stop crying and get your ass in the gym". We all know why we are fat, we all know what led us to surgery, but the truth is, we all need a little kick in the ass sometimes....at least in my opinion...

I hope to be supportive and encouraging to others, but I don't want to pussyfoot around our issues either.

[ms.lady 3]

Well said Thee-O!!!

[Dave_NW 92]

I couldn't have said it better. Nice job, Thee-o.

I'm all in favor of support if there is a problem, but I don't understand some of the posts I read here. If someone was given the right information, then they don't follow it, what are they expecting to find here that would make it any different? They still didn't follow the rules, and they need to accept the consequences are their own fault. Everyone needs to take ownership for their own actions. Expecting people here to tell them it's OK to eat half a pizza a week after surgery is just plain wrong. If you're having that kind of problem, call your doctor for help, and face the music. That's why you paid him thousands of dollars.

I'm reminded of the people standing on the deck of the sinking Titanic, up to their ankles in Water. And one of them says, "But didn't you think it was a NICE ship?"

I'm not a hater, but I do get frustrated when people refuse to take responsibility for what they do.

Dave

[54Shirley 105]

Very Well Spoken Thee-o...

This is basically a site for education from the people that have been there, and done it . (IN MY OPINION)

So not just the Newbie, but if you come on with a Question, and someone knows the answer (FROM THEIR EXPERIENCE !) they share it.

This helps a lot of people out. I know when I was New, and the Veterans gave me advice... I listened... I still share the same old good news, because it works !

Some people do need to be jump started, so that preaching that they hear, is for their own good, and they know it.

This site is not meant for HARM ! at all... We all belong to a support group for a reason, and it's not just to be rude, Good intentions are always there, some people are even Humorous. Give it a chance, you will see, that we mean no harm. Just Help, and Concern.

Shirley.

[vickyd 24]

Couldn't have said it better myself...