CowgirlJane

Thank you for sharing. When I was investigating plastic surgery/skin removal I talked to several people on the phone as well as of course forum messages etc. What I discovered is that the people that basically accepted themselves were the happiest with their skin removal results. It is similar to what you are saying, there has to be a basic self love, quality of life, good health in place before you can genuinely enjoy and fully benefit your new "slim life". So, it is painful to regain but look at where you started! You are still a success story!!!

Good article, thanks Alex. Someone I know is revolted by fat people. I speak up, but not strongly enough, thanks for the reminder.

I found it very helpful that my (former) PCP made such a ridiculous remark about my decision to seek the sleeve. She wanted me to try buying better cookbooks first. After a lifetime of obesity, weight watchers, nutrisystems and every fad diet out there - you don't think I already own a bookshelf full of healthy cookbooks? At that moment, her simplistic view of decades long fight toward better health made me realize I was DONE... and i never looked back!

Oh good grief...I am either in or out? Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using the BariatricPal App

know thyself. I got a bottle of Baileys for christmas. My christmas eve dinner party ended with us each having a small bit on ice. It has been in my cabinet since... haven't even thought about it until now. A week ago, I bought a container of choc chip mint ice cream. I ate a 1/2 cup a day until it was gone - I measured.. I couldn't forget it, the siren's call was so strong it was all I could do to keep from eating until I felt sick which is why I put it in these tiny 1/2 cup serving dish and forced myself to not heap it. I should have thrown it away. So, for me, clearly ice cream is something I probably can't manage all that well as it is an old trigger (I don't even like it THAT much but it just seems to call my name!) whereas a bottle of spirits has it's time and place and I don't have white knuckle it to ignore it whilst under my roof. They are both empty calories, there are clearly healthier foods and drinks to consume, but one calls my name and the other doesn't. I guess I have a problem with the one size fits all approach and I while I do agree that addictions can be a real problem, and should be considered - it seems like it is an overgeneralization to say that people in maintenance should "never" do ...fill in the blank... We need to know ourselves and how to balance a healthier lifestyle against things we enjoy or find fun. I know several cigarette smokers - talk about something useless and harmful to consume!! Why aren't we ranting about THAT?!?

I am not denying that alcohol can be a problem - it hits you much harder post WLS. At 4 years out though, I consider social drinking as one of my lifestyle balancing acts. I don't need the empty calories, very true, but I am maintaining at goal, have healthy blood work, healthy liver (had scan done due to stones so could see my liver looked good per the doctors) and as mentioned above, much prefer my few times a month happy hour with the girls or wine on a dinner date over dessert etc. It is a balancing act and we all need to take responsibility for how we choose to "balance" and seek help when it becomes a problem... or if health, lifestyle, family, friends etc are impacted. Honestly, I am more likely to binