I got an endoscopy today to look for a hital hernia in advance of planned Sleeve surgery in December.

I sat on edge waiting for the damn pregnancy question..WSM know this next part well..

Why should I have to out myself or lie about how I know I am not pregnant?

First, I am 46 years old, haven't had a cycle in almost 6 months, so I am on my way towards menopause-but not "post" menopausal.

I spent thousands trying to have a second child years ago, so the pregnancy thing is already a very sad question for me, I tend to inadvertently tear up every time I am in a doctor's office since.

No, I am not abstinent, less than a month, thank you.

No, I do not take birth control (um..46)

No, I am not going to get out of bed, with no pants or shoes on, no bra, an open back gown and struggle with an IV to the bathroom to take a pee test-that you forgot to give me before like some teen-ager.

How do I "know" I am not pregnant you ask?

Well....

To a bunch of strange medical people, in a conservative hospital.

Annoying. Treat me like an adult, if I say I am not pregnant, I am not pregnant!

Maybe instead, get your paperwork right so I literally do not have to sit here half naked, tired with a IV on waiting for you to fix the paperwork for WELL over an hour, so they can stick a camera down my throat!

When I got a mammogram elsewhere, they had me fill out a wavier that said, "I certify I am not pregnant because: (abstinent, birth control, menopause or SAME SEX PARTNER)"..and note, it even got around the *label* of gay/lesbian/whatever..

When they call to check on me I am going to mention it, doubt it will change.

I am just cranky and tired. Long ass day, tomorrow as well..and yes, I am STILL not pregnant!

lol, when my intake nurse at surgery told me I was taking a pregnancy test, I just said, look, I am a 47 year old gay woman, like, really very gay, and she just shrugged and said every woman 50 or younger with a uterus gets a pregnancy test, no exceptions.

(I'm in Tennessee, people are pretty conservative here too).

PS for anything like this in the future . . . make them give you a second gown that you can wear like a cape, facing backwards. That will make sure you don't accidentally flash anyone.

My doc almost cancelled my surgery because I couldn't drive to the hospital 48 hrs before my surgery to take a pregnancy test. (I don't live near the hospital and had unbreakable plans that day, also he never told me it was a requirement to have a pregnancy test appointment exactly 48 hrs before surgery until the day before!)

I was so angry - I'm a married gay woman. I was asking, don't you have a waiver I can sign attesting to the fact that I'm not pregnant? and they had the nerve to say that many women don't know they're pregnant and they have no way of knowing if I'm one of those women. The amount of blank stares I got when I said "I'm GAY. I'm MARRIED to a WOMAN who CANNOT PHYSICALLY GET ME PREGNANT." They ended up making me check into my surgery 6 hours early so i could take a test that morning then sit around all day waiting for the results before they'd operate.

It was so insulting. The nurse was so snippy with me that I started getting a little bit punchy back with her. "I had sex with some men in college. But, I graduated in 2002 so... hmm. I could potentially be about 14 and a half years pregnant." They didn't appreciate that.

"I'm GAY. I'm MARRIED to a WOMAN who CANNOT PHYSICALLY GET ME PREGNANT."

It was so insulting. The nurse was so snippy with me that I started getting a little bit punchy back with her. "I had sex with some men in college. But, I graduated in 2002 so... hmm. I could potentially be about 14 and a half years pregnant."

SO insulting!!!! Austin is pretty open, so little worry. I did not have to take a test, my word seemed to be enough (which I would think is not best practice...). To me, a waiver or blood/urine test is gold (I vote waiver). Two days ahead of time pregnancy test is for their benefit, not yours, cause if you are, then they are not all waiting for you. Still, when you know you are not...you are not!

Sperm + Egg in a Q ueer, infertile, semi-menopausal woman is Just Not Going To Happen!

Edited September 1, 20169 yr by Anna Nim

My BFF (gay female) struggled with this. On one form, she simply wrote in all caps NO DICK ALLOWED IN/ON/NEAR MY VAGINA.

This is absolutely why she's my bestie.

I wrote WSM..I meant to say..WSW (women who sleep with other women)..Duh!

But, yeah..plastic or spit babies only?

After years of infertility being given the "are you pregnant" question makes me very sad. I always cry when I go to the doctor's office, any doctor anyway after all of that..

