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Stupid things people say when they find out you've had surgery....



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I am 3 weeks post op and ready to go back to work on Monday called my boss to let her know( by the way she is an RN) and she asked me how many calories I was eating a day and told her between 600-700. And her answer to that was "that is not enough calories to sustain good health". Really, as a nurse you think she would know better on what happens when you remove three quarters of your stomach and it only holds 4 ounces.

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I am in a long distance relationship. Someone said to me, "after you lose weight, are you going to meet someone local?"

::blinkblink::

Sure, because the reason I'm in a long-distance relationship is because I can't get a man that wants to see me more often since I'm so fat!

I'm in a long distance relationship too! I've been asked this more than once. Lol it makes me laugh so hard!

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I just had revision surgery. Sleeve to RNY. I didn't hide it. I was miserable with GERD prior to the revision. A friend of mine had the nerve to say...

"Oh man... Gastric bypass people look like bobble heads.. Your going to have a bobble head"

Um really? My husband said the look on my face was priceless. Like a cross between did that just come out of your mouth and are you really that effing stupid?

My face let's me hide nothing about what I am thinking! Lol

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@@MichJohn77 - WOW! You showed great restraint by not backslapping her. That is one of the worst / funniest ones I have heard!

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WTF is this "bobble head" effect?

That are they talking about?

And yes, many people are absolutely nuts. Not to mention uninformed about WLS.

So glad I'm on the down low re my own WLS. Sheez. I wouldn't want to have to endure the crap some of you do.

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Bobble head effect is when your head is not proportioned to your body. Like the sports and animal figures that many have where every slight movement makes the head wobble. Look up 'little penny hardaway '

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My mom asked me last night, "are you doing this just to look better?". Now, do you think my insurance would cover at 100% just to make me prettier??

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Sigh.

"All you had to do was workout and eat right! Instead you've ruined your health with surgery."

Ummmmm. Okay. Pretty sure I'm healthier now. Pretty sure the countless hours I spent in the gym was me attempting to workout and the countless diets I went on was me trying to eat right.

This coming from a person who LOVED to come home and bake Cookies if I was dieting.

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"Well, have you tried just diet and excerise?"

Like every other overweight person on the planet, only about 100 times......

So funny! "Hmmm oh I should try dieting before I decide on surgery?" Thanks for the advice!

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When someone says "did you try diet and exercise first?" Im going to be like-

"No way! I don't wanna have to give up my favorite foods! And the gyms wayyyyy to much work. I'd rather just have my stomach chopped off...."

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These comments are the main reason I haven't told many people, because people are rude and have no filter. My mom and sisters only know and I made them swear to never let anyone know. People comment on how much weight I lost and it does make me feel uncomfortable and I can't imagine how many more questions and comments they would have of they knew. I tell them i been on a diet for months and they are just noticing the weight loss now and that I cut down my portions and mainly eat Protein which is all very true.

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Whenever I hear someone say that the surgery was "cheating" or the "easy way out" I just want to tell them

oh really, yeah because going to consultations with the surgeon, a psychologist, nutritionist, cardiologist, pulmonologist, hematologist, rheumatologist...then having numerous blood tests, ekgs, ultrasounds, xrays...then battling with insurance...then dealing with post op issues, not getting to eat the things you like, watching others carelessly shove food into their mouths, walking for half an hour when you have no energy...

oh yeah, that was really easy

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My formerly good friend (one of very few I actually told) said 'Why would you tell me that? I didn't need to know that!'.

'Well I guess I needed to know you're a b***' was my imaginary response. The actual one was closer to 'Just in case you cared'. :)

She acted as if she was uncomfortable with me sharing such a 'personal' information. Fun! I'm so over her.

That comment from a friend would've really and pissed me off....BIG TIME!!! That was supposed to be a friend.

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My formerly good friend (one of very few I actually told) said 'Why would you tell me that? I didn't need to know that!'.

'Well I guess I needed to know you're a b***' was my imaginary response. The actual one was closer to 'Just in case you cared'. :)

She acted as if she was uncomfortable with me sharing such a 'personal' information. Fun! I'm so over her.

That comment from a friend would've really and pissed me off....BIG TIME!!! That was supposed to be a friend.

My best friend and my family were initially the only people I planned on telling. When I told my best friend she said "well I don't think it's fair that people get surgery to be skinny. Now I'm gonna be the fat girl of us two".....

Ummmmmm what?

Guess who isn't my best friend anymore. And this also played a role in why I decided to be open about my surgery. I needed the support and the people I wanted it from weren't supportive and the people who I never imagined would support me have been there the most.

Crazy. You learn who your friends are in this insane journey.

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That's my exact reason for not telling... People are so negative

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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