Christ on a cracker! I'm having gastric bypass surgery in 2 weeks after going through a 6 month weight loss program. Damn, I never thought I'd find myself here. I mean WTF? I am having my entire guts rearranged just to get my weight under control. Sometimes it just seems ridiculous.

So, grizzled veterans, what's the run down on your coping strategies? Do not tell me that you discovered a new-found love of exercise and that you just *like* go for a run when you are stressed and tired. For real, what are you doing?

I mean, we go to all these classes and dredge up all our bullshit so ALL THE THINGS are simmering just under the surface and then our coping mechanism is ripped out from under us at the same time. I feel like a battered and bruised ball of sensitivity after talking about and trying to deal with self image, denial, abuse, etc. Then, the one thing that has always been reliable, has always worked for me (temporarily!) is not the thing anymore. The glass of wine, the pint of ice cream, the latte and scone with your BFF, the lasagna at mom's, BUH-BYE!

I don't want to make it sound like I'm not doing the work; this is the first time in ages I've looked forward to the upcoming year. I've worked hard at breaking some of my worst habits: Fast food, eating in front of the TV, snacking after the kids go to bed - THE WORST ONE - checkity check! I've even lost 20 lbs because I'm fk-ing serious about this. But, damn, what now?

I can't help but wonder...will I ever find my healthy coping mechanisms?

Edited August 3, 20188 yr by Naughty Glitter Goddess
i don't know what i'm doing

11 hours ago, Orchids&Dragons said:

No matter how hard I've worked out, I swear I have never met an endorphin! Might as well be a unicorn that farts rainbows!

I did, a few times... Not always but when it happens... Magical

On 03/08/2018 at 11:20 PM, DaleCruse said:

I'm going to respectfully challenge this entire premise. food hasn't worked FOR you (or me, or pretty much anyone). If it did work for you, you wouldn't pursue weight loss surgery. Instead, realize that food has been working AGAINST you. It's a huge source of stress for you.

The good news is you're soon going to set that huge source of stress aside. You're going to develop other, much more healthy, coping mechanisms. We don't know what that will be for you, but we'll be cheering you on as you discover it.

Good luck. You are not alone.

Thank you so much for this comment. This has really helped me. I have decided to go ahead with surgery and am in the preliminary discussions to move this forward. I am feeling very fearful, very worried about not having food to turn to and have never been so emotional. You are so right about food and how unhelpful and negative it has been. Hopefully I will finally find new and healthy ways of dealing with my emotions. It’s a very scary thought though.

I've been in a bariatric program since May. Got everything done on my checklist....one problem ; not making weight. They have you do south beach diet. O.k. been doing that since January. Losing 1-2#/month. My God , this will take forever. Have to loose 14#. So frustrating. I've always lost or maintained, can I get credit for that?? Lol.

Naughty Glitter Goddess, I hope to rejoin the Sexual Revolution once it get down to an approximate figure. At 72 I hope I is like riding a horse or bicycle, once you learn home the knowzledge is there FOREVER!
LOL ??

Dratted phone- once you know how,you can do it forever! How did i know Android Marshmallow is self-censoring?

I would say for the first year cravings were not a big deal for me and I was basking in a sea of praise and support. Then I hit the end of my weight loss and things got more difficult. That being said at four years out, I’m two to five pounds up from my lowest point.
It’s hard work.
I walk five -7 days in the summer and struggle to walk five in the winter. This last school year I was bombarded with temptation and gave in too many times. But, I held myself accountable if you gain a couple of pounds you have to work on losing it again.
Work the plan. High protein low carb and what ever calorie restriction your doctor calls for.
Make a routine of exercise and keep track even on the bad days and have a support group or person.
But you can do it .

On 08/03/2018 at 21:02, Naughty Glitter Goddess said:

Man, you hit the nail on the head here. I did make a list of all the things that my weight was keeping me from enjoying back at the begining of this process several months ago. I'm going to revisit that tonight and hopefully brainstorm some things I can do as I'm recovering. My biggest goal is getting back to my travels - I haven't been overseas in ages because of airline seats. I can't wait to get back to it. I may actually get started planning that first trip for a year or two from now

If you can swing it don’t wait a year. I had a surprise international work trip at week 11 post op. I was able to add some vacation to it too. Holy Moley did it help to have a whole bunch of NSV around traveling.

I’m now planning more trips as I finally feel good.