Feeling ashamed

[hollybower 122]

I haven't had my sleeve yet. I'm on visit number 3 of the required 6. I had a very stressful day and a lot happened today. I have been eating healthier and have been doing good until today. I stress ate and ended up going over my daily calories by 800!!! I'm a hog and I'm ashamed.

[Sharon1964 2,530]

You're not a hog. You reacted to stress the way you have for years. It takes a while for the old habits to be replaced by new ones.

Tomorrow is a fresh start. You'll be fine.

[Sharkfighter58 8]

You're not a hog! You just had a rough day. We've all had them. Just start fresh tomorrow. Messing up doesn't make you a bad person, it just makes you human!

[greeniedbabe069 1]

Trust me stress is a huge factor in why i have trouble losing weight it is the hardest thing in our life to fight but with strength and power u will win keep pushing. ..i know i push and fight everyday. ..

[BLERDgirl 6,417]

This is the mental work of WLS. Use this as a learning experience.

1. Develop a list of 3 or 4 things to do the next time you are feeling this stressed that do not include food. Write them down.

2. Find something positive to say about yourself. Try saying something like you reacted negatively to stress instead of calling yourself a hog. You are not a hog. Love yourself enough to no longer allow anyone, yourself included to call you names.

[shellyd88 463]

Next time you get to feeling this way ask yourself what will change if u eat all of the food you want when u get stressed out what will make what already happened and is over change or be better by you eating more calories than u want or need and then feeling more stress over that?

[rmg19881015 20]

im also still pre op and cant seem to get ahould on things. I have days where im like ok this is it im gonna start fresh and start eating better and then theirs days when I just cant control it as well. its very hard but you will make it threw you gotta be strong if you want a healthier life. Good luck to you!

[FrankyG 1,450]

Negative self talk is very harming. I struggle with this as well. I can start out calling myself all kinds of names in my head when I make a mistake, but the fact is, everyone everywhere that has ever lived has made mistakes and sometimes handle things badly. And even that perfect/pretty person that you might envy - they are just as flawed as the rest of us.

We happen to handle stressors by turning to food for comfort. That sucks. But with the help of this surgery, we'll gain a bit more control over the physical need to eat or overeat. The big part you need to work on are the mental aspects of using food for comfort. And one of the ways to do this is to stop the negative self talk and start telling yourself that you are a strong, amazing person that doesn't need to eat lots of bad food to feel better.

I'm a good person, and a temporary misstep doesn't change that.

You are a good person too. Please start telling yourself that - and believing it too.

[WLSResources/ClothingExch 3,443]

@@hollybower, @@BLERDgirl gave you excellent ideas under the umbrella, "learning experience."

Spend some time tomorrow, on and off if necessary, writing down a few ideas on what you may have done differently today when faced with the stressful situations. You'll have a few more hours distance from today's overeating, so some thoughts probably will have percolated. It can be anything from rearranging closets to knitting to taking a walk. Actually a walk would be great on a few fronts.

If you do feel stress on a fairly often, try http://shrinkyourself.com

It deals with emotional eating and related areas. Sign up for the free, emailed newsletter version, read them and do the exercises. After trying it out, you can then opt for the pay version or perhaps buy Dr. Gould's book (I'm not familiar with the latter two).

Yes, you didn't want to overeat. No, 800 calories is not catastrophic. No, don't call yourself unkind things in my presence. You'll send me straight to the ice cream. We're in this together.

[rking 484]

You are not alone girlfriend!!!! I cheated on my pre op diet 4 times. I felt a little guilty but not horribly. I knew I was wrong but I also knew it wasn't the end of the world for me and it wasn't the end of my weight loss journey. It isn't for you either sweetheart!!!

We learn from our mistakes, so learn from this . I love the suggestions above. Also, when I lose my discipline and want to eat due to boredom or stress or loneliness , I either take a big drink of Water or take a walk. Just take yourself out of the situation immediately. Kinda like a little child. When they misbehave or start to get into something they are not supposed to, we redirect their attention to something else.

Hang in there! You will have a great day tomorrow!!!

[MrsSugarbabe 727]

The mental aspect of weight loss is sometimes the most difficult. I've been extremely encouraged often by posts on BariatricPal and also at Beck Diet Solution. Beck is a cognitive behavior site (available online and via Facebook) that helps with our relationship toward food and how we handle situations and our thought processes. Please check it out sometime.

http://www.beckdietsolution.com/daily-diet-solutions/

We all have done what you've done so you're in great company. Just because you didn't make the best choices yesterday does not mean you are a bad person. Love yourself. Now start again because today is a new day.