im 1 week out and eating!

[Twilight 2]

This whole process is hard. There isn't one easy part about it. Except maybe choosing chocolate, vanilla, or strawberry Protein shakes. The two weeks before on liquids sucked. The three weeks after on liquids sucked more. Then there was mushies that didn't even smell good. Now there is softs that just taunt with their calories and I can't say no to. This is HARD!

Just because you cheat does not make you a cheater. It isn't WHO you are, it's what you did. If it happens you come here and say I'm dying for good food and I ate it! Then you remember why you are going through all this hell and that you aren't alone. We ALL want to eat. We all want to eat NOW!! That's why we needed the band in the first place. Some of us say "Thank goodness. I did it too." And others say "Come on, you can get through this!" It is all support and we need both types. I need to know I'm not alone and I need someone to tell me to buck up.

There is no reason to feel like you shouldn't state how you feel. We need to learn to be more compassionate and see things through other's eyes. Every post on this board serves a purpose of some sort. It will give another hope or maybe help them understand what they are going through better.

I'm not saying, "Why can't we all just get along." I'm saying we need to take a deep breath, back up, and understand that this is HARD on all of us. I appreciate Heavy's comments. Hell, he has broke the 50 pound mark in less than a month! I also appreciate knowing that I'm not the only one who struggles every day.

If I could do this alone, I wouldn't be here. Would you?

(okay, off my soapbox)

Steph

[Done 2]

This was a good thread until the teacher went and threw a wrench into things.

I empathize with what everybody is writing in this thread - the feelings of hunger, deprivation, etc. It is horrible to go through. If I didn't have this band in me I would have gone back to eating like a horse after the first few days on a diet. That's why I got this band, so I would have that physical barrier to prevent me from binge eating again.

However I disagree with people who think it is acceptable to recommend to another person to eat the next stage of food...or to eat food that is not recommended whatsoever for the initial post-op period. They feel guilty so rather than making things right, they try to gang up with other people and label themselves, i.e. the "cheaters".

-OR-, maybe they don't feel guilty! That's fine! You don't feel guilty? I have a question for you ----- are you self pay?? I am. I have invested a great deal of money into this procedure. Maybe I appreciate this surgery more than others?

To brush everything off like no big deal when others question why they are doing what they are doing is shocking. Almost like putting your fingers in your ears and yelling "LA LA LA LA LAA I'M NOT LISTENING!" when what you might hear would be helpful and, quite possibly, make you understand WHY what you are doing is detrimental to your band & stomach.

I value everybody's opinion on this board, good or bad. I enjoyed participating in this discussion and I hope we can all continue to be supportive of each other, and kick each other's a**es if we mess up again.

[~Sheila~ 0]

Well as Im not picking sides here, at all....here's my thoughts...

I think the reason some people advise others to do something maybe their Dr didnt tell them to do, or eat something they shouldnt, or go to the next phase, is....because on here, we see SO many different recommendations from different dr's and people. Like how long to be on liquids...ect...and i think, "Well if its ok for so and so, then why not for me?" so for me, i think, "oh it cant be THAT bad if this dr's recommending it" ect...

With so many different guidelines from our Dr's, i think its hard to say what is "right" or "Wrong" since everyone seems to be different...I cant help but to think sometimes, "Is my dr too strict?" "how can it be so bad if so and so's loosing weight and eating solids."

know what i mean?

[girlygirlz 0]

Yes Sheila you emphasized what I talked about. The Dr.s are all different. I don't think that most of the people on this thread have gone crazy and eaten everything in sight. Some people will experiment a little and while it may not be a good idea to push things I just think it is human nature. Roberta, I think it is great that you are self pay but every one here went through sacrifices to get the surgery. I still ended up paying a big chunk out of pocket for my surgery as well as going through five months of hoops from the time I went to my first seminar to when I was banded. I was fortunate to have my insurance pay but I would have found a way to do it without insurance too.

[InTheCityGirl 0]

I guess this is such a touchy topic and I'm on the fence.

I too am self-pay. In fact I had to wait a year to get my band. I have read about the slipped bands, flipped ports, and possible stretched pouches for months.

On the one hand, hearing that I'm not the only one who fell off the wagon gives me some piece of mind that I haven't destroyed my band, thus helping me get back on the wagon.

On the other hand, hearing that cheating has no real consequences by stories of people who do it is possibly dangerous for some of us over-eaters who can not control their addiction. There exists the possibility that we may just ignore all advice, good judgement and prudence. This would make the band totally useless OR fail and removed.

I think someone telling us to get back on the wagon is a good voice. food addiction is like any other addiction: if an Alcoholic has a drink, AA encourages them to start again today. Today is a new day type stuff.

Taking care of ourselves and our bands is the same. We may do something we shouldn't be doing but we need to get back on the wagon.

