A friend and I were discussing what things we had done because we were ashamed of our weight and eating habits. Hopefully I'll never do any of these now that I am banded! Anyways, here's a few of mine to start out:

1. Shopped at Lane Bryant and turned the bag inside out so I didn't have to carry the bad around the mall and have everyone know I was plus size (like they can't tell anyways.....)

2. Order fast food to take home or to the office and get more and eat it in the car and throw away the wrapper so when you get to home or office it looks like you are only eating a "normal" amount.

3. trying to be really quiet when opening the fridge or a wrapper so noone will hear

4. cut the labels out of all of my clothes out of fear a tag would stick out accidentally and people would see how fat I really am!

Great thread!! I'd have to admit to ALL of the above....PLUS...

Going on my lunch break to the grocery store and eating a dozen doughnuts before I picked up the kids after work. I'd eat six at my lunch break and then the other six before I'd pick them up so I could throw away the box.

I'd make sure I put gas in my car to empty the garbage out before my husband would ride with me and see the FULL garbage.

I'd hide food boxes and bags in the bottom of the garbage can at home.

This list could go on forever.... (sigh) It's nice to know I'm not the only one. Thanks everyone!

I too have covered my lap on an airplane because the seatbelt would not fit.

Many years ago I went to Six Flags and got on a ride. The bar pinched my skin but I didn't say anything, rode the full ride in pain and had a large chunck of skin hanging off my body when it was over. I stood in the bathroom bleeding and all I could think was I hope no one sees. Not thinking about my own physical pain but about the embaressment factor.

I don't go on rides now but I look forward to doing so in the spring of next year. Screw the extender! I won't need it!

I never ordered another drink at the drive through or cake if I wanted the frosting. I've never been ashamed of what I've ordered - how does anybody really know where or why your ordering it? Well I take that back - when I would go to Quik Trip and just pick up late night junk food at work - the person behind the counter would ask if I worked at the fire dept. because of my work shirt and I would lie and say yea just making a late night run for the guys at work because I'd have a wide variety of junk food that was really for me since I didn't know what I was in the mood for.

I still do the pull my shirt out of my fat rolls constantly - like it really helps or something! I do this constantly - everytime I stand - everytime I move - I have to adjust myself for fear of someone seeing the shirt tucked in my fat rolls. My boyfriend has always asked me why I do that - I lie and say I don't know. He really knows because its gotten brought up in one heated argument - he's like why are you constantly pulling at your clothes even when its just you and me sitting at home? Is it because your not comfortable with who you are? Grrrrrrrrrrr hate it when they speak the truth because it hurts so bad - it hurts even more coming from someone you love.

I've been terrible and accused him of calling me fat which he never has but sometimes I told him he makes me feel like I'm fat - and he said you are! I about died it hurt so bad - until he went onto say but that's just it - your the only one who has the issue with you being fat - who cares what everyone else thinks - I don't care that your fat - I love you for who you are - your body is only a shell for your spirit - but it still hurts to hear your boyfriend say it even if it is the truth. Then again on the other hand - maybe he's right - maybe I should let all my complex's go since he obviously doesn't have a problem with my bigness - maybe it is all my problem and I only like to pretend to blame him too. He only cares about me being healthy and so far I haven't had any health problems related to my weight but I know I will in the future.

I cancelled my Nascar Season tickets because I couldn't bear another year of sitting through another 5 hour race stuck in those tiny uncomfortable seats with the bars cutting into my hips and people too close.

I stopped going to summer music concerts because I would literally be drenched in sweat very quickly and it was embarrasing being with a group of skinny friends looking like you just ran through the sprinklers.

i still have guilties because i was hiding the Nutella box from my husband!

i feel sooo guilty cause i did such thing!!

i wasn't giving him not even one spoon :(

i was also cutting the labels (i didn't want to believe that i had xxl clothes!)

of course i will do it again since to buy again medium to small size ..uufff ufff

I really don't do any of these things. I've never ordered extra things, or hidden food to keep people from knowing I ate it. (Actually I have, but it was to keep DH or a kid from knowing I spent money on a burger or something because we're on a tight budget, not because I ate it, because DH would fuss or a child would feel deprived.)

I have hidden certain foods at home before, mainly to keep someone else from eating them.

My dirty little food secrets are more along the lines of opening a can of sweetened condensed milk and having a few spoonfuls, or eating 4 inches of a roll of cookie dough (Personal mantra: Cookie dough is the devil.)

I am coming to realize how fortunate I am that although I'm 130lbs overweight, I do not have many of the food demons that others are working to overcome.

I have been thinking about this a lot lately. I really should probably write this on the why we are fat thread. My personal food demons are family stresses and a huge legacy of body dysmorphia brought on by a very critical petite mother. She made me feel huge when I was perhaps on the larger size of normal. I see it now, because my daughter is very much the same body type I was, and I have several t-shirts and dresses still from childhood that she now wears or tries on. I am constantly amazed to see she can wear them, and I know she is a normal size. I thought I was a cow.

I am working hard to break that legacy. She has never felt "fat". Is she rail thin? No, but neither is she out of the norms. She is almost 12, 4-10, and weighs about 110lbs and wears a size 14 in girls (not juniors).

My other food demon is one that I'm beginning to conquer, which was I really followed my DH's eating patterns. It didn't matter that he was more athletic and had twice the muscle mass I did, if he ate 4 slices of an 8 slice pizza, I ate the other 4. I wanted my fair share. It's only been in the past few years, as he has let his eating get out of control, and he would willingly eat 6 or 8 slices of pizza that I have been more aware of my problem and now give myself permission to only eat 3 or even 2 slices. I also give myself permission to eat a salad instead of brats. I've allowed myself not to have to do or eat what he does. It's been one of the most important things I've done.

