Feel like I've lost a friend...lol

[melzie_99 22]

I'm going on 2 weeks since my surgery, and I've been doing a lot of thinking. Eating used to be such a cornerstone of my existence; I LOVE food! Well, at least I used to...

It wasn't a matter of being hungry all the time; I just like the way food taste, plain and simple. I was one of those people who when eating something tasty would stuff my mouth full of food and rush to put the rest of it away before I finished what was in my mouth in order to stop. My willpower to stop eating was little to none. I would eat until I was literally in pain, and STILL crave the taste. Food was something I always knew, in some sense, would "be there" for me when I needed it. I could eat something yummy and feel better, occupied, or just plain old satisfied, at least in the short term. Food was my companion when no one else was there.

Now that it's been about a month (between preop diet and post surgery diet) since I've had any "real" food, I find myself somewhat depressed. I'm happy to be losing weight and don't regret my decision, but I just don't feel like eating anymore. I haven't quite wrapped my brain around the idea of eating to live instead of living to eat. Nothing really appeals to me foodwise, and part of me feels like "what's the point"? I know further down the road I'll be able to eat a bit more normally, but right now it sucks. I'm tired of shakes, tired of Jello, tired of mushy food...I want something that actually tastes good. I knew the psychological side of the surgery would hit sooner or later, but I didn't think I'd be taking it this hard. Sorry this is so long; just needed to get this off my chest.

[zubie1eye2 2]

Hey there. Sorry you're having trouble!

Maybe your perspective on food just needs to change a little. Mentally, that's a pain. I figured out that after surgery, I craved crappy food. But when I tasted it? When I went through McDonalds and got something fatty and what I was craving? It tasted horrible.

I feel you on getting tired of the same things. I literally can't look at a Protein shake without feeling a little nauseous myself.

The thing that worked for me? Vary what you eat, even with mushies and soft Proteins, if you're willing to go outside of your comfort zone in terms of what you're willing to try, the possibilities are endless.

Before surgery I lived on fast food and frozen meals and pretty much anything between two slices of bread. Turned my nose up at fish, veggies, et al because I thought they'd be gross. Well. Turns out that's not so much the case.

Food can still taste good. Great, even.

Your eating habits will change. There's no choice. You can't gorge and stuff food in your mouth without consequence. But you can still eat. Food can and will taste amazing. Give yourself some time to adjust. Look up some recipes and make things that sound awesome.

I never did know how to cook before I got my band. Now I love it, and I can adapt pretty much any recipe or food item to be "band friendly." I now pretty much consider myself a "foodie" - before? I just ate because I liked it, without reason. And most of it was crappy, processed food. Now? I eat well, and food tastes better than ever. You'll see.

Find something you love as much as food. Find a hobby, be it indoors or out. Submerge yourself in it. You have to focus your brain elsewhere. It took me a while to find something.

Keep pushing. This is honestly the most important time to do everything right, and really use your band to your advantage. The habits you form now will stick with you, good or bad.

[OnMyWay2Thin 45]

Zubie really hit the nail on the head in her reply. I just wanted to add that I felt the same way when I was in the stage you were in. Keep in mind, you haven't had any real food for four weeks and you are just craving what you can't have. If you're anything like me, that will go away when you start eating again. You'll just eat much smaller portions. To this day when I get a fill and have to go on liquids for three days (my doctor's rules), I still crave food! Then I can eat again and it goes away. I'm hoping it will work the same way for you.

Good luck!

[beernut 0]

((Hugs))

I think a lot of us go through that sadness phase. I know I did for sure. I was so used to having food to fill the various voids within myself that I actually felt empty inside after the surgery. On top of that I was hungry and grouchy and emotional in general. Remind me to give my patient husband a hug today, lol!

I'm almost a year out from the surgery and although I sometimes "miss" the fact that I can't gorge and lose myself in the sensations of eating, it's really not a big deal to me. The worst of the post-surgery sadness faded once I could eat real foods again and I'm guessing that will happen for you, too!