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Stupid things people say when they find out you've had surgery....



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When discussing my plans with my close group of girlfriends, I got

"Don't you want to hire a personal trainer and give it one last shot?"

You know, because the $90/mo for boot camp I pay and the $350/mo for the medical weight loss program (aka phentermine pill mill) wasn't enough already.

"I just think it's taking the easy way out for SOME people, not all. Like liposuction." liposuction? Really??? FOH.

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At Christmas an extended family member gave me the "ugh, why did you do THAT to yourself, I'd rather do it the natural way". To which I responded with "I am still doing this the natural way by making the choices to not eat all day and to watch every bite that goes in my mouth and exercising. This surgery simply helped me to be able to manage Portion Control while I do the work!" Ugh, people make me crazy!

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I know people mean well, but I got a lot more of my favorite question "do you feel better?". Yes, yes I suppose I do but that just seems like such an odd question to me. It would never cross my mind to ask that to other people.

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I'm giving my sister the benefit of the doubt that she really didn't mean this as it sounds. She told me she started dieting after hearing of my approval for the sleeve surgery, because she didn't want to be "the fat daughter". I guess my being at 350+ all this time made it okay for her to be morbidly obese as long as I weighed more than her. Oh well, I'll look at my sleeve as benefitting not only me but as a sister diet tool too I guess.

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I know people mean well, but I got a lot more of my favorite question "do you feel better?". Yes, yes I suppose I do but that just seems like such an odd question to me. It would never cross my mind to ask that to other people.

I get that a lot too. But you can imagine their faces when I say, "no, actually I don't. I can't take my daily anti-inflammatory so I'm in pain now. Hopefully it will resolve itself."

Cue the crickets.

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I'm giving my sister the benefit of the doubt that she really didn't mean this as it sounds. She told me she started dieting after hearing of my approval for the sleeve surgery, because she didn't want to be "the fat daughter". I guess my being at 350+ all this time made it okay for her to be morbidly obese as long as I weighed more than her. Oh well, I'll look at my sleeve as benefitting not only me but as a sister diet tool too I guess.

Yikes! I can understand why someone would THINK that (even if it is a very vain and mean thing to think), but to actually say it out loud and to the person that is bigger than you...wow!

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Yeah, I got the I'v got to get to work because I can't let you beat me, from my mom and one sister. They are amazingly supportive and I should not complain but it was kinda of a weird statement.

I'm giving my sister the benefit of the doubt that she really didn't mean this as it sounds. She told me she started dieting after hearing of my approval for the sleeve surgery, because she didn't want to be "the fat daughter". I guess my being at 350+ all this time made it okay for her to be morbidly obese as long as I weighed more than her. Oh well, I'll look at my sleeve as benefitting not only me but as a sister diet tool too I guess.

Yikes! I can understand why someone would THINK that (even if it is a very vain and mean thing to think), but to actually say it out loud and to the person that is bigger than you...wow!

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When explaining the sleeve to my mum, I used the term 'tool', she scrunched up her face, as if this is too drastic to be a tool. I said "think of it like sports shoes, wearing them won't make you good runner, but they sure help!"

I'm only going to tell people close to me. Family and bf have been very supportive so far, there have been some dumb questions, but mostly out of curiosity. If any of the prior comments come my way from others that find out, I certainly won't pussyfoot around their feelings.

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"You look beautiful now! ..... Now that you didn't look beautiful before"

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"You look beautiful now! ..... Now that you didn't look beautiful before"

geesh!

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A cousins fiancé said "I hope you are saving up for skin removal or have already saved up". How was that any of her concern. Hmmm.

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"Your husband must be so happy now!". Really?! Because our relationship must have been completely based on looks and at 100 lbs heavier I must have somehow been a disappointment to him? I'm not sure how people realizes this sounds, but to me it implies that I went through surgery only for my husband's personal happiness and not my own!!

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I was discussing this journey of mine with my husband and he said a stupid thing tonight

"Why don't you just eat an apple a day for a month and you'll lose weight" ......that's how ridiculous people are sometimes.

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I was discussing this journey of mine with my husband and he said a stupid thing tonight

"Why don't you just eat an apple a day for a month and you'll lose weight" ......that's how ridiculous people are sometimes.

Hahahahaa! Those magical apples!

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@ Santiago

So true!

I kept my surgery to myself except for my husband, sister, and 2 good friends, one of which was also have the surgery.

I did not care or need the comments people would offer regardless if I have asked their opinion, before or after the surgery. And when people say "you've lost weight" I say "well, I do what I can" or "sure trying to" or the even "its a struggle".

The people who know see me working my butt off literally, and the people who don't know, well they see me working my butt off literally.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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