I will have had my band for a month on the 5th. I've done excellent on my eating and pretty good on my working out up until last Saturday and Sunday. I tried to get back on track yesterday. I did okay, but didn't exercise.

I'm beginning to feel like life with the band is too hard. Finding the right things to eat, getting enough to eat, making time to exercise. It's making me very upset.

I get my first fill next week, and honestly I'm really scared about how I'm going to handle it.

My Mom recently asked me if I thought my band cost me too much. I asked her what she meant and she said "it seems you've lost your relationship with your best friend (which is likely true), and you're having to totally change what your eating and how you're living your life".

Up until now I was really loving my band and feeling really positive, but now I'm feeling really frustrated. Not to mention that last Thursday I supposedly gained 1.8 pounds back from the 9 I had lost - if that's even accurate.

Has anyone had a similar experience to this or can help me?

Its normal to feel the way you do at this point. And, yes, you have lost a friend...........most of us have used food as our friend to support and console us thru the years, but your new BFF is waiting.........the one who smiles back at you when u look in the mirror and LOVES what is smiling back!

Hang in there-once you get some good restriction your views on food should change. It's funny how that happens, but it does.

I wouldn't go back for anything...........I only wish I'd done it sooner.

You've only got a month of experience, and part of that was post-op diet which isn't very realistic when it comes to what you can eat. Like any new thing, you have to concentrate on it more but with time many of the choices become almost second nature. For example, I can now look at a piece of meat and know how much of it I can eat; earlier, I had to think about it.

Your first fill will start you on the road toward restriction -- and that means that you will have a "governor" on your eating. So don't dread this fill or the ones to come later. Consider them as stepping stones.

Well, I think you may still be in the healing stages. Don't rush your body. One thing at a time. Heal your body , walk, drink lots of fluids, get yur protein grams in. That is the big thing for you right now. If I read your post correctly you are only a 4-5 weeks post op. This is a good time to prepare your mind for the long haul. This is not like the diets we tried and failed at so many times. You can do this. You have a big investment in learning all that is new to your eating and getting healthy. I am 17 months out and have ahd 10 fills and one slight unfill, currently have 8.6 in a 10 cc band. I started exercising at 6 weeks post op, by then my energy levels were getting up there and the more I did the better I felt. Still now, the more I do the better I feel, I have lost 65 lb, still 10 lb from goal. I went from a size 16-18 to a current 6/8. You can do it, find your good influences and stick with them. Rest when you need to rest and eat when your tummy is growling. I have too much time and energy invested to fall off the wagon more than aday or so at the time. Hang in there, Remember this is your chance at a new life or a better life than what your were living pre-banding...Good luck

I already miss the solace I found in food. It wasn't a healthy relationship though.

I have been banded for over two years and it has been a huge struggle for me. Food was my best friend and I'll admit that two years later I still miss it. I went off track for almost a year and was only eating candybars Cookies and icecream and believe me those go down nicely, I had to get my head in the game and realize that I didn't just pay $13,000.00 for something that I'm not going to take advantage of.

Yes it is hard, it's a lifestyle change. I still have many friends that while they are eating bread or something I can't have like soda they sit there and feel bad the whole time, but I CHOOSE THIS LIFESTYLE!!!

Keep looking at the bright side of things even though I haven't lost even half the weight I wanted to I have lost and I can honestly say that without the band I wouldn't have lost that much weight.

I thought she meant food by her best friend? I could be way off though.

In the end its about what is more important because you do lose some things. For me, I just couldn't stand feeling as poorly as I did and knowing it was only going to get worse. I already miss the solace I found in food. It wasn't a healthy relationship though.

My Bad! It didn't hit me that way because I never thought of food as my best friend even before the band. I felt kinda dumb after I went back and read it . Sorry!:

The band is completely worth it. Before I had the band, I was taking three diabetes medicines - now I take none. My blood sugar is completely normal. Did I have to give up eating unhealthy foods - yes. Do I have to exercise - yes. Is it worth it to feel this good - of course.

There are times when I think it would be nice to eat more but the health benefits outweigh the lost food.

If it helps...what you are experiencing is a type of loss -- and like all losses there are several steps before acceptance -- denial, anger, bargaining, etc...

For me, this has been scary! I realized something -- that even though I have always wanted to be thin, that I was "comfortable" the way I was. I could eat whatever I wanted, whenever. It was terrifying that I might have to give up certain foods because when all else failed, they were always there for me in the past. At times, I almost panicked as I thought about what I was "giving" up. Then, in my mind I decided to NOT think of it that way. Instead, I think of it as a trade. I am trading warm bread with butter for a healthier heart. I an trading popcorn for a longer life with my DH.

I know there will be times in the future that I forget all about "trades" and mourn the loss of my comfort zones, but hopefully those will be short and if not sweet, at least bittersweet.

Good luck on your journey!

