So I'm having a new experience with my VSG results. For the first time ever, I'm actually feeling vain about my looks. Normally I don't particularly care about how I look. Compliments embarrass me, I don't wear the latest fashion, heck, I don't even wear makeup. I throw a hat on instead of brushing my hair a lot of days. I had surgery to get healthier, get out of pain, lower my blood pressure, etc. I never did it to fit into single digit sized jeans. I've always been proud of my accomplishment, but never vain. Until now.

I'm going to Florida in a couple weeks. I used to live in St. Pete, like 20 years ago, and still have a lot of friends there. They've all only known me as overweight/obese. They know I had surgery, we've talked on the phone and they have seen pictures of me, but this is our first face to face visit in over 5 years and 100 pounds lighter. And along with my excitement of seeing my friends, i'm feeling what I can best describe as, well, vain. I WANT them to be impressed with the new me. I'm looking forward to the compliments (I hope) they give me. Their praise will be quite self satisfying to me. I am trying on outfits to see which ones make me look good (and skinny), as opposed to throwing "whatever" in a suitcase 15 minutes before heading to the airport. Can't wait to hit the beach and the surf and go kayaking to show off my bod. No offense to people that do care about their looks or feel this way all the time, it's just so out of character for me, I'm not sure what to do with it.

So I'm not really looking for advice, just wanted to share this with the only people that might be able to relate. I guess you're never too far out to discover a new "twist" in your WLS journey.

Be naughty, too, while you are in Florida.

Lol, @@Miss Mac!!! Love it!!!

I agree with the others. The sleeve might have given you QUANTITY control, but you did the rest! Wear that with pride and do not feel guilty about feeling fabulous and wanting to dress and look fabulous...you EARNED IT!!!

trust me I know what you are talking about. I am now a thrift shop nut. I picked yup a pair of Versace jeans mint condition for 7 bucks, i wear 7 for all humanity, lucky, diesel, Rockin republic etc. i picked up a few Armani shirts, Hilfiger, Tommy Bahama, etc friends and co-workers have called me a "fashion bitch" lol i never had anything fashionable to wear because i always shopped at big and tall places. Now i look in a mirror ( especially in changing rooms) and since i still dont recognize myself, ( body dysmorphia at its finest) i revel in looking good.

Im trying not to let it go to my head, but its fun as well. lol

Nothing wrong with wanting to look good and I don't think that makes you vain. Even at my biggest I took care to wear clothes that were as flattering as possible and have done my hair and makeup even if just a little bit. For me that was how I showed myself that I mattered no matter my weight and helped me to feel more confident despite being obese. It's just self love and a boost to a not always present self esteem.

Have fun while down here

Thanks everyone. I knew you would get it! It was just weird to feel myself crossing that fine line between pride and vanity. But thanks to your encouragement I'm gonna rock the shit out of it!

Unfortunately I've got one friend back there that has not been very successful with her lapband. She actually lost a lot of weight (way more than me) but has gained a lot back. So I'm definitely gonna downplay the whole weight thing with her because I don't want her to feel worse than she already does. And I'm OK with that. That's what friends are for. (I guess go ahead and mark your calendars, folks. Yes, Kindle is actually showing compassion for someone else!)

I really am excited about this trip, though. I realized today that other than visiting family, going to conferences or having surgery, I haven't taken time off for an actual vacation in at least 7 years. It will be so nice to take a break from real life, if only for a week.

feeling vain about my looks

@@Kindle

what is the problem with that??

it's ok to feel proud and a little vain

you worked hard to reach your new lifetime goal

i KNOW you will keep up the good work for the rest of your healthier, happier, longer life

your friends might drop their mouths in Florida when they see you

sorry your one friend gained all her weight back with the lapband

IMO you have the right to possibly be the center of attention for a while

if you are in group with her, see how she reacts to compliments about you

if she gets all sad, downplay the situation

you can casually change the subject, drift elsewhere

change the topic

when you are alone, see how she wants to talk with you about WLS

about what happened with her regain

maybe she would welcome advice one on one

its possible she is very interested in your situation, how you ate etc

let her take the lead

since the "new" me has "arrived" i have become "a little"vain! too

ie will pass a mirror at Kohl's and stare for a bit

fix my hair and even smile!!!

i know you look great

enjoy it, don't be toooo shy

stand tall & proud

when you got it flaunt it!!!

have a great time in the sunshine state

kathy

congrats

Would it be wrong of me to suggest you not describe this wonderful feeling as "vanity" but perhaps as pride in yourself for a well-done success? I also find myself taking more time with my appearance than I have for many years and, personally, I think this is a sign I am mentally healthier. Self-esteem is important and we gain it when we've made a hard and needed change,which you have done! Don't call it vanity. Everyone appreciates positive regard. It's just so human! Go and enjoy the positive feedback! (and ignore any naysayers, if that happens)

Perfectly said, it's called taking pride in yourself!!