This is not in my mind a section of the forum to teach each other how to cheat but support each other after the fact to get back on the wagon:-)))))

[Twilight 2]

CityGirl,

You say it well. Thank's for the level head.

This is a touchy subject and we are all very raw emotionally right now. We get our hackles up very quickly. Our bodies are going nuts with what we are forcing them to do I guess.

A fresh day and a fresh perspective today tells me that I'm going to be okay today. i'm going to stay on-plan and I'm going to be good to myself because of it. I hope you all can be strong today.

I'm Stephanie and I'm an overeater!

Steph

[A-band-on-me 0]

I had my surgery on 12/17/07 and I ate a tiny bit at my office holiday party on 12/21/07. I was walking around the mall on 12/20/07. I could not simply drink Clear Liquids and eat sugar free Jello. The good news is that I tolderrated the surgery really well. I PROBABLY could have gone to work like two days later. The bad news is that I got hungry relatively fast.

I am really careful with what I am eating now but I am eating food. Maybe I have a stomach like a billy goat but I am tolerating everything pretty easily. Also looking forward to my first fill in about 4 weeks.

I am down 10 lbs from surgery date and 27 lbs down from pre-surg diet.

I am not saying what I am doing is right; it isn't. But I really couln't just do liquids anymore.

Good luck everyone.

[Done 2]

Thanks everybody for replying. Sheila I agree with you, that makes sense. Even my own surgeon and the hospital nutritionist have completely different recommendations. It's frustrating.

Sixth day on fluids and I am soooooooo wishing I could eat real food.

If I followed my nutritionist's advice, tomorrow I could start to have creamed Soups, Protein shakes, milk, yogurt, and pudding. I just don't know what to do.

[Northern Mist 2]

I'm scared to death not to follow my surgeons advice. How would you know if your stomache's OK after cheating at day 4?? or 14???

I thought the initial liquid stage was so that your stomache wouldn't wiggle around trying to process food and possibly tearing stitches or stretching etc..... It's supposed to basically lay as dormant as possible to give your body time to heal. Regardless of what's paid and how, I'm scared I'll do damage no money will fix.

[Northern Mist 2]

Silly me - Everyone has pretty much said the same thing. I promise to read back a little farther before I'm moved to put my two cents in

[Success in lapband 0]

Lets all Celebrate our successes

And I definately think that eating only 1 piece of pizza verses the whole damn thing is a HUGE success! Congratulations on that NSV (and sharing it)!

I also think that not gaining this week (but not losing either) is another huge success.

I think these are successes BECAUSE it is in the direction of my goal, it may not be the bulls eye right this moment but it is FAR closer than it was 8-12 weeks ago.

Some days the glass is 1/2 empty and some days the glass is 1/2 full. Seriously it REALLY depends on how satiated (hungry) I am at that moment.

Life is always so much sweeter when I am not hungry and when I am hungry the sweetest smelling rose stinks!

Lighten up on yourselves, slow and easy. WOW!!!!!

Obviously some of us is experiencing alot of hunger right now.

[Deena716 0]

Hi guys! Well my surgery date was 12/6. I was doing so great, but now, I'm so disappointed in myself. I've been eating every since Christmas. I don't eat as much as I used to of course, but I was still eating the SAME bad foods through the holidays. One good thing is I have been hitting the Wii action games a lot more. In fact, I'm getting ready to play some DDR on my Wii right now!

Hey guys, if you don't like exercise, I highly recommend getting one of these games. It comes with "Wii Sports" which has bowling, boxing (my two favs), amongst other great games that make you forget you are exercising.

My next appt is 1/15. I hope I get a FILL! God knows!!!!!!

[IndioGirl55 32]

I was reading your thread this morning - and you guys don't need to start fighting between yourself - this is your support thread and support doesn't meaning saying it's ok when it's not.

Here is some advice from an experienced bander

I for one can eat anything I want - I have restriction - I choose to eat healthy - lots of fish (I like it) veggies - brown rice etc. IMHO the band is a great tool - but it's only that - a tool - the band its self isn't going to make you lose weight - only you can do that by choosing healthy foods - you can't keep eating high fat - high sugar foods - the band will let you eat these things and if you choose to continue to eat in this manner you aren't going to be a band success story. IMHO 75% of the work is up to you and the other 25% is the bands job once you get proper restriction

It was stated if you could do this pre-band then you wouldn't need the band - to a point I agree as the band is a Portion Control device but that’s all it is - you control the calories - if you want to be successful you have to make a commitment to changing your eating habit and add exercise into your life. It's not that one piece of cake that made you fat - it was eating the whole damn thing. You can still have cake, candy, fried foods - but only occasionally - not ever day. You have to allow wiggle room (not room enough for another person) to live a normal life - but you have to retrain your brain too.

