My darling sweetie has these friends he has known all his life that happen to be doing some business out here in Calif and we got together with them tonight and took them to dinner. I'll call them G1 and G2. Sounds harmless enough right? OH NO!!!!! Here is where it can get "icky" for the faint of stomach.

Again I warn you if you have a sensitive constitution then STOP reading NOW! I am not kidding here.

OK you were warned!

There is this restaurant John and I frequent called "Claim Jumpers". It is a chain in Calif that serves LARGE portions of EVERYTHING. Now all I can eat are the salads and the soups. LOL!! But I digress! So we take John's life long friends to dinner at this restaurant. Wait I am leaving out some important back story here. These friends are two brothers that look like twins and are 54 and 56 years old. They travel EVERYWHERE with their 87 yr old mother, who looks younger than her sons. I wanna look like her at 87. They have never been married and never had girlfriends. Honestly they look like they could be child molesters. Ya know? Just really creepy looking. They are out here attending a really really expensive Film Market Conference cause they are gonna be film moguls. Yes I said they believe they will make it big in the film industry after attending this conference. Can we say delusional?

Anyway, they come out to the house tonight to visit and we take them to dinner. OK we are at the restaurant, the waitress comes, she takes our drink order and our appetizer order. Everything is OK up to this point. She returns with our drinks and proceeds to take our dinner order. One of the brothers, G1, starts telling the waitress what he wants and then proceeds to change his mind in mid sentence. 5 TIMES!!!!!!!! Then G2 orders. Says, "I'll have what my brother just ordered, only make mine different." I swear he said that. Finally they get their order right. Their mom and I order something really simple. So does John.

Here is where you can stop reading if you have that weak stomach.

G1 begins eating the appetizer (mozzerella sticks) by dipping not one not two but three sticks in the sauce and then dripping it on the table and then sucking it off the sticks. Then he dips the sticks in the sauce again (double dipping). Normally I don't mind that but this was just sickening. I did NOT eat any of the appetizer after I saw that. After the sticks are all gone he takes the bowl of sauce and licks it. I swear he did this. Then he proceeds to let out this HUGE burp. And and scratches his belly then scratches his head. EWWWWW!!!!!

Our meals come. I am getting nauseated all over again. He orders Prime Rib with a baked potato. He is about 4 inches away from his plate and proceeds to attach his steak like it was a fresh kill. He dips and slathers and chews and grabs and burps and scratches and chews and chews and spits. I wanted to leave the table but was so facinated by the carnage. He picks up the left over pieces of steak and proceeds to gnaw at the meat left on the fatty portions with his fingers. I swear it was liking a lion eating a fresh kill. G2's table manners were more refined. At least he took his time and didn't act like he was scared someone was gonna steal his food like G1 acted. The waitress game and was taking away everyones plates. G1 looked at his brothers plate and said I will eat his leftovers don't take his plate. I swear he said it and did it.

G1 liked everything clean. It was like watching a dog lick a plate clean. Swear!! I was afraid to put my fingers anywhere near him. He would have thought they were something to eat or lick. EWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!

Then on the way home, G1 burps really LOUD in the car and the smell nearly made me vomit. NOT PB but vomit.

They are gone now. Thank goodness.

Thanks for reading. I told you to stop reading this is you had a weak constitution. I warned you. LOL!!

Oooh yuck. Good table manners seem to be a rare thing these days.

Hmmmmmm reminds me of my Family... now I wonder why I dont have dinner with them more offten. It is pretty gross how people eat.. but thank goodness we are not like that huh. And thankgoodness we CAN'T be like that...

And the mother just sat there the entire time motionless? I say smack the mother b/c she taught them no manner nor did she try to during the meal.... 50 something or not. You should call them P1 and P2 (pig1 pig2) LOL.

I work with this guy who just turned 50 and every time we go out to lunch with the department he does something that grosses me out. One time he farted at the table and it stunk to high heaven. We all knew who did it and he acted like it was nothing, he also burps out loud. I mean if you gotta burp, put a napkin in front of your mouth and let it out easy not blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Glad they are gone for your sake Penni.... ick, how skin crawing (chester brothers LOL).

I was wondering, how many face lifts has the mother had to look like she's younger than her swine boys?