I wrote WSM..I meant to say..WSW (women who sleep with other women)..Duh!

But, yeah..plastic or spit babies only?

After years of infertility being given the "are you pregnant" question makes me very sad. I always cry when I go to the doctor's office, any doctor anyway after all of that..

I'm so sorry. That really does suck.

Some women lie. Some women have no clue. Some women with PCOS are so used to missing periods that they might not even be aware of a pregnancy.

Is it better for the hospital to do a simple test, or pay millions of dollars out to woman after an infant is born with issues after she swore she wasn't pregnant, and she yet she still sues?

Some women lie. Some women have no clue. Some women with PCOS are so used to missing periods that they might not even be aware of a pregnancy.

Is it better for the hospital to do a simple test, or pay millions of dollars out to woman after an infant is born with issues after she swore she wasn't pregnant, and she yet she still sues?

No it is not. THAT is what a waiver is for! THAT covers the hospital, just like when I had a mammogram-they had a waiver that said, "I certify I am not pregnant. Because....(with a list of options, including Same Sex Partner). I *could* have had no clue or, (seriously?) *lie* before surgery, but note: They ended up taking My Word. No blood, no urine.. Clearly there is a measure of common sense. 46 year old semi-menopausal queer woman..yep. Very much not pregnant.

I assume you are a male and have never had the fun of HAVING to out yourself over and over and over and over again every time you see most doctors. OBYNs, ANY surgical or dental procedure, etc. This also compounded over birth control questions At Every Annual Exam for decades. "What method of birth control do you use". "How long since your last menstrual period." "Why do you not need birth control-what method do you use?" "Are you sexually active?" On and on.

This fun goes far, far beyond simple STD testing.

Only made more painful after years of infertility treatments, cause, I would (have) loved NOTHING more in this world to have actually had a positive on a pregnancy test.

I'm so sorry for your struggles. It makes it so much harder to deal with the question. As an ex ER nurse, I can unfortunately attest to the sheer numbers of women who can't tell you when their last period is, or if they did or didn't use bc with their sexual encounters. Women months pregnant with no clue. So unfortunately, women like you who know without a doubt still have to pee in a cup before surgery or any radiology testing. I'm glad some places are being more progressive with the waivers, but the medical personnel have to protect the lowest denominator. I have an iud, my husband has a vasectomy. We laughed at the pre op preg test, because it would be a true miracle for it to be positive. For me it's easier to just give the pee. My 19 year old daughter with the implant and no sex for months had to pee before they'd run her CT scan the other day. She didn't think it should be necessary so I told her ER stories. It's a pain but they haven't found a better way yet.

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women like you who know without a doubt still have to pee in a cup before surgery or any radiology testing.

I did not have to take a pee test, nor a blood test in the end, so it was my word.

It has been years long struggle with this in one way or another.

I didn't know these women, and if they wanted a pee test, then do it BEFORE you have me get undressed and stick a IV in my arm (same thing happened just a few months ago when I had knee surgery. No pee test, my word.)..and in between this and that, am OBGYN-I locked him down quick with The Shunning, LOL...The Outing..

Oh, and I want to thank Alex for fixing the "curse word" filter...it was showing up 'Queer' as '*****'

I was waiting with my SO in an OR prep area (he was having a cataract surgery) and overhead (I'm nosey) the staff freaking out because a 14 year old girl coming in for an operation had a + pregnancy test and they were going to have to cancel surgery (and break the news to her and her Mom)! I felt so bad for her and her Mom.

I hate this for you!! Especially because it causes emotional pain.

My partner had to have one done every time he (He's FtM trans) went to his pain management dr. He'd just laugh and tell they they were wasting their time.

I had a hysterectomy when I was 30 yrs old. So when they ask "when was your last menstrual period?" I say 2007.If they are stupid enough to ask if I'm pregnant after that, then I need a new dr.

Its just to cover their ass. Just like those labels on hair dryers Nd toaster to warn people to not put it in Water.

They go through the questions dozens of times a day. You are just another one they push through. Nothing personal about lawsuits or the questions they ask. You are forgotten about an hour later.

You can blame the women that lie, clueless etc and their lawsuits as to how they proceed about things now.

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