Whole lot of pre-op concerns..

[mousecat88 2,279]

Having gastric bypass on 11/1/2018. I got approved for my surgery within 3 months and NO weight loss prior to was required. I've actually gained 10 lbs because I've been eating "all the things I won't be able to have" over the last month. My surgeon doesn't seem to care, though, and says I'll lose it in the 2 weeks leading up to surgery on the pre-op diet. I start the pre-op semi-liquid diet on October 16th. I am 29 yrs old, 5'3" and 280lbs. I don't have any comorbidities except a questionable diagnosis of pseudotumor.

I am worrying for a few reasons...

My biggest worry at the moment is the shakes. I LOVED the whey shakes, especially nectar. But, turns out, I am highly intolerant to whey - it makes me want to vomit. I have been desperately searching for a tolerable substitute. I like AdvantEdge, but that is the only one I've found so it's limiting. I tried egg Protein and it tastes like raw egg and tootsie rolls and I tried pea protein and it tastes like Bailey's with sand in it (lol). I need GOOD soy options aside from AdvantEdge and I am really struggling.

Now it's beginning to REALLY hit me how much food plays a role in every day life. Not just for overweight/obese people, but in society in general. I never really considered it until now... 11 days from never being able to truly enjoy the foods I do now. I am scared that I will have the surgery, won't get to the weight I hope to get to, and will have rearranged my intestines to the point where I am still fat and now I can't even enjoy my favorite foods. I keep thinking that if I fail, this is irreversible, and I've done something traumatic to my body and potentially be setting myself up to being sick constantly. I think that if I'm going to unsuccessful, I may as well have left myself alone so I can be fat and still stuff my face. lol.

I was also told I won't have an issue with sagging skin. I don't see how that is even possible. When I was 140lbs I had saggy skin and I've had stretch marks since I was 10 years old. I've started squirreling away money for cosmetic surgery in two years. That's my least concern, though.

I guess I am just worried about failure. To take such a drastic step and it still not work out the way I had hoped, or some horrible complication occur.... I don't know how I could cope.

Rant over now... lol.

[Matt Z 4,138]

41 minutes ago, mousecat88 said:

Having gastric bypass on 11/1/2018. I got approved for my surgery within 3 months and NO weight loss prior to was required. I've actually gained 10 lbs because I've been eating "all the things I won't be able to have" over the last month. My surgeon doesn't seem to care, though, and says I'll lose it in the 2 weeks leading up to surgery on the pre-op diet. I start the pre-op semi-liquid diet on October 16th. I am 29 yrs old, 5'3" and 280lbs. I don't have any comorbidities except a questionable diagnosis of pseudotumor.

I am worrying for a few reasons...

My biggest worry at the moment is the shakes. I LOVED the whey shakes, especially nectar. But, turns out, I am highly intolerant to whey - it makes me want to vomit. I have been desperately searching for a tolerable substitute. I like AdvantEdge, but that is the only one I've found so it's limiting. I tried egg Protein and it tastes like raw egg and tootsie rolls and I tried pea Protein and it tastes like Bailey's with sand in it (lol). I need GOOD soy options aside from AdvantEdge and I am really struggling.

Now it's beginning to REALLY hit me how much food plays a role in every day life. Not just for overweight/obese people, but in society in general. I never really considered it until now... 11 days from never being able to truly enjoy the foods I do now. I am scared that I will have the surgery, won't get to the weight I hope to get to, and will have rearranged my intestines to the point where I am still fat and now I can't even enjoy my favorite foods. I keep thinking that if I fail, this is irreversible, and I've done something traumatic to my body and potentially be setting myself up to being sick constantly. I think that if I'm going to unsuccessful, I may as well have left myself alone so I can be fat and still stuff my face. lol.

I was also told I won't have an issue with sagging skin. I don't see how that is even possible. When I was 140lbs I had saggy skin and I've had stretch marks since I was 10 years old. I've started squirreling away money for cosmetic surgery in two years. That's my least concern, though.

