So I'm still in the beginning stages of my Weight loss journey. I had just my my first appointment with my bariatric surgeon I was told by that office that I would need to check in with my primary doctor every month for six months on a weight loss program.

So I go this morning just to get weighed in and I have to wait an hour, I've only been with this doctor for maybe a little under a year. I have asthma, I have been there multiple times now, she never suggests any preventative care, the last time I was there I mentioned my weight and that I feel it's a huge factor with my asthma, she looks in my chart and says oh.. Well I see you've been overweight for several years now. (Really genius, thanks for noticing). And hands me a diabetic patient diet of 1200 calories. (I'm not diabetic). So needless to say I was doing my own research this past month when I came across this site and made my own appointments.

So today she tells me, oh well what I've seen is that most patients gain back all the weight 2 years after surgery, and you need to show you are at least trying or you will be denied. She's like have you done anything?

I mean first off I was livid and on the verge of tears, as most of you who have been overweight for a long time know, we have tried EVERYTHING! Weight watchers, medical weight loss, gyms, trainers, classes, pretty much tried it all. And she pretty much burst my bubble regarding even having surgery!

Sorry this was long but I needed to let it out.

She just comes off as cold, and unforgiving, and unsupportive, I know being overweight is my fault. I did this to myself but I felt that she was saying that I'm taking the easy way out by having surgery.

Edited July 10, 201511 yr by FayBee

I'm so sorry. Please find another PCP under your insurance plan. I've actually become really good friends with my PCP of the past eight years. She told me last week that she can tell I'll be one of those bariatric patients that never gains their weight back. I don't know how she can tell the future, but what a self esteem boost! It is nice to have others, especially in the medical field, have such faith in your weight loss success and maintenance. It really makes a difference.

The last thing you want is for this to influence some kind of self fulfilling prophecy. Yeah, you could ignore such comments, but they do effect you on some subconscious level. Therefore, get another PCP even if you have to wait a little longer. Good Luck and keep your head up! Remind yourself that you are not like "everyone else' that has weight loss surgery and gains their weight back.

I agree 100% with WL warrior. I struggled with my weight and had diabetes and lupus and my primary doctor told me that I just needed to run around the block a few times to get my sugar lowered... I kept him for 3-4 years when I finally got tired of his silly views on weight loss. The first day with my new primary she instantly enrolled me in bariatric classes and I then began my journey to becoming healthy and finally losing the weight. Dump that PCP maybe get a female PCP and don't let anyone discourage you towards your success! ????????

If you don't want to wait to get into another PCP, then you may use this doctors attitude to give you the strength to totally prove him/her wrong. My mother did not support my WLS and thought it was going to be just another failed weight loss attempt. Even the morning of surgery, she made the comment that it was just a waste of time. They always say mother is always right. Well, I did everything in my power to prove her wrong and succeeded. She is now very bothered by my weight loss, but that is a whole other story.

You can get a lot of encouragement on this forum if you aren't getting any elsewhere. Some people on here know just as much or more than come bariatric or weight loss physicians.

Edited July 10, 201511 yr by WL WARRIOR

I do have a female PCP. I specifically picked one thinking she might be more understanding, Boy was a wrong. I'm going to lose weight and I'm going to do it however I see fit. I started walking on my treadmill 3 weeks ago, no results so far. And I plan on switching doctors, I'm getting new insurance starting August 1st. (More preventative care friendly) the bariatric clinic actually suggested it. And I think I will find a PCP that meets my needs and won't make me feel bad about a decision that I had to really force myself into believing would work for me.

If you don't want to wait to get into another PCP, then you may use this doctors attitude to give you the strength to totally prove him/her wrong. My mother did not support my WLS and thought it was going to be just another failed weight loss attempt. Even the morning of surgery, she made the comment that it was just a waste of time. They always say mother is always right. Well, I did everything in my power to prove her wrong and succeeded. She is now very bothered by my weight loss, but that is a whole other story.

You can get a lot of encouragement on this forum if you aren't getting any elsewhere. Some people on here know just as much or more than come bariatric or weight loss physicians.

I agree 100% with WL warrior. I struggled with my weight and had diabetes and lupus and my primary doctor told me that I just needed to run around the block a few times to get my sugar lowered... I kept him for 3-4 years when I finally got tired of his silly views on weight loss. The first day with my new primary she instantly enrolled me in bariatric classes and I then began my journey to becoming healthy and finally losing the weight. Dump that PCP maybe get a female PCP and don't let anyone discourage you towards your success! ????????

Thank you guys for the encouragement!

You may want to ask your surgeon's office for a recommendation for a PCP. They probably have some local doctors they work with frequently that they know to be supportive of their patients' weight loss goals and plans, as well as good established communication between the two doctors' offices.

Doctors are service workers. They are providing a service in exchange for funds. They work for you. Make them treat you with respect. Switch. This doctor doesn't deserve your business. Once you have a new Doctor, go online and leave a rating for this one so someone else doesn't suffer.

I went to the same PCP for about 12 years and in the end I just decided she simply "did not get it"

She is a very thin woman and felt that if I just bought the right cookbooks, learned how to cook healthy that would solve everything. I felt like she had absolutely no idea the battles a person faces from a lifetime (or long term) of overweight and obesity.

The cookbook comment was the last straw after many years...

My surgeon's office was expert with the insurance and really my PCP had nothing to do with it - thank goodness!

Good luck, I know it is hard to go through this process and you hope for some support.

Wondering if you saw the same PCP I saw the first time I started this process 2 years ago. I wasn't able to go through with surgery back then because of finances. Honestly I don't think I would have been comfortable or successful proceeding had I stayed with that judgmental, cold doctor. I am now scheduled for July 21. Having a PCP who is supportive and actively tells me she believes in me makes all the difference. She is one of my biggest cheerleaders!

Get s new PCP because they have to submit a detailed letter of support to the insurance company before you're approved. You don't want to get to the end of the process and have a delay because she's not fully supportive. So sorry to hear this.

Thanks ladies. I've been looking for a new Pcp and I'm going to call my surgeons office this morning to see if they have any suggestions. Im not letting this woman ruin my plans. I was discouraged for a day but now I feel back on track!

I think you will feel better with a new PCP. It's important that you feel comfortable with your doc so you don't put off calling them if you have an issue. I love my PCP! He was the first doctor to ever talk about my weight. To me, that meant that he cared. I sat on the fence about surgery for a really long time. He was patient, supportive and honest

If you have to see this woman again before you get another doctor, I suggest coming clean with her. Tell her that you are disappointed in your doctor-patient relationship, that she doesn't seem to care about you as a patient, she never suggests any preventive care, etc. Tell her that you've done your research on bariatric surgery and the truth is NOT that most people gain all the weight back, and you don't appreciate her defeatist attitude.

Even if nothing comes of it, you may be helping another patient not have to go through the same thing. You never know, she may even apologize and sit down and listen to you.

I am lucky to have found a lovely, supportive gp who is happy I am making changes to improve my health. The gp I saw previously was also great, but was an hour's drive away, and unfortunately didn't bulk bill. The medical practice I go to now does bulk bill, which is a godsend considering how often I am there, either for one of my chronic medical conditions, or with one of my kids ???? I am saving a fortune!