Wow, I think you were in my head when you wrote this. I too have been feeling a bit (A BIT) discouraged, but only because I've been a LOT stressed lately and when I stress I eat, so I was mad because I can't eat like I used to. I know that this is the best thing thats happened to me because it makes me more and more aware of all the bad habits that I had prior to the surgery. Last week was really hard on me for personal matters and yes the Michael Jackson death just put my emotions on a roller coaster (our family is BIG on music and he was a great influence on that) so I wanted to eat those cookies and cry at the videos, but I didn't. I realized that was what I always did and I need to focus on something that will help me in a more healthier way. So I went to the gym and jammed to the best MJJ mix ever and even cried a little on the treadmill. :redface: The old ways were just not working for me, and this is why I decided enough was enough. When we fall we have to learn to get back up, dust ourselves off, and keep it movin'! Today we had a post op group meeting and it also inspired me to get right back on track, having that group with people who are going through the same exact feelings as me is very theraputic (sp?) and I enjoyed it. I get my first fill July 13 and DAMN I can't wait!!

I was banded 4 1/2 weeks ago. I have been miserable ever since! have to go back to teaching in 4 weeks, so I'm having it removed this week. I was a basically healthy person before who needed to lose 80 pounds. I worked out regularly and ate healthy foods (probably too much healthy food). Low blood pressure, cholesterol, no sign of sugar.

I decided to get the band because I had a close friend who had it done after her daughter got the lap band, and she has been very happy with the results and the lifestyle. She has not had any of the uncomfortable symptoms that I am having.

Now, I am nauseous all the time, feel very restricted, have developed lactose intolerance, have no energy, and am hating life. This was the biggest mistake of my life1! I am praying that this reversal will get "me" back.

Good luck to you.

I agree with everyone here. I have my first fill tomorrow and I am very excited about it. I am going to go join Curves today. I used to do advanced aerobics 3 times a week and I hope to get back to that some day but for a start I decided Curves was the way to go and then move into more advanced exercise. I am trying to do things that I will give me something to look forward to. It was depressing initially to think I am changing my life forever and my family was very hard on me. I am going to visit my parents in Sept. and the first thing my Mom said to me was that she will go to the grocery and stock the fridge. I said to her, no Mom, we will go when I get there. That way I can control what I eat while I am away. I just decided to control my life and not allow everyone else to control it for me. I know you will get through this and move on. Find the strength you had when you decided to do this surgery and went through with it. You were determined then. Dig down deep and find it again. Good Luck.

Things will get much better eating wise later on. The first few months you are more limited on what you are eating...After that, I was pretty much able to eat anything I wanted.

When I go out to eat with friends/family they barely notice me eating different than others (at least I think they don't). They just joke that I ALWAYS have leftovers.

As you go on, even you will feel "normal". You will think you are eating WAY too much, but in reality, it is the right amount for you!

I am almost 7 months out now and feel great!

Wow, your doctor is going to let you remove it after only one month? I'm surprised they aren't trying a few things first. Will insurance pay for this?

Lindsay,

I had surgery on June 5th, and I too have had some of the same feelings you have. I got depressed thinking about having to give up something that was really important to me. Although I wouldn't call food my best friend, it was the one thing I could count on to get me through something tough, and now I am going through one of the toughest things I have gone through, and I can't turn to food. I started to feel this way one week post-op, I just had to remind myself why I did this, and think about what the outcome is going to be. Right now is really hard, because I have no restriction, this past weekend was hell. I cheated, but got back on track something I couldn't do without the band.

Yes, I sometimes feel that life with the band is too hard. I get mad when I can't finish everything that's on my plate. And I don't like exercising. And don't like not being able to wash my food down with a big swig of diet soda.

But the reality is that it's not too hard. It'd be much much harder to do the same that I'm doing now WITHOUT the band.

Without the band, I'd still be eating twice as much food as what's necessary for my body. And being lazy on the couch with my 44 ounce Diet Coke. It'd be a very easy life - and I wouldn't be losing a single pound.

Or, I'd be starving myself to lose weight, and would feel hungry all the time. I'd probably be able to lose 20-30 pounds and then I'd gain it all back eventually, with some extra company. THAT was hard.

I understand what you're saying. This isn't easy. But it's better than the alternatives. Even though we know in our heads that it's a lifestyle change, and we're gonna have to work at it, it's a huge reality check when the work actually starts. Hang in there - it's gonna be worth it!!

Hi, Lindsay! I agree with the people who said that this is a normal part of the process for a lot of people. They don't call it Bandster "Hell" for no reason!

Just give it some time and do your best to embrace the changes and make them enjoyable. The food thing doesn't have to be torturesome -- it's all about quality vs quantity. So, plan to eat things you really love that aren't crazy fattening. For me, that involved making a bunch of delicious Soups and freezing them in individual containers to get me through lunch at work during the winter (I have a few recipes on my blog that are really yummy, especially the mexican chicken Soup with cheese).

Don't stress too much about exercise. You don't have to be perfect right now. I mean, it's great if you can get that in, too, but if you can only deal with one big change right now, let that be the food one.

Honestly, I love my band. I don't find it to be a burden and, at 8 months post-op (and 47 lbs down), I find that the changes I've made have been so easy to make when compared with how amazing the related benefits have been.

I hope that helps! Hang in there. It will get better.

Catherine

Edited July 6, 200917 yr by Catherine55
Accidentally included original post!