I still battle food demons. I really need to bake every bit of cookie dough when I open the package, or like yesterday, I'll end up having 4 inches of dough for Breakfast. The Cookies themselves aren't as much of a hazard. Those I can share and have a few and quit. The dough is like an obsession.

So those are my dirty little food secrets. I know I'm becoming stronger every day and I can let those bad habits go.

Always

Hunzi

Good post Hunzi. I can relate to not foistering my own eating problems on to my daughter. My daughter is 8 and weighs 70 pounds and stands about 4'7. She is going to be tall...yea!!! anyway...sorry got sidetracked. I do my best to make sure that she has enough Protein and not too many Snacks. I have to fight myself not to go overboard with the no snacks rule. Kids should have fun when there that age about food, we just try to find compromises, like eating wheat bread on her sandwich , but I cut it into fun shapes. Things like that.

PS sorry for hijacking the thread. :-)

When I was younger and in high school, I would wear jackets ALL the time...regardless of the weather because it helped hide the fat rolls...or so I thought. I still have way too many jackets in my closet, but I only wear them as needed. I am also guilty of standing at the fridge late at night and gobblin up pudding, cookies or Hostess wrapped up cakes. I wouldn't be happy with one pudding I would have two or one pudding and a cake...I would throw the wrappers out and put papers or something else ontop of the wrappers.

1) I would eat an entire pizza by myself & hide the empty box in the oven until trash day (DH never looks in the oven)

2) I would eat something while I was cooking something else, and then eat what I cooked as well

3) carefully peel back the foil on cake frosting to eat some, then put it back so that it looks like it hasn't been opened yet

4) order a combo meal at a fast food drive-thru with an extra burger on the side & eat the extra burger in the car before getting home

5) I started super-sizing my fast food meals whenever I knew no one was going to be around to see me eating that much

I have done all of the above! My personal favorite is walking up the stairs at school and standing in the stairwell until I catch my breath and then walking into the halways after normal breathing came back. There are so many more I can't even begin to remember.

I rotate grocery stores so I won't be seen in any one store too often.

How sad.

I don't know why this thread makes me laugh so much, b/c really it is sad .... but it is good that we are all admitting these secrets. I don't know about ya'll but admitting this stuff makes me FACE THE TRUTH and makes me want to change these ways even more! This thread has really helped me (even more) to feel like I have people here on LBT that understand what it's like to be a fat person, to have food control you, to be embarrased, etc. I am so happy that I have my band and that I have you guys as a support network. If I ever catch myself doing any of these things again I am going to think of this thread and remember that I am a new person now and I don't need to do these things!

Anyways, thought of a few more:

- pretending I was out of money when shopping with friends (didn't want to admit I couldn't fit in the sizes at the normal stores they shopped at)

- when I was in high school I would get fast food when I got out of school at 4 and eat it and throw the wrapper in a neighbor's trash bin so my parents wouldn't get mad that I ate before dinner

- make sweets for the "office" just because I wanted them

- I have gone through a drive thru with my dogs and pretended that extra burger or extra taco was for them

- cut 1/2 inch off the top of my jeans to have more room and just ignore that they kept getting tighter b/c I had gained weight

I have eaten candy bars in the car, and hid the wrappers to throw away somewhere else. I have made a bowl of ice cream in the middle of the night, and made sure the dishes were washed up and put away so no one would know.

Most of my eating is done out in the open, except for the sneaky candy bars.

Things I haven't done because of my weight...those are more like activities...less swimming or boating (those darn suits do not hide enough!), or not hiked up a hill, or not walked as far or done as much as I would have liked to. I have pretended the seatbelt was buckled on a plane, when, in fact, it couldn't

Great thread, and reassuring to see that we all mistakenly believed we were really getting away with something, when, in fact, there is no such thing.

Not too sure about things I've specifically DONE, but I'm very sure of alot of things I have NOT done, like dancing, swimming, riding rides, riding horses, staying outside in the heat, playing volleyball, riding a bicycle... shall I continue?

This is a wonderful thread. I can't believe that I'm not the only one who has done some, or most of these things. Probably the most amazing one I have found to share with others is the seat belt thing on airplane. I used to have this one long black cardigan that I would always wear when I rode on a plane so that I could take it off and lay it across my lap and chest, pretending like I was cold, so that no one would see that I wasn't wearing my seatbelt. To think that I would rather have put myself in danger than ask for an extender. The funny thing is that the surgery has changed my state of mind and acceptance of myself so much so that about three months after the surgery, I had to fly home for my grandmother's funeral and I was able to openly and matter-of-factly ask for an extender, only to find that I didn't really need it anymore. I don't know what made me happier, the fact that I didn't need it, or the fact that I no longer cared about what someone else thought.

I have also done all the drive thorugh tricks, one of which was ordering 3 or 4 kids meals as I drove home from work as it is easy to pass those off as something that you are just bringing home for the kids. And I would go so far as to get them with lemonades and milks to really make it look for real. How pathetic.

Don't make me tell you the number of donut boxes and pizza boxes that have fossilized under my bed, or how many times I've called out to the "family" when the pizza guy comes. You would think he would catch on when he never actual saw anyone but myself. And my DH used to say that I could support a small country on the recycling of my Diet Coke cans. Little did he know they were filled with candy wrappers...

Thanks for this thread. It's brought laughter and memories of a life I no longer am lost in.

I have many- but the first one is---

Similar to you guys about the fast food & the extra drink---

I have pretended I was talking on the cell phone while paying for fast food & Saying" Yes- sweetie I got everything you want & then some" or something along those lines. Just so they would never think she could eat ALL OF THAT FOOD HERSELF> which of course I could;0(