this is not directed at anyone in particular and in fact was inspired by multiple posts over nearly 4 years...

I find it freaking annoying that people post that they cannot comply with XX because they are "picky eaters". okay, lets get real. How did you possibly get morbidly obese (ie 100# or more overweight) being a delicate eater?

Okay, let's imagine that happened. Now, you are in the battle for your freaking life, and you will let something like "that didn't taste good" interfere with your success? Really? I so understand how hard it is.. but really?????

Do you think I don't dream of snickers bars and have a bit of Protein drink in my coffee instead?

I have read about how people hate to choose shrimp and chicken over "yummy food" when going out... I get that it is venting, but honestly, what did you expect? (besides, shrimp skewers are delish!) I actually want a serious answer to that question. Do some imagine that by the sheer act of stomach reduction that lasting weight loss was guaranteed without changing your eating patterns?

ok,, vent over - carry on!

Once again ... HOW did I miss seeing this thread until now?!

What I'm tired of is people who actually get pissy about those who actually follow their surgeons' instructions because "no one can really eat like that."

I'm done with "encouraging" those kinds of folks. F**k 'em.

I hear ya! Like you, I've been chided on here for being too perfect when it comes to following my surgeon's instructions. I think those people make themselves feel better and try to rationalize their choices by saying "no one can do it". Like you, I say f***k em. But I've been dealing with those types my whole life...I graduated from high school and college with straight A's, and some people were sure it's because I must have cheated...teachers pet, suck up, brown noser, goody two shoes...heard em all and proud of it!

@@CowgirlJane I know which kind of posts you are talking about. It's not the ones that choose to be selective about how they eat postop in order to be healthier. Its not the ones that do get physically ill from certain foods. It's the ones that try to use the "I don't like it" excuse for making bad choices postop. The ones that are too lazy to look up and try new recipes. The ones that want it to be easy. In essence, the ones that will fail because they won't change....But will continue to whine about it.

I will admit that I'm somewhat of a picky eater, but it's not because I just don't like whatever it is that I'm picky about. There's certain textures and flavors that simply make me gag, to the point of vomiting. It's a little hard to force yourself to eat something when it can literally make you vomit. Fish, for example, I can only eat if it has a firmer texture and doesn't taste like fish, because "fishy" flavors make me gag. Shrimp and other seafood/shellfish is an absolute no-go, due to the flavor and the texture (like old Jello that's been allowed to sit uncovered in the refrigerator and develop a hard film on it). Anything with a thicker layer of fat on it or a greasy texture is a no-go, due to the texture of the fat (thicker bacon, rib-eye steak, chicharrones, some sausages, etc.).

I am better about it than I used to be, though. I now eat some types of Beans, mushrooms, and ground meats, and those were no-gos a few years ago. Vegetables are generally pretty safe for me, to the point where I've actually considered becoming a vegetarian.

First of all, vegetarian here. I could really use some company. Feel free to come sit by me anytime!

Secondly the term "picky eater" chaps my biscuits in the worse way! Why should I eat something that makes me gag? Or has an unpleasant mouth feel?

I won't even go into it with people who try to tell me that my allergies are "all in my head".

@CowgirlJane I know which kind of posts you are talking about. It's not the ones that choose to be selective about how they eat postop in order to be healthier. Its not the ones that do get physically ill from certain foods. It's the ones that try to use the "I don't like it" excuse for making bad choices postop. The ones that are too lazy to look up and try new recipes. The ones that want it to be easy. In essence, the ones that will fail because they won't change....But will continue to whine about it.

YES, YES, YES!!!!

Silly me tried to share a way to make a pizza like meal for someone who said they missed Dominoes Pizza. May as well have recommended they fly to the moon.

Edited March 29, 201511 yr by BLERDgirl

@@BLERDgirl - I hear what you're saying. I've been reading the posts on here and there seems to be a wide spectrum of what people eat post sleeve - I mean after they're past the healing part - when they are on "regular" food. I have read that someone was in pain for 2 hours from one crouton and another who said on weekends all bets are off - pizza and chocolate in moderation and everything in between. Some were told - only Protein (meat) and no veggies or fruit - others that it was okay. Some say there is nothing they can't eat - only in smaller quantities. Some were told by their NUT that denying yourself something you like every once in awhile is a recipe for failure. If someone is being successful in their weight loss, exercising and becoming healthier - isn't that what this is all about? I think each person has to find their own path to success. If they're struggling because of bad food choices, then that is a different issue.