I guess I am just worried about failure. To take such a drastic step and it still not work out the way I had hoped, or some horrible complication occur.... I don't know how I could cope.

Rant over now... lol.

If you have ANY lactose intolerance, stay away from any protein that contains Protein Concentrate. Find yourself a protein that ONLY has Protein Isolate. Like Isopure for instance. Whey Protein concentrate is exactly what it sounds like, it's a concentrated milk protein, but concentrates do not filter out lactose. Isolates remove most, if not all, lactose.

You are looking at things the wrong way. Saying you'll NEVER be able to do something is wrong... very wrong. Quite a high number of Bypass patients, myself included, have almost no issues with almost all foods. I can eat pretty much what I want at this point, just over 6 months post op. I drink beer, eat sweets, etc. No issues. I had 2 donuts the other day and that made me feel like crap, but no dumping or other issues other than feeling super run down and icky for a few.

If you focus on ways you plan to fail, you will fail.
Focus on the things you can switch out. I'm a huge ice cream guy. I could eat a whole pint and want more. I found Halo Top ice creams, protein, no added sugar, low fat, super low calories and they taste good.

I don't eat white flour anymore, I choose to eat the high grain count stuff or fiberone has an 80 calorie wrap.

Look for the things that you can swap out, and that will satisfy the cravings while still falling inside of your diet restrictions. It's not hard, you just have to do a little bit of work at first.

Revision from Band to Bypass was legit the best thing I've ever done. I'm still dealing with some odd body dysmorphia, I still "feel" fat. Like when I'm not paying attention, my spacial awareness is that of my fat body... but I'm not "fat" anymore, so that's an odd thing to deal with. But it's getting better day by day. I don't have any issues with feeling like I'm missing out on food or anything, we still go out to eat, I just pick better items. Your taste buds will change, some folks they change only for a little while, some, forever. I've lost my craving for super sweet things, for the most part.

With sagging skin, my max weight was 370 and I don't have much sagging skin at all... I've got some, but it's totally hidden with clothing.

The bypass is reversible. It's risky, but it happens. The **ONLY** weight loss surgery that isn't reversible is the sleeve, because the sleeve 90% of your stomach is removed, with the bypass, it's all still there, just shifted around.

The other side is to realize that, food addictions are real, even if you don't believe you are addicted to something, doesn't mean you aren't. Some of it is habit, habits take a minimum of 2 weeks to break.

Why do you want the surgery? You don't have to answer here, but keep that in mind whenever you start to get frustrated or sad at things that... more than likely won't bother you later down the road.

I knew that if I didn't do something to lose the weight, I would be cutting my life MUCH shorter... I don't want to do that to my wife and kids.

I'll tell you this. over 90 lbs dropped since March and I feel fantastic. Food does not drive my life, I still enjoy lots of food items, I can hike without issue, I take several flights of stairs without breaking a sweat, I actually did 8 floors of a Federal Hospital in 1 go, just because I wanted to see if I could do it, and my heart rate got to a whopping 121 bpm. I'm prepping now to climb a mountain.... I wouldn't even have been able to entertain the idea 6 months ago.

It's ok and totally understandable to be afraid, scared and unsure of the future and all the changes that WILL be required with this surgery. But one thing is certain, if someone stays overweight, they are guaranteeing they will have medical issues down the road.

Edited October 4, 2018 by Matt Z

[Ed_NW 684]

I'm pre-op for RNYGP as well. Researching something that I'm uncomfortable with puts my mind at ease. The fact that you are on here looking for answers is a step in the right direction. Start binge watching other people's stories on YouTube. You will find that pretty much everybody starts out with the same doubts and concerns. It's a common story. You will have tons of physiological hurtles to overcome within the first year post-op just like you're having pre-op. From what I've noticed, 99% of the time ( not sure of the exact % hehe ), after 1 yr post-op, people are very happy and wonder why they didn't do it sooner.

