When I told a "friend" about my desire to look into the Lapband as a tool, She became very angry with me! and almost hateful. She said, i was copping out! along with other hurtful things. She is a ministry major in college. Well I actually began to doubt my thought process, I mean i've prayed about this and all, as I do rely on my Faith for daily decisions..... well a story i heard in Church years ago came to me..... and I wrote it in my Lapband Journal at Home....... i'd like to share the entire entry with you,

~ one day a great flood hit a small town, A man was able to climb onto the roof of his house, the flood Water rose higher and higher.... the man prayed "dear Lord, save me from this flood." twenty minutes later a boy in a Row boat came past, and told the man to get into the boat. The man refused saying "no thank you, I asked God, and I trust that He will save me." The young boy sadly shook his head and left. The water rose higher still, until it was level with the roof. A family came by in a motor boat, again the man refused to get in stating again that God would save him. Finally with the man holding tightly to the chimney, with the water up to his neck, A helicopter came by, dropped a ladder, and told the man to climb on.. once again the man refused. Moments later he was swept away to his death. When he got to Heaven and met with God, He asked God with Anger in his voice .. "God, I trusted you, why didn't you save me?" God looked deeply into his eyes, and said "...... i sent you two boats and a helicopter what more did you want?" ~

Yeah God could make me thinner and healthier over night, I've prayed to God about my weight. I so wish he would just "take it off" for me. God doesn't always work that way, Sometimes He sends boats and helicopters, or sometimes He sends Surgeons and Lapbands!!!!

I loved this thread... I recently went out this weekend with friends and they noticed i'm looking a little thinner because I"M STARVING myself to get the 26 lbs off before surgery. Anyways one of my male friends said you look good keep up the good work... I heard you were considering surgery!!! Please reconsider look in the mirror you have such a beautiful face!! I almost SCREAMED !! Thank you but do u realize I haven't seen my private parts in years ! Do you know I can barley fit in an airplane seat and I travel for my job.. Did you know I have to tell my kids I can't fit in a rollercoaster seat so they have to go themselves. People who have never struggled will never understand but those who truly love me have been exreamly supportive and all the wonderful people on this site make each day easier. Good Luck in your journey.:thumbup:

Thank you for posting this. I really like it. I've been praying all along "Lord, if this be a good thing, then help me get approved". I was approved on Friday and now have a surgery date for August 20th. I do believe it is my life boat.

I'm so sorry your friend was like that with you. I'm sure that hurt. I'm sure some people, for whatever reason, "just don't get it" about a lot of things.

I'm at the very beginning of all this. I'm so glad I found this site ! My first meeting is Aug 12 and I can't wait ! I have only told a few people from my church what I'm looking into, but I knew they would be there for me, I knew they would support me. I've been through a lot medically and other ways since 2000 and my church has seen me through it.

Please don't let her attitude affect you. You are doing what you know you need to do for yourself. God can heal...yes, but God has also given us doctors who can do these awesome procedures for us !

It makes us healthier and we all know that's good !!!! :biggrin2:

being a christian myself and coming from a christian family with a father who is a minister. i have found that it is the "christians" who are always the most neg, nasty, and mean about anything that seems odd or strange or that they simply do not understand. it is a sad fact that there are people out there who just dont get it. i have a sister who at first told me she thought i was cheating but then she changed her mind when she saw how hard it was from the day of surgery to today. a whole whopping 8 days!! now she calls me and sees how i am doing and we are good. i have another sis who when i told i was thinking about it her reaction was to tell me she didnt think it was in my best medical interest:rolleyes2: bc she did a diet and lost like 70 pounds and i did the diet and lost nothing so i obviously didnt do the diet right:blink: she still doesnt know i have had the surgery bc i dont need that right now. i am the youngest of 9 children so i only have 2 siblings in my generation all the others are OLD!!!! (no offense anyone:biggrin:)

so i just think they dont get it.

Thank you for sharing your story. So many of us have gone through the same experience that you have with your friend. If you have made peace with you choice, then that is all that matters.

Thanks for all the wonderful replies. I have accepted my "friends" anger as her own issue and not mine! She has 150lbs to loose, and maybe she is experiencing fear and jealousy about being the "only" fat one in a group when we go some where......... there is comfort in being with another "fat" person. I have long timed learned that the only person in this world that can make me unhappy......is ME! I cannot control someone elses emotions........but I CAN control how i react to these emotions. But i also know, that i need to distance myself from negative people...... and I hope and pray that she finds her path to better health...... my direction is heading toward the lapband!

Sandlily, then I congratulate you on a wise choice. When the time comes when you have lost a good amount of weight, invite your friend to lunch, and show her how wonderful you feel, maybe she will then think about having the Lap Band. She may have read about it and been afraid of ding it. She may just be jealous that you have done it before herself.

I would bring along a few brochures about it and give them to her. She may at that time just be waiting for that little "push" to look into it herself. Best of luck and I love your attitude. Take care.:thumbup::thumbup:

Thank you for the post.. I questioned what the response would be when some of the people at our church found out.. I would normally ask for their prayers when I have the surgery but am debating on that right now because of the type of response that you are getting.. also comments about putting faith in god to help me be strong and have willpower.. I have done that and am still doing that, and will have to continue to do that for the rest of my life. You take miracles where you can get them. I am afraid for my life and of it being cut short because of my health.

You are obviously really hurt by your friends support and mayby hoping she would be a source of strength for you. I would collect my thoughts and approach her again and tell her you were really hurt by her response and see where it was coming from. More often then not people speak without thinking that words can hurt. I am using my own advice at the moment,, after taking sometime to regroup from the sting..

Hope you can work it out!

Trust me, I do know what you mean about people who just don't understand. I have 2 siblings like that and they are 15 years older than me, but you sure can't tell it. I had a very serious medical procedure done in 2005 and they still can't believe my life is better. What do they think had the surgery for.....DUH ! I heard that from a reliable family member, not directly from them. If I would have heard it directly from them, they might have regretted it : )

I'm sorry you're running into that, people can be such rude idiots sometimes. But.....the important thing is you know you have done the right thing, you know it is going to be awesome what the band can do for you ! I don't think too many of us decide to to this on a whim, without trying other things, without really thinking about it. Just know you have lots of friends and support here and as people see the change in you they just might change too, but don't wait on them !!!! Just be yourself and do this for you. :thumbup:

I have found that it is better not to discuss banding with friends and family, as like you I have found people both defensive and aggressive. You do your thing. Life is not a dress rehearsal and you only have one chance to be who and what you want to be. God loves you and if this issue is important to you it is important also to him. He is on your side, not against you. Whatever issues your friend has, let them remain with her. But remember, you don't have to catch every brick that is thrown

Thank you but do u realize I haven't seen my private parts in years ! Do you know I can barley fit in an airplane seat and I travel for my job.. Did you know I have to tell my kids I can't fit in a rollercoaster seat so they have to go themselves. People who have never struggled will never understand :thumbup:

I had to check and see if I wrote this as everything you said I could have (and have) said.

Anyway to the O.P. You're friend was certainly not acting Christian and its definatly not a cop out.

i'm sorry your friend is being so down about your choice. I hope she can realize this is your gift from God to helpyou loose the weight. What does she say to people with pace makers and birth control.......oh God will help your heart, oh God wont let you get pregnant he'll help..

No God gave us free will to make choices and decisions and gave the brilliant doctors and scientist the ability to pro long our lives and help protect us and live a healthier life style...