The band is no diff than any other program out there - Some will succeed on WW - Jenny Craig - LA Weight - Bypass & Lapland surgery - but there are those who didn't continue with their commitment to change their eating habits and they will not succeed. Again this is my personal opinion formed from the data on the band and bypass - there are people out there that were either banded or had bypass and have put all the weight they lost back on - Why - did the surgery fail (they would like you to believe that it did - but it didn't - the tool worked) it was the person who chose to go back to their unhealthy eating habits. Plain and simple

Please make a determined effort to comply with your band and the eating plan that your doctor has given you Each Doc's instructions are different - and each patient must follow their doctors instructions

.

It's great that you are only eating 1 slice of pizza instead of the whole thing - but IMHO this is a lifetime lifestyle change and you can't just rely on the band - you need to learn a new healthy way of eating in combination with the restriction if you are going to be successful in the long run.

As fat people we have BAD eating habits - these eating habits have to change. You have to do some of the work too by making healthy food choices and adding exercise.

We does understand how hard this is – we have been there - we knows it's hard to refrain from eating a hamburger when you have been on liquids for so long.

Sometime some of us just don't understand why people who go through all the hassle of surgery - don't take things seriously - that they don't understand that they are going to have to work at this.

I am a fat chick too - I know all the excuses why we can't do thing - it's just too hard - that why you were banded to have the tool to help (operative word help not do it for you)

You do have to work - and we want you to succeed - we really do.

I am working this - and I feel so much better - and We want this for all of you - we want you to have the "aha" moment..

We aren't perfect - but we understand that we have to change our old mindset and do the work - we want you all to understand this too.

You will find alot of us banders giving tough love - we aren't going to sugar coat it - You need to step up to the plate and take responsibility for yourself

You wanted sympathy, but what you NEEDED was someone to tell you the truth.

We have all cheated all our lives - and that's why we are fat - You aren't going to die if you don't have that cookie - but if you choose to keep eating them you will..

Good Luck on your journies - You can do this !!!

[salsa1877 10]

Amen to Janet. In reality, we have been reading your responses and were so concerned that we really wanted to add our thoughts in here. There is NO way that I would be as successful as I have been without my lapband family. I actually post on both the July and August boards because I know that I needed help. I have been a very independent person my whole life and it took a lot for me to come and get the advice, help and support that I need. It is very humbling to finally admit that I NEEDED help. Don't burn bridges within your group, someday you may really need them.

So I have read most of this thread and I do think that some of you need tough love. Yes some people need to be comforted, but I don't think that the two are mutually exclusive. I am not going to tell you that I think it is good that you are eating after 1 week of surgery. I will tell you that I think that it is good that you are not eating as much as you did in the past, but there are rules out there for a reason. I asked my doctor why some have certain rules and why others have completely different rules. He said some of it is based on their traning and some of it is based on their techniques used. So doctor's have their rules for a reason and what one doctor says may NOT be worth listening too because of the techniques that your doctor uses. Support sometimes does mean telling someone that what they are doing is counterproductive and sometimes downright dangerous. I fully believe that once you are on to regular foods that you need to live life like a thin person. A cookie, A piece of cake, A piece of pie is alright once in a while. But instead of living for the moments to have that piece of food, learn to embrace what you can have. This band is not some new year's resolution that we make and if we fail oh well there is always next year. This is a lifestyle change and YOU have to make it. Your doctor, your spouse, your friends can support you but they can't make the change.

This healing time is not just for healing your stomach and the incisions, but it is also a time to start healing your mind. We had major surgery for goodness sakes. There had to be something in our minds that have caused us to want to take this step. For me it was that I didn't want to end up dead like my mom at age 53. I was on the express train to the ill fate if I hadn't changed anything. As you can see from my signature, I have been very successful. What is my secret? GIVE UP THE EXCUSES AND STOP BLAMING EVERYONE ELSE. Last night after reading the posts here, I sat and contimplated for a long time what was making me successful, and I finally came to the conclusion that it was because I stopped making excuses. Could I have justified eating right after surgery? Yep... I was 5 hours away from home and hungry. I was staying at my brother's house where I had NO TV, NO RADIO, NO PHONE, NO INTERNET and he works 16+ hours a day. But I decided that was no excuse for eating. Could I have chosen to not exercise? Yep...I work VERY long hours and in a very stressful environmnet. But again, not a good enough excuse.

Please take this opportunity to reflect on the reason you had this surgery and determine what excuses you are ready to give up in order to have the life you WANT. If you feel like you need some tough love, please PM me or visit us at the July and August band. I love my band, but more than anything, I love the new me. I love the choices I am making and I love the fact that I take complete responsibility for my actions. The restriction from the band has been more liberating than anything I have every experienced.

[girlygirlz 0]

Thanks for all your input but I am soo done with this thread! Too depressing to be honest and too preachy! I am doing great with my weight loss and wish you all the best.