[mousecat88 2,279]

52 minutes ago, Matt Z said:

If you have ANY lactose intolerance, stay away from any Protein that contains Protein Concentrate. Find yourself a protein that ONLY has Protein Isolate. Like Isopure for instance. Whey Protein concentrate is exactly what it sounds like, it's a concentrated milk protein, but concentrates do not filter out lactose. Isolates remove most, if not all, lactose.

I am intolerant to both the concentrate and the isolates. I can't have either. It's the actual protein itself. nectar, Bariatric Advantage, Pure Protein, Quest, etc, are all isolates and I can't have them.

Sometimes I think I want surgery simply because I think it will be a "quick fix" and solve my issues without me having to work at overcoming my mentality. I was 140lbs just 9 years ago. I still haven't even gotten used to the idea of me being fat.. when I think of myself in my head, I still see 140lb me. When I was 140lbs, I had very, very low self-esteem and had MASSIVE liposuction done. I did not have any dietitian, therapy, or trainer support. I became addicted to Protein Shakes (which, oddly, didn't bother me at all back then) and gained 30lbs within 4 months of surgery. I got really depressed and gained 150lbs over the last decade. At first it was emotional eating... now I eat because I always feel hungry and have severe cravings. The liposuction was the worst mistake I ever made... thinking it would be a quick fix for my self-esteem. I worry I am thinking along the same lines again for this surgery.

I sometimes wonder if I could just lose the weight by myself if I just stuck to the diet change. I lost 60lbs by myself within 5 months last year, but got tired of eating healthy and started eating garbage again. If I just kept to my healthy eating, I probably WOULD be down 100lbs by now. I question if I am doing this for the right reasons.

I don't have kids, and I just broke up with my bf of 5 years for several reasons... one being that he was insecure about the prospect of me losing weight and assumed I would leave him once I was thin. My mother considers this elective surgery and tells me I am mutilating myself. She recently has stopped berating my choice, but she is not actually supportive. My friends seem indifferent. I am pretty much alone.

Edited October 4, 2018 by mousecat88

[Matt Z 4,138]

Just now, mousecat88 said:

Sometimes I think I want surgery simply because I think it will be a "quick fix" and solve my issues without me having to work at overcoming my mentality.

This surgery is anything but a quick fix, it's a forced habit change.

Have you had your psychological work up yet? I'm not a doctor by any stretch of the word and I certainly don't play one on TV, nor have I stayed at a super8 last night... but it sounds like this might not be the best choice for you, it's something you need to understand is going to require work, and change. And that work and change is going to have to be permanent, or you'll end up rebounding and gaining the weight back. It's not a quick fix, nor is it "easy". All Weight Loss Surgeries are tools, it's up to you on how you use that tool. If you respect it, and treat it right, it'll work with you and everything will be all sunshine and rainbows. If you don't, you can end up regaining, or worse, causing blockages, or a slew of other issues that can arise if you don't stay within your new diet restrictions. A slight venture outside of the diet every now and again is fine... I do it. But totally giving up and caving in... will only result in the surgery being another waste of money.

You have to **WANT** to change.

Then... you have to **ACTUALLY** change.

That's what WLS is for, for those that WANT to change and need the help.

[mousecat88 2,279]

2 minutes ago, Matt Z said:

This surgery is anything but a quick fix, it's a forced habit change.

Have you had your psychological work up yet? I'm not a doctor by any stretch of the word and I certainly don't play one on TV, nor have I stayed at a super8 last night... but it sounds like this might not be the best choice for you, it's something you need to understand is going to require work, and change. And that work and change is going to have to be permanent, or you'll end up rebounding and gaining the weight back. It's not a quick fix, nor is it "easy". All Weight Loss Surgeries are tools, it's up to you on how you use that tool. If you respect it, and treat it right, it'll work with you and everything will be all sunshine and rainbows. If you don't, you can end up regaining, or worse, causing blockages, or a slew of other issues that can arise if you don't stay within your new diet restrictions. A slight venture outside of the diet every now and again is fine... I do it. But totally giving up and caving in... will only result in the surgery being another waste of money.

