I would be more than happy to mentor anyone who needs it. There were so many need-a-mentor posts on here that I didn't know who to pick, so I'm putting my availability out there and you guys can let me know if we'd be a good match.

I'm a 36 year old mother of three. I live in rural Kansas, but hopefully not much longer.

I started my band journey at 303 pounds, having peaked at 311 before getting pregnant with my baby #3.

I had surgery in Denver, Colorado, on February 8th, 2008. I have had almost no complications and wake up every day almost giddy about the change this has made in my life.

I've lost 80 pounds as of yesterday and have 63 or so more to go. My approach to the band may be a little different than some, so here's where I'm coming from. I'm very afraid of getting overfilled. I believe that an overfill is the source of so many different problems, I just really want to avoid it. I have that luxury, since at my current restriction I'm still losing weight. I'm not what you'd consider tight. I've been able to eat everything I've tried, even a bagel, or bun. (though those aren't common choices for me.) I'm at 7 ccs in a 10 cc band. I've only had two fills to get me to that point.

I believe in being able to eat a reasonable portion of healthy foods and doing that has helped me be able to lose the weight I have lost so far. I can eat a fairly normal sized plate of food for a meal, so I try hard to make sure I'm making good choices about what that food is. I'm not plagued by constant cravings for junk food, though after my recent two-week vacation, I've had to employ some willpower to get out of the habit of eating less-than healthy foods.

If we sound like we'd be a good match, let me know and we can set up a buddy/mentor situation.

Melissa,

You and I sound like we'd be a perfect match--you just described my exact attitude toward the band, fills, complications, food etc. I started at 275, was banded on July 21st (another one!) and am somewhere around 260ish since starting the pre-op diet on July 14th. I fully expect this loss to stop or even reverse a bit when I start eating "real" food again but I think that's probably natural.

I have done a total life overhaul in conjunction with the band--the way I cook, eat, shop, I even revamped my kitchen and expanded it a bit with a kitchen island extending from the kitchen (a very, very tiny galley kitchen) into the living room a bit, so now I actually have ROOM to cook properly. My largest downfall in gaining weight/not sticking with diets was the "too lazy to cook real food factor", either getting overprocessed crap or takeout.

Anyway, my ultimate goal is to achieve adequate weight loss by restricting food volume alone--not food item choices and I'd rather loose very slowly or stay in a plateau for a long time than get over-full and risk complications. It sounds like you are the same.

Thanks for posting, I look forward to talking with you more :thumbdown:

-Penny

Hi PennyLane!

Nice to make your acquaintance! Congratulations on a good start to your band journey. It's going to be an exciting ride!

In your post you said:

Anyway, my ultimate goal is to achieve adequate weight loss by restricting food volume alone--not food item choices and I'd rather loose very slowly or stay in a plateau for a long time than get over-full and risk complications. It sounds like you are the same.

Maybe you mistyped what you really meant to say, because most of your post I agree with, just not the part in bold.

The above quote is actually not my philosophy on the band, actually it's about the opposite! LOL The part in bold is the part that for me is reversed. I don't believe in restricting the amount you can eat to an extremely small amount. My aim is to be able to eat fairly normal amounts of healthy food, while employing some willpower and thought to making the right eating choices for my body. Sorry, but for me 1/4-1/2 cup of food per meal isn't going to cut it. I eat more like 1-2 cups, depending on the food.

For example, I talked to a friend today who was banded the same day as me. Since her last fill, months ago, she's not been able to tolerate meat, fruit, salad, even Peanut Butter. She is subsisting on Protein shakes and crackers with cheese for the most part. She can eat some veggies. She says she's hungry a lot and wonders if she should get another fill. My advice to her was to get an unfill. I think she's hungry because her band is so full she can't get enough food in to sustain herself. She said she doesn't look healthy, she's got dark circles under her eyes and her hair was falling out. She has lost weight, but in my opinion, there's a better way. I don't think that is how the band was intended to be used.

As far as limiting choices, you have limit choices of inappropriate foods for weight loss. I'm not going to label things as bad or good, because food just is. Some things are a much more appropriate choice for someone who needs to lose weight, as we are. Our bodies will respond as we make choices that are healthy and conducive to weight loss.

I love that you've made a commitment even down to redoing your kitchen to accommodate healthier cooking. It is a total life makeover, at least it has been for me. I think it has to be for one to ultimately be successful at this.

Maybe you can explain more exactly what you meant in your post and if I misunderstood you, or if we're on different pages with our thinking.

Lol, oops...it made sense in my head while I was typing but not now that I re-read it.

I meant that I want the weight loss to come from eating a smaller (not severely smaller, just smaller) amount of healthy food, not from being unable to tolerate certain foods because of a tight band. I basically want to keep all food items (even "bad" ones) available without risking getting stuck, but to use healthy eating and a healthy lifestyle to lose weight, and have the band help to a certain degree with portion control and to a larger degree staying satisfied for longer periods of time.

