What would you do?

[StephanieO 0]

Hello I am researching LAP-BAND® for my son he will be 14 in January. I know a lot of you will probably say he is to young but he is 5'11 and weighs 355 pounds. He has type 2 diabetes and high blood pressure. Diets do not work he is constantly hungry and he complains of his knees hurting him even when he does not try to exercise. I am scared if he does not have surgery he will have a heart attack or stroke. Always has been a big boy even at birth I have run out of options on what to do with him. Family doctor has suggested he have the surgery. I have an appointment scheduled for the middle of October for him to see a surgeon and they want him to attend a seminar the Saturday before. If we decide to go thru with this I will be paying out of pocket. If this were your son would you let him have the surgery?

[emeraldinthesky 0]

Definitely. Speaking from personal experience, I was a overweight child from the start. 5''5 and 230 in middle school throughout high school it just got worse.Diabetes,high blood pressure the whole thing. And finally at 22 years old, on this Thursday i am getting this surgery. I would have gave ANYTHING to have this surgery at 13 years old. It would have saved me from taking all this medicine, all my personal heartache when I was too at risk to do anything productive and too fat to wear the trendy. It would have saved me from bullies and being the fat fun girl. I know my life will be given a second chance on thursday, but for your son, he still has a shot for his first one. As long as he wants it, I think he should get it.

[btrieger 21]

Hello I am researching LAP-BAND®® for my son he will be 14 in January. I know a lot of you will probably say he is to young but he is 5'11 and weighs 355 pounds. He has type 2 diabetes and high blood pressure. Diets do not work he is constantly hungry and he complains of his knees hurting him even when he does not try to exercise. I am scared if he does not have surgery he will have a heart attack or stroke. Always has been a big boy even at birth I have run out of options on what to do with him. Family doctor has suggested he have the surgery. I have an appointment scheduled for the middle of October for him to see a surgeon and they want him to attend a seminar the Saturday before. If we decide to go thru with this I will be paying out of pocket. If this were your son would you let him have the surgery?

I am in the "he's too young" camp.

How does he feel about this?

You say that diets don't work. What makes you think the Lapband will?

Why is he fat? Is it emotional? Psychological? Physical?

What other weight loss methods have you tried? Have you tried counseling?

The lapband is just a Portion Control tool and will do nothing unless the patient is willing to work with it. Surgery is not a quick fix.

Go to the seminar with an open mind and make sure you get all of the information you can. Please don't go in with your mind made up.

[cwm812 11]

Well, this is a tough one. I certainly understand the problem you're dealing with. I've got 2 sons, one who's overweight and one with type I diabetes (not overweight).

The real problem here is not the surgery, but his maturity. 14 is a particularly tough age for boys. They're just starting high school and they are trying to fit in. I know that I don't know your son, but I know how mine were. They think they know everything and they aren't good about following rules, even when it hurts them. They rarely think about the consequences of anything.

Bob is right. Go to the seminar and make sure that your son knows all the aspects of banding. It's not easy or trouble-free. I think the band may be a good answer for him, but if your son is like a typical 14 year old, you would probably be better off to wait a couple of years. I'm not sure he'll have the skills to be successful with the band. If he were my son, I'd reconsider if he truly understood all the work involved and seemed incredibly motivated.

Cindy

[LPAYTON88 1]

I can understand where you are coming from, I have a 16 year old that is overweight and probably my fault. I have conquered my eating habits but for a teenager it is so much harder. I have considered LAPBAND for my son but he is not in the right mind set yet. He has watched me go through all of this and he doesn't think he can do it. I try to encourage him but in the end he has to want it for himself because it won't work unless you make it work. They have to understand that the weight is not magically going to come off, you have to be dedicated and work hard to get the weight off. I would wait if I were you and try other options first like counseling or take him to the family doctor and have him explain to the child what can happen to him if he doesn't get more active. Hopefully the scare tactic might work for now, give it a couple of years and then see how his mind set is then.

[Laura Lane 0]

hi stephanie...this is a tough question, but i think i would...i would just make sure that the doctor who's attending my son, is a good one....plus all the talk and action, he needs to definitely change his eating habits....whichever way, i wish you both the best of luck.:smile2:

[MRSKOUBiK 27]

I think 14 is just too young to mentally and physically go through with this. It's a life changing decision. And, there's just so much that goes into it. I would be afraid that it would be just too much for a 14 year old to take.

I watch the Biggest Loser, and one of the girls on there had WLS at 14, and she just was clueless. The band is a tool to help you be successful. But, the real work comes within.

I wish him the best of luck with whatever is chosen.

[StephanieO 0]

I am in the "he's too young" camp.

How does he feel about this?

He realizes that this is not just another diet that he will be making a decision that will change the way he lives for the rest of his life.

You say that diets don't work. What makes you think the LAP-BAND®® will?

He knows the LAP-BAND® is not a magic pill. We have talked about what he wants from the band, and it is help with him feeling full faster so he does not wind up eating excessively.

Why is he fat? Is it emotional? Psychological? Physical?

He has always been a big boy. People have always just assumed he is older than he really is because of his height and weight. His dad and I are not petite people so maybe some genetics have come into play. He is a happy young man with friends and does well in school. I am not trying to make excuses for him the reason he is fat I guess is he just eats to much does not matter if it is a bag of carrot sticks or a bag of chips he does not get full.

What other weight loss methods have you tried? Have you tried counseling?

He has been on low calorie diets,low fat diets,low carb diets. I have bought diet cookbooks,diabetic cookbooks,vegetarian cookbooks. He has been to see a nutritionist twice. Is seeing a counselor now who is agreeing with the family doctor that he should consider surgery.

The LAP-BAND®® is just a Portion Control tool and will do nothing unless the patient is willing to work with it. Surgery is not a quick fix.

My son is willing to do whatever it takes to get healthy he just needs help and knows this is not a fix but a tool that will help him to become healthy and live longer. He realizes that he has to follow surgeons orders and do what he is told.

Go to the seminar with an open mind and make sure you get all of the information you can. Please don't go in with your mind made up.

We have not made up our minds about surgery. This is to important of a decision to just do it on the spur of the moment. I have started writing down questions that I will ask about at the seminar. My son is so important to me I am doing all the research I can but it is proving difficult to find for his age.

[honk 780]

I think my biggest concern is will the rest of your family be making life style changes regarding food in the home. While I perscribe to the 90/10 rule (eat correctly 90% and let the other 10% take care of itself); 90% is a lot of the time. I'm not saying the rest of the family can't occationally have diet unfriendly foods but you can not have food for him and foods for the rest of you. My personal experience as a child was that my mother constantly complained about my weight but my available food choices were'nt very good either. I would be very concerned about him feeling stigmatized that he has to live a certain way while the rest of the family can do what ever they want. Unless I've missed it I did'nt see whether he's actually seen a psychologist, a nutrionist is not good enough.

You mentioned Portion Control. That is a huge issue for me and while the band can help it's not unbeatable. If you do enough research you'll see that some people ask is it okay for me to have low fat ice cream every night or shakes from McD's.

I feel his pain. By the time I was 18 I had done two diets and lost over a hundred pounds each time. Do I wish I had done the band years ago when it first came out yes. Perhaps I would'nt have had a stroke at 39.

If you do go forward with the surgery I would be very careful who knows about the surgery at school. Children are savage and I can guarentee you that some jackass will make fun of him because of it. I would not trust that teachers can keep their mouths shut esp. if they disagree with the decision to have surgery.