You have to **WANT** to change.

Then... you have to **ACTUALLY** change.

That's what WLS is for, for those that WANT to change and need the help.

Yes, I am completely cleared for surgery from all parties. I have clearance from both my personal psychiatrist and the psychiatrist from the hospital. I WANT to be 140lbs again. I just worry that something will go wrong and it will be another case of "bad liposuction"... where I didn't follow through with what I was supposed to and gained a ton of weight. Or, something goes horribly wrong... which no one can predict. I like to think I have it in me to commit to the lifestyle change... but I also know my own history and I don't know where my "rock bottom" is to give me that genuine motivation to succeed. I, like probably everyone else, have had so many failures in the past with weight loss that I worry this will be another one. Or maybe not. Maybe it will all be fantastic and I won't have cravings or feelings of constant hunger and food will be just another thing I need to live and nothing more.

[Frustr8 7,886]

Only you can answer that. The fact you are here shows you realize few, if. anyone can do it without some interventions. I am old as the hills, I have subjected myself to some downright weird diet plans, because I was desperate to lose weight, tired of people treating me like a second-class citizen, which is how obese people are treated. I got weary of people telling me I was lazy, unmotivated, uncommited, that I desired to look the way I did. And the older you get the worse the slings and arrows get, you have people telling you that you are a waste of space, you have cornered too much of the world's food , people are dying in the South Sudan because of you and you alone.
Only you know if you have reached a breaking point. I stood it a lot longer than I should have, I was taught to repect others, to not make wavesm The fact they didn't respect me didn't seem part of the equation. But we all reach out own Rubicon. If you have, seek surgery, use your surgery for the good of you, and live health at a weight you desire. If you don't I still wish you well. Everybody has to live their life.

[mousecat88 2,279]

Honestly, and this sounds really stupid... but I am really, really upset at the Protein Shake issue I am having. lol. I LOVED the Syntrax Nectar shakes so much but have constant nausea. Now since I am drinking the most horrible shakes ever, in my head I am telling myself this is all I will be able to ingest. I think if I could have some tasty shakes, this wouldn't seem so daunting. I honestly may just say whatever and drink the whey isolates and feel nauseous all the time simply so I don't have to have the horrible pea or egg Protein. I don't know. It's frustrating.

[Matt Z 4,138]

3 minutes ago, mousecat88 said:

Yes, I am completely cleared for surgery from all parties. I have clearance from both my personal psychiatrist and the psychiatrist from the hospital. I WANT to be 140lbs again. I just worry that something will go wrong and it will be another case of "bad liposuction"... where I didn't follow through with what I was supposed to and gained a ton of weight. Or, something goes horribly wrong... which no one can predict. I like to think I have it in me to commit to the lifestyle change... but I also know my own history and I don't know where my "rock bottom" is to give me that genuine motivation to succeed. I, like probably everyone else, have had so many failures in the past with weight loss that I worry this will be another one. Or maybe not. Maybe it will all be fantastic and I won't have cravings or feelings of constant hunger and food will be just another thing I need to live and nothing more.

This is going to fall 100% on your shoulders then.
Don't fail.
Let the past be the past and do not allow it to define your future.
These are things that YOU alone control.
You can either resolve to be better... or you can keep falling back on the past.

Only 1 thing is going to help you here.

[mousecat88 2,279]

I'm going to look back at this in 6 months and wonder why I was stressing myself out so much.

[Frustr8 7,886]

Only you can answer that. The fact you are here shows you realize few, if. anyone can do it without some interventions. I am old as the hills, I have subjected myself to some downright weird diet plans, because I was desperate to lose weight, tired of people treating me like a second-class citizen, which is how obese people are treated. I got weary of people telling me I was lazy, unmotivated, uncommited, that I desired to look the way I did. And the older you get the worse the slings and arrows get, you have people telling you that you are a waste of space, you have cornered too much of the world's food , people are dying in the South Sudan because of you and you alone.
Only you know if you have reached a breaking point. I stood it a lot longer than I should have, I was taught to repect others, to not make wavesm The fact they didn't respect me didn't seem part of the equation. But we all reach out own Rubicon. If you have, seek surgery, use your surgery for the good of you, and live health at a weight you desire. If you don't I still wish you well. Everybody has to live their life.

