"WHY IS THIS NECESSARY??" along with " I don’t see where your weight is so bad that you can’t get on a diet regiment and exercise program to help that." and a ton of other says.

Of course I broke down my reasons for her. She still doesn't get it. I specifically asked her to not tell my sisters because I know the response from them will be even worse.

I honestly thought she would be a little more supportive than this.

I understand that 9 times out of 10, family is worried about your safety and the risks, and even though I don't have any healthy issues right now I feel like at my age (36, 228lbs) its only a matter of time before I start to develop all of the health issues my fathers side of the family has. Why wait, when I can take control now??? After all the diets and exercise programs I've been through, obviously they weren't working for me very well. This is a tool not a magic pill but I do feel that after seeing everyone's success, its a dang good tool and I'm willing to give it my all.

THIS makes me very sad, because my surgery is only a couple weeks away and I need support. Not the stress of family not supporting me.

Edited June 2, 201610 yr by reachbree

I'm excited your cleared and having your surgery soon... it's hard at first and no way will you be up for company... I was awake and falling asleep and irregular hours the first week or two. I would tell them they need to wait until your able to be up and about and not still hurting from the surgery. Is there a way I can give you my number so you can call if you need support? the first month I think was the hardest for me after that it got a lot easier I will send up a pray that all goes smooth and you heal fast. I am excited for you because I know what a gift this was for me...

reachbree, I know the feeling and I too am 36 years old. I'm just beginning this process of doctor appointments etc and haven't told my Mom or family for fear of what will be said like you're young enough to do it on your own with diet and exercise or that's the easy way out. Yet I've been struggling with my weight since I was 5 and I've tried everything to lose it. Unfortunately my weight now is finally causing medical problems especially Type 2 and infertility so I have to do this to be healthy. Please don't be discouraged by what they say your doing this for you. I know it's easier said then done since I'm thinking of telling my family the night before my surgery but I want to make this decision for me and not be swayed by their negativity.

Good luck and stay strong you are worth it!

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Cari..that woulf be awesome please inbox me.

Traydog.thank you. Hou guys are awesome

Hi reachbree. I'm new here and this is my first post. (Well, I've been lurking awhile.) I plan to make a more formal post of my own in a few minutes. We are about the same age and weight, and maybe at a similar point in the WLS journey. I also fear my mother will have a very negative reaction. Actually, I am positive she will. If I told her I won the lottery, she would have a negative reaction. LOL. I'm sorry you had to deal with her negativity. I have decided not to tell my mom at this time because this is a hard decision and I need to do what is right for me. I don't want other people's negative reactions playing into my own decision making process. What I keep thinking about is how will I feel when I am at a healthy weight and am able to be ME again and do all the things I want to in life. Will the negativity matter then because we will see the truth and how it changed our lives.

Barefoot yes im with u on that! Stay focused on getting positive outcomes.!

Goodluck on your journey.

@@reachbree How are you feeling?

Aaside from all the gas and dizzyness im feeling decent. Really thirsty..

Aaside from all the gas and dizzyness im feeling decent. Really thirsty..

Hopefully you feel better soon! Keep is posted!

I was wondering if you were coherent yet.

The sipping part doesn't last forever. In a few days you'll be swallowing more easily. And in a week or so things will really change.

Hang in there. This is the weirdest part.

I've only told my mother and husband. They've both been very supportive. I am truly blessed. I had made a decision to have the surgery 3 years ago after many failed attempts and struggles with PCOS.

I told myself if I can't do it within the next 2 years I will accept defeat and have the surgery. Here I am. Surgery date is 7/1.

Do it for you. You dont owe anything to anyone but yourself. Their support may come later but don't let this waiver your decision. Surgery is a scary word and what some see as an extreme measure to take so just give her some time. I took my mom to the informational session and with us both being RN's it made complete sense. She even wants to do it now!

I don't think I've ever seen a post here by a woman of legal age who reported that, when she told her mother she was considering or going to have WLS, her mother said: "Oh, honey! I'm so glad. I've been hoping you would consider it. I support you fully and with no reservations 100%!"

I don't recall a single result like that.

Usually it's just like reported in the OP and other earlier comments -- the mother delivers some version of: "You're crazy. You're stupid. You're wrong. You're not fat enough. You're too fat. You're going to die. You're going to have complications. You should go on a diet and exercise. How could you do this to me?!" Or worse.

Most of you know your mother's not going to support you and is going to bust your balls. But against your better judgment you tell her anyway. And then she busts your balls.

My mom actually encouraged me to look into it, so I did. When I told her I scheduled it, in Mexico, she just about had a full blown panic attack. Then went on to tell me she dosnt understand why I'm so big, I didn't get the fat gene from her. There's only been a few times I wanted to slap that ol gal, and that was one of them. I finally talked her down off the ledge of crazy town.

It's your life, your choice to make.

I understand. I did not tell my parents until after I was home from the hospital due to the same thing. You know that you made the right call for you. That is all that matters.

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i talked out of my head most of the day yesterday and early today....those drugs!!

I am finally home however the pain has increased...gas and incision pain...i just vwant this part to be over with now!!

I was wondering if you were coherent yet.

The sipping part doesn't last forever. In a few days you'll be swallowing more easily. And in a week or so things will really change.

Hang in there. This is the weirdest part.

@@2tired2befat lol! I'm not surprised. You have the ones who don't understand weight struggles. Then you have the ones that are comfortable being overweight and thinks you should too. Then you have the ones that are straight up dramatic and freaks out over everything. My Mom and I are pretty close I mean we have our share of differences but She knows my struggle. She too has struggled much longer than I. Shes been overweight pretty much all of her life with some yo yo dieting successes and fails. My struggle came later. Around 28 then I was diagnosed with PCOS. Ever Since I've lost and regained (+5) each time the same 50 lbs. +5 turned into another 35-40 lbs on top of the original 50 and now you have the makings of somones heading to their episode of TLC's my 600lb life. In fact I will admit she was a little salty that I did not include her in my initial decision so that she could've completed the journey with me. Cause again she now wants to do it. I told her she can watch me and decide if she really wants to go through it cause this is no split second decision.

I want to tell others. Other family members, friends, coworkers but I knew they would give me that whole "Really??? I mean do you really need to go so extreme???" I don't need to defend my reasons. I'll be happy to share once they begin to notice my transformation and ask me what I'm doing. Until then... I'm doing it for me.

Keep sipping and take the meds... walking off the gas really helps.... It will pass it's not much fun at first but you will heal and move past it...I think the first week or two were the hardest you got this... it's gonna be okay.... If you have a drain... wear a long necklace and clip it to that for your shower makes showering so much easier... ( I disliked the drain) I think that was the most annoying part for me... gas wasn't too bad but do take any stool softeners they gave you... they make a lot of difference I am so happy for you! You did it!!