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I want my life back.



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Ok so...I realize....I'm only 19(well in 2 days), but the life I used to have is gone. I've always been a lil tubby...maybe 30lbs overweight. But when I hit high school everything went down hill...by the time I graduated i was 240lbs..by the time I had surgery 265...on my way to 270. I've been looking at pictures of people I graduated with. They're all smiling, happy, thin(at least normal) and I have no pictures. I've hid from anything resembling a camera. I haven't hung out with anyone in a year and a half. I've been miserable. And at 19 I really don't have much of anything to live for...I know that's sounds bad but...it's unfortunately true.

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OMG girlie! First off, you do have so much ahead of you! The fact that you did this surgery is so great! I weighed about the same when I was your age and I WISH I had done this earlier in my life! There is so much that will be happening to you in the next couple of years!! I really hate that you feel that way.... I wish I could meet up with you and really talk! Email me!! Seriously!!

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Hey girl,

I want to tell you that you are someone who is beautiful and uniquely special. You are 19 years old. I would have KILLED to have had lap band at 19. I am now 26 years old and 2 months away from surgery... and everyday that passes I feel like my life is slipping by. But you have something that not very many people get... a second chance. You did the best thing you could do for yourself by getting a handle on your weight while you are still so young. You will have YEARS AND YEARS of amazing times ahead of you. Do let anything take away this special gift that you have been given!

Keep your chin up and remember how special you are!

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Believe it or not, life doesn't end with high school graduation. You now have the opportunity to start a new, better phase of your life, to reinvent yourself--be a prouder, happier person.

My daughter is 27 and was banded two years ago. She doesn't have anything to do with friends from high school anymore, but has a great job, just bought her first house, and has a great new boyfriend. She is a happy, well adjusted person, partially because of her band.

I haven't talked to anyone from high school in 20 years, and I'm not missing them. I moved beyond that time period and have a full and happy life.

My motto is always, "you can't change the past but you can direct the future." You have much more of life ahead of you than behind you. Look forward to it rather than regretting the missed opportunities.

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Count your lucky stars! I feel like I felt all of my teens and 20's overweight and lost out on a lot of experiences. When I turned 30 I decided to have it, and I finally had the surgery a week after my 31st birthday. I am determined, I may have been fat through my 20's but I won't be fat through my 30's!!!

I wish I had this tool at 19. I honestly feel like my life would be VERY different if I had been able to lose weight and keep it off at 19!

You can be so successful with this! Doors will open for you and you have a whole life ahead of you!! Try to keep positive. Soon you will be thinner, and ready to take on the world.

The biggest regret I have is that there are so many things I have not done because I was embarrassed by my weight or unsure of how my body would do. I always wanted to travel abroad, but worried about being perceived as a "fat American." I skipped out on ski trips with friends, and other things that my friends did that I was afraid to do (water ski, snow board, etc.) I did those things as a kid, but in my adult life, never had the guts to do them again! I should have dated more, because I'm still single and haven't had a good, solid long-term relationship in about 6 years! (I do date, but I can't trust people much because I always wonder what they see in me so they are fairly short relationships!) Believe me, you are the perfect age to do this! Take on the world-- please, for me!!

Edited by littlefroggy

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I just want you to know that I felt the EXACT same way after I graduated HS(and still kinda do!). I'm only a few years older than you (Im 22...today..its my bday!) And I just had my surgery 8 days ago (so im still on liquids...doesnt make that great of a bday dinner!) But just think of how GREAT we are going to look soon! We cant ever go back to HS...but try not to focus on that..just think of all the CUTE clothes you will get to buy and how we will be HEALTHY!! Keep your head up! Pretty soon we will be jumping in front of every camera we see instead of running from them! :thumbup:

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Whether you gained weight or not, life after high school is ALWAYS a change. You realize what was once important-isn't anymore. Those you were compatible with, well, sometimes you drift apart.

So don't think it was gaining weight that brought these changes. That could be the cause for you not moving onto the next phase of life, but that's easy to fix. Get out there, build your confidence back up, and enjoy yourself. Your life is going to keep changing a lot in the next few years, believe me.. I'm only 24 and I already can't believe how I thought at 19 hehe.

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Aw, Honey! You have SO much to live for and a whole life ahead of you. Right now, at this very place in time, it looks bleek, but I can promise you this...as silly as it sounds...the sun will come up tomorrow!!

These feelings of grieving for what once was, and possibly even missing those times - when you could 'vegg out' in your room and eat whatever you wanted to stuff the emotions back inside - are perfectly normal (whatever normal is). We've all been there and done that. Take it from someone who knows, it will pass. Just give it a little time.

You've been given a wonderful gift, the chance to make one of the most, if not the most, important changes you will ever make in your life. The chance to start over with a healthy new you. So many people wish they could have had the lap band at your age. Think of it as something to be celebrated. :smile2:

Once the weight starts coming off, you will gain more and more confidence and you will find that there is a huge world and lots of adventures out there just waiting to be had. Ok...I'm off my sappy soap box now. Hang in there!!!! You will be in my prayers. :thumbup:

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I kinda know the feeling, I had to go see another doctor yesterday and I've kind of been ignoring the scales when they weigh me, well yesterday I decided to look and I almost burst out crying, I knew I was 115 or so but in about a month and a half I put on 6-7 kgs so that's basically going from 253 lbs to 267. Like you I've kinda shyed away from friends and everything, mainly because I don't want them to see me the way I am now even though they've known me the entire time like this but I dunno. If you need someone to talk to feel free to message me.

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Hey wish I could have done this a few years earlier. But I didn't become morbidly obese till my late 50's. I was normal weight in high school and I still had kind of a miserable time. I have one eye and well I got picked on for it. I was happy to leave high school, get a job, move into the city make new friends. I only have one friend from high school, she's been my friend since the second grade.

I got a new prosthtic eye, contact leses, dyed my hair blond, Lost 10 lbs LOL back then a lot. Got in shape and had a blast till I met my husband (now that sounds bad LOL) Got married, had a baby, then gained weight slowely till my thyroid went kaputz and messed me up for a few years (undiagnosed). My highest weight was 250. Lost 50 lbs. two years ago in Nutrasystem but gained back till I was 230 again and decided to go for the surgery, I have type II diabetes and sleep apnia. Got approved, had it done and now I am feeling great, able to do things like cross my legs again...hey that is a big deal. I am 60 and looking forward to 20 more years of life.

You have so many years and things will change at 19 you have your chance to shine. When the weight comes off you will feel sooooo good about yourself.

God Bless and take care

Pati

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Oh sweetheart put postitive thoughts all around yourself. You are almost 19 and I am 60, so that means we are at differrent ends of life. I have spent most of my life being heavy. Always 80-100 lbs overweight. I raised my son by myself and worked hard. My first husband left me 'cause I was so fat. Was extremely fortunate to find a man who loved me for who I was, all of me. I too was the one who took the pictures wasn't in them. Almost any diet I've tried and what weight I lost crept back on. Well I went to counselling and learned I was who I was, like it or continue fighting it. My wonderful husband said he loves me the way I am. I realize, for joint problems and other health problems that I need to do something different for my life or my life will take a whole different course (one I don't want.) So next Thursday I will have surgery. YOU have a life ahead of you the YOU can plan it. You get to put the parts where you want them. You have lost weight, congratulations. Keep going, you may slide back a little but stop, think and put YOUR life back on track. YOU can do this, I know you can.

Best of luck

Glenna

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