[mousecat88 2,279]

Woke up this morning feelings the complete opposite - super positive and motivated again. I think it's just going to be a crazy ride over the next 3 weeks of wishy-washiness.

[jasmineinmymind 204]

On 10/4/2018 at 11:14 AM, mousecat88 said:

I'm going to look back at this in 6 months and wonder why I was stressing myself out so much.

Im wondering what you worried about that didnt turn out to be a huge issue?

[jyta 8]

If you have ANY lactose intolerance, stay away from any Protein that contains Protein Concentrate. Find yourself a protein that ONLY has Protein Isolate. Like Isopure for instance. whey Protein concentrate is exactly what it sounds like, it's a concentrated milk protein, but concentrates do not filter out lactose. Isolates remove most, if not all, lactose.

You are looking at things the wrong way. Saying you'll NEVER be able to do something is wrong... very wrong. Quite a high number of Bypass patients, myself included, have almost no issues with almost all foods. I can eat pretty much what I want at this point, just over 6 months post op. I drink beer, eat sweets, etc. No issues. I had 2 donuts the other day and that made me feel like crap, but no dumping or other issues other than feeling super run down and icky for a few.

If you focus on ways you plan to fail, you will fail.
Focus on the things you can switch out. I'm a huge ice cream guy. I could eat a whole pint and want more. I found Halo Top ice creams, protein, no added sugar, low fat, super low calories and they taste good.

I don't eat white flour anymore, I choose to eat the high grain count stuff or fiberone has an 80 calorie wrap.

Look for the things that you can swap out, and that will satisfy the cravings while still falling inside of your diet restrictions. It's not hard, you just have to do a little bit of work at first.

Revision from Band to Bypass was legit the best thing I've ever done. I'm still dealing with some odd body dysmorphia, I still "feel" fat. Like when I'm not paying attention, my spacial awareness is that of my fat body... but I'm not "fat" anymore, so that's an odd thing to deal with. But it's getting better day by day. I don't have any issues with feeling like I'm missing out on food or anything, we still go out to eat, I just pick better items. Your taste buds will change, some folks they change only for a little while, some, forever. I've lost my craving for super sweet things, for the most part.

With sagging skin, my max weight was 370 and I don't have much sagging skin at all... I've got some, but it's totally hidden with clothing.

The bypass is reversible. It's risky, but it happens. The **ONLY** weight loss surgery that isn't reversible is the sleeve, because the sleeve 90% of your stomach is removed, with the bypass, it's all still there, just shifted around.
The other side is to realize that, food addictions are real, even if you don't believe you are addicted to something, doesn't mean you aren't. Some of it is habit, habits take a minimum of 2 weeks to break.

Why do you want the surgery? You don't have to answer here, but keep that in mind whenever you start to get frustrated or sad at things that... more than likely won't bother you later down the road.

I knew that if I didn't do something to lose the weight, I would be cutting my life MUCH shorter... I don't want to do that to my wife and kids.

I'll tell you this. over 90 lbs dropped since March and I feel fantastic. Food does not drive my life, I still enjoy lots of food items, I can hike without issue, I take several flights of stairs without breaking a sweat, I actually did 8 floors of a Federal Hospital in 1 go, just because I wanted to see if I could do it, and my heart rate got to a whopping 121 bpm. I'm prepping now to climb a mountain.... I wouldn't even have been able to entertain the idea 6 months ago.

It's ok and totally understandable to be afraid, scared and unsure of the future and all the changes that WILL be required with this surgery. But one thing is certain, if someone stays overweight, they are guaranteeing they will have medical issues down the road.

Thank you! I'm having rny on 15th Jan! Same feelings and fears... but much better now[emoji3]

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