OH My God I would have lost it! I can't STAND hearing or seeing people chew! Big time Pet Peave of mine. If I have to hear it I WILL loose it. I have a girlfriend who can't chew anything without her mouth being open. I can say I haven't been out with her where food is involved! One year at the Haunted House my job was to serve donuts and hot apple cider to the customers and tell ghost stories around a camp fire. Cool concept..how ever..........we had a HUGE group of about 25 people (all from the same family I think!) who were snarffing down their donuts and cider. I couldn't believe all the noise that was coming outta them on just a stupid donut!!! It was horriable. They asked me if they could have seconds and I told them NO..COMPANY POLICY ONE DONUT PER CUSTOMER.......There was no such policy.....hehehe Hey self preservation!!! SELF PRESERVATION. Sooooo I can TOTALLY understand your situation. Maybe next time they come around, when they MAKE IT BIG....John can take them alone, and you can stay home and pamper yourself with a hot bath and a nice QUIET meal at home~~~~~~~

Now we know why they are still single.

No decent women would have them. Not only are they mama's boys but they are disgusting.

I would have told him {Didnt your mother teach you any manners} right in front of them both.

That is just disgusting! I think I would've had to leave the table. Blecht!

OMG -- that is gross.

You said the problem early on...

They have never been married and never had girlfriends.

need I say more?

I was discussing this last night with John and he said he noticed some of what had happened and was oblivious to most of it. He was trying to do all the talking so they wouldn't. I laughed and said I would have preferred for them to talk and that way their mouths would have been too busy to eat. LOL!!!

THey attacked the food like it was their last meal. I was shocked. I had never seen people eat this way. John had warned me about their eating habits but I thought it can't be that bad. Boy was I wrong. G1 licked the little dish that held his cheese sauce. He licked his little container that held the sauce for his prime rib. EWWWWWWWWW!!! Just so gross.

I could barely finish my salad. Well I couldn't even if they weren't there, cause Claim Jumpers serves such huge portions but that is beside the point. LOL!!

Mom hasn't had any face lifts. They can't afford them. Hence the reason we took them to eat. They are so delusional in their lives. They have had all kinds of big ideas to 'make it big' in this world. They bought a small airstrip and one plane in CT cause they were gonna be commercial pilots and start their flagship company with this one airstrip and one airplane. LOLOLOLOL!!!!! There have been other ventures like this. None have panned out of course. Now they fancy themselves screenwriters. I have read one of their scripts. It is just horrible. The latest venture now is they are going home to CT on Tuesday and are in the process of buying a mom and pop video store. They think this will help them in the screenwriter company. HOW I don't know??!!

It is all pretty sad actually. Mom is a pretty lady. She was a professional dancer with a vaudeville act in the 20's and 30's. I noticed last night that her glasses were broken and held together with tape on each ear piece. That was so sad that they can't afford to get her new glasses but they can afford to spend frivilous money on this conference they just attended. Their minds don't work right. LOL!!!

Anyway, thanks for letting me vent.

Yeah, that bugs me when I see people who don't have a lot of money to begin with, going around and blowing what little they do have on stupid crap. (This coming from someone without a lot of money myself mind you.)

I mean, there are so many ways to cut corners, it blows me away when people sit there and gripe that they don't have any money, but yet they're willing to buy that $3 cup of coffee or pop or whatever on a daily basis.

I guess I've just become the queen of thriftiness, and have learned that when you live on a budget, you have to go without a lot of things. (We got rid of our cell phones right after I quit my full time job to have Dylan, and shut our cable off ourselves too.)

Anyway, sorry for my ramble.

Penni,

These guys remind me of the movie "Dumb and Dumber"! Maybe they are going to hit stardom from making a movie about themselves....

NO, NOT DOUBLE DIPPING, I won't eat after anyone who double dips, well except for the grandsons, I mean anyone. That was rude and disgusting, ERRRRR!

Ewwwwwwww! No wonder they are still single. moms is probably the only one who'll put up with them.

Well thanks Penni - no worries about me wanting to snack tonight YUCK!~!!!!!!

Okay, I was struck by how funny it was for a Bandster to be freaked out by burping and farting.

Sorry, just stuck me as funny....

"am I in heaven? I must be since I just heart the trumpets of the angels" (my dH)