I agree, that I re-read it, it DOES sound like I said "I want to eat my McDonalds but only half of a portion", when I meant "I want to be physically able to eat any one item I can eat now, choose to do so or not to do so based on nutritional goals and have the band help with portion and hunger issues". I believe in that way, we are the same although I worded it completely insanely :thumbdown:

I never, ever want to be as full as your friend sounds. That is one of my biggest fears, actually, being so tight that I can't eat things that are healthy and tasty foods (specifically meat and salad are my two biggest worries).

I hope I make more sense this time around

Well that made more sense to me. It does sound like we're in agreement. I just think it's a healthier way to approach the band and so far it's working for me.

Melissa - Your advise and theories to Penny are so perfect. I hope to lead the same nutrition lifestyle that you do, with limited restrictions on what I can eat - just healthy and in moderation.

Penny - I think we're July Butterflies together. Thanks for getting that thread started!

Kathy

Hi Melissa - I have a question. Can you describe for me the full or overeat feeling? I'm still on liquids, but yesterday after having some Soup I had this heavy feeling in my chest area along with the need to let out one big burp! Is that what I can expect to feel?

- Kathy

I don't know about the burping part, but yes, the tight or heavy feeling in your chest is kind of what it's going to feel like when you get full. Early on that feeling will last for a while.

As time has passed, I've realized that I often get a full, tight feeling right away and it's usually because I didn't eat slow enough or whatever. It usually passes within a couple of minutes and then I can finish eating my meal and actually get full.

Now I'm at the point where I'm trying to decipher my full signals earlier because I do worry that I might be eating more than I need to. I have yet to eat till I'm in pain (okay, one time early on I did, and that led to my first PB episode.), but sometimes I am uncomfortably full when I'm finished.

At one point I told my friend that I was full, but I wasn't ready to be done eating, so it frustrated me to get full. Now, I often finish what is on my plate. I need to gauge how much to eat by what my body tells me, not my head or my plate.

I do Celebrate the need and the ability to eat reasonable amounts of healthy food. I just need to really understand what a reasonable amount is for me.

Sorry, lots of rambling. I hope some of it was helpful.

Hi Melissa! I am a mom of 4 and getting my band on Aug 27th. I am very happy to read your success and how you are doing it! I think you are doing a very healthy way of eating, I hope I have the same success! My question for you is how do you eat when you are at the table with your kids? Mine are all young and I am finding that it is going to be hard for me to concentrate on what I am eating how much I am chewing while still trying to make them all happy. Do you have any advice?

ok u are my hero...... i would love for u to mentor me.... I need motivation here. It has almost been 3-months since i have been banded and I have lost poss. about 20lbs since banding and tons of inches not sure how many.... my name is Katrina... and i'm sure u have explained in prev. post how u did it so i'm going to read before i ask u any questions...

lamvmomof4,

First of all, congratulations on taking this huge step. As a mom, I really feel that the surgery was as much for my kids as it was for me. They have loved the differences in me and have celebrated in my successes with me.

At first, I didn't eat meals with the family. School was in, so the girls had an easy Breakfast, lunch at school, and daddy would fix dinner. I wasn't at the table with them, hardly ever. After a couple of weeks, I joined them. I would have my bowl of refried Beans, or soup, or whatever, and they would have their dinner. My kids are 10, 8 and 18 months, so I don't have to fuss a whole lot over the older two and their mealtime.

As time has progressed, we eat together and most of the time we eat the same things. I have started cooking healthier fare for the rest of the family as well.

As far as your kids being young, I would almost think that it's going to work better for you to concentrate on feeding them, maybe sit with them and visit with them, and then later, or before, whatever schedule you're on, feed yourself. You will need to concentrate on chewing, etc., especially after your fills and you don't want to end up PBing. Now that I think about it, my second PB was at the dinner table (well, in the bathroom, but you know what I mean) and was because I just wasn't paying attention to how fast I was eating. You'll be able to tell once you're to the point that you can eat without concentrating on every single bite and every time you chew. Eventually you should be able to eat in a fairly normal way with your family.

Did that answer your question, or did I totally miss the mark?

Katrina,

Thanks. You're sweet. Just let me know what specific questions you have. You can read my posts from here, my blog(s), or just ask questions. I'm more than happy to help.

Thanks so much Melissa that answered my question and gave me so insite on how it is going to be!

I totally agree that this is going to be for my family as much as for me! I sick of not having the energy to go play with my kids and do some of the fun things I could do with them if I was smaller.

Thanks so much for your help and I am sure I will be back to ask some more questions after my band date!

Congrats on your great weight loss and healthy eating!

Hello,

I'm having surgery in late September. A little nervous but feel I need to do something drastic. I'm 45 and the mother of 4 children. I know I will need a mentor so if you think we could chat over email, I'd appreciate it.

Congrats on your weight loss. Keep up the good work.

Donna, Rhode Island

Sure, Donna. We can email if you'd like. Send me a private message with your email address in it and we can get started that way.

Shinyhappymommy,

I would love to have you mentor me!! My insurance just approved my surgery. I still need to do my lab work and chest x-ray and then I was told I need to see the Dr. Morganthel for my final weigh in. Would you happen to know approximately how long after the final weigh in you have the surgery? I am so excited about how all this has come together for me!! Thanks for you mentoring skills. Susie