Once someone has healed and on solid food, why would anyone eat a food that they didn't like? For example, I would never eat cheese or yogurt before or after surgery. Ever. That doesn't make me picky. We all have foods we hate and hated before surgery. That doesn't mean we can't make good food choices - just ones that we could/would have eaten before surgery, too.

@@Kindle you summarized my meaning exactly, using it as an excuse. I can assure you that potato is my favorite food and I eat very little of it now...since I understand it contributes to my hunger and weight gain.

I went on a biz trip this week and did a few dinners with someone who lost about 100# and probably has 75# to go. One thing she brought up was having to learn to like new foods and flavors. She said she was raised on hamburger helper Mac and cheese and cold Cereal and had been raising her kids that way. I admired that she was slowly developing a taste for salad, veggies, seafood etc. She told me it intimidated her to try some of those things but she would sample something of mine and really like it. I think that "try" attitude goes a long way to finding a new path and making lasting change.

Once again ... HOW did I miss seeing this thread until now?!

What I'm tired of is people who actually get pissy about those who actually follow their surgeons' instructions because "no one can really eat like that."

I'm done with "encouraging" those kinds of folks. F**k 'em.

I hear ya! Like you, I've been chided on here for being too perfect when it comes to following my surgeon's instructions. I think those people make themselves feel better and try to rationalize their choices by saying "no one can do it". Like you, I say f***k em. But I've been dealing with those types my whole life...I graduated from high school and college with straight A's, and some people were sure it's because I must have cheated...teachers pet, suck up, brown noser, goody two shoes...heard em all and proud of it!

@@CowgirlJane I know which kind of posts you are talking about. It's not the ones that choose to be selective about how they eat postop in order to be healthier. Its not the ones that do get physically ill from certain foods. It's the ones that try to use the "I don't like it" excuse for making bad choices postop. The ones that are too lazy to look up and try new recipes. The ones that want it to be easy. In essence, the ones that will fail because they won't change....But will continue to whine about it.

What surprises me is how many people on this board (compared to at least one other board I frequent) are so resentful about what they *have* to do to be successful with WLS, other than have someone cut off 85% of their stomachs.

I sometimes think this board attracts a larger proportion of people, regardless of their chronological ages, with "teenage thinking" (my apologies to teenagers ). Those folks seem to compulsively resist following WLS guidelines and resent those who remind them of the guidelines.

It's also clear that some who ask for advice or feedback are just really looking for support for their approaches. It's no surprise veterans drift away.

This is actually a different topic. Sorry for the derail, @@CowgirlJane .

Edited March 30, 201511 yr by VSGAnn2014

What surprises me is how many people on this board (compared to at least one other board I frequent) are so resentful about what they *have* to do to be successful with WLS, other than have someone cut off 85% of their stomachs.

I sometimes think this board attracts a larger proportion of people, regardless of their chronological ages, with "teenage thinking" (my apologies to teenagers ). Those folks seem to compulsively resist following WLS guidelines and resent those who remind them of the guidelines.

It's also clear that some who ask for advice or feedback are just really looking for support for their approaches. It's no surprise veterans drift away.

This is actually a different topic. Sorry for the derail, @@CowgirlJane .

LOL Agree.. Those are the ones you will see who had a "failed" surgery.. or regain. I don't plan on going back to my life prior to WLS!

It's also clear that some who ask for advice or feedback are just really looking for support for their approaches. It's no surprise veterans drift away.

And then they cry bully when you don't tell them what they want to hear.

What is interesting to me about your remark is comparing the "culture" of those two different forums. I too started out on the other but as you know rarely post there anymore. At some point, a few months post op, i realized that there were more people here that were inspiring to me... I chose a strategy to pick a handful of people who were "similiar" to me - revised from band, lots of weight to lose - and were successful. I focused on listening to THEM. i found the other forum friendlier at times but not as inspiring or useful.

Now, since I am not known there very well, when I do drop in I have a high probability of ticking someone off or tangling with a certain guy which i find fascinating. It is like the "culture" is just enough different that I manage to rub people wrong pretty predictably.

I do understand why vets don't hang around. There are several who are a year or two further out than me who are in somewhat contact, but really don't want to read posts about the 3 week stall anymore. somewhere along the line, the tipping point is reached and they just stop altogether.

What surprises me is how many people on this board (compared to at least one other board I frequent) are so resentful about what they *have* to do to be successful with WLS, other than have someone cut off 85% of their stomachs.

I sometimes think this board attracts a larger proportion of people, regardless of their chronological ages, with "teenage thinking" (my apologies to teenagers ). Those folks seem to compulsively resist following WLS guidelines and resent those who remind them of the guidelines.

It's also clear that some who ask for advice or feedback are just really looking for support for their approaches. It's no surprise veterans drift away.

This is actually a different topic. Sorry for the derail, @@CowgirlJane .

@@CowgirlJane the difference in cultures is fascinating. There is a third forum that is probably a bit more hard-ass than this one and there is basically zero tolerance for the "I'm bored with purees, I'm going to eat Fritos instead, is that okay?" type of posts, and people will pile on those for days. I enjoy that one a lot

or tangling with a certain guy which i find fascinating.

I don't know if it's the same guy but the scenario that I often see at that other place you were discussing is:

1. random poster complains about stall or not losing fast enough

2. A certain guy parachutes in, announces that we aren't on a diet and if you don't eat whatever the hell you want in whatever quantity you want, then you will fail, and you should probably go eat some pizza right now (okay I'm exaggerating but only a bit)

3. five other posters show up to tell the certain guy how brilliant he is and how much they worship him

@@Bufflehead

Ohhhhh...message me the names of these forums...

2. A certain guy parachutes in, announces that we aren't on a diet and if you don't eat whatever the hell you want in whatever quantity you want, then you will fail, and you should probably go eat some pizza right now (okay I'm exaggerating but only a bit)

3. five other posters show up to tell the certain guy how brilliant he is and how much they worship him

I thought that was hilarious! Truth be told, I am also not on a diet and I eat pizza at least once every 2-4 weeks. And, I thoroughly enjoy my little slice!

What surprises me is how many people on this board (compared to at least one other board I frequent) are so resentful about what they *have* to do to be successful with WLS, other than have someone cut off 85% of their stomachs.

I sometimes think this board attracts a larger proportion of people, regardless of their chronological ages, with "teenage thinking" (my apologies to teenagers ). Those folks seem to compulsively resist following WLS guidelines and resent those who remind them of the guidelines.

It's also clear that some who ask for advice or feedback are just really looking for support for their approaches. It's no surprise veterans drift away.

This is actually a different topic. Sorry for the derail, @@CowgirlJane .

LOL Agree.. Those are the ones you will see who had a "failed" surgery.. or regain. I don't plan on going back to my life prior to WLS!

I have an issue with this statement, honestly. Not all of us who had a failed surgery failed because we didn't follow the rules. I actually felt the way you do, until it happened to me, too. Stating that all people who have failed did so because they made mistakes is over-simplifying things, and to be honest, comes across as smug. Now I realize that some fail because they didn't follow the rules, but a huge number of us failed because the surgery failed us, especially those of us who started out with the lap-band.

Edited March 31, 201511 yr by losing_the_band

I drifted away for about a year...now I completely ignore almost all posts from people who have had weight loss surgery less than a few months....I find they don't have a clue what I'm talking about, and just too early for them to understand...so I just got tired of saying "Hang in there"..."It gets better" all the time....

@@Bufflehead

Ohhhhh...message me the names of these forums...

Me too...I can parachute in and be the "Bully" to them....

@@Bufflehead and @@VSGAnn2014 your renditions of that "other" forum is spot on! And I know that guy and his worshippers. Obviously they never paid attention to his ticker to see that their God is still very much still overweight at almost 300 pounds, if I remember right. Yeah, THAT's who's advice I want to follow! Anyways, I've only recently visited back there only to realize why I left. And @@CowgirlJane, don't worry, I've managed to piss off a lot of people on BOTH forums! F**k em all I say!

As for veterans on here, I don't know if I qualify, but am definitely OVER the "woe is me, I'm stalled" and "I only lost x pounds so I must be a failure" and "is it OK to eat this?" posts. I try really hard to ignore them, but sometimes I can't hit the back button fast enough. I'm thinking of posting a "STAY OF THE scale AND TRY USING THE SEARCH BUTTON BEFORE YOU POST ANOTHER STUPID QUESTION" thread on every subforum everyday to see if any of them actually notice.

Edited March 31, 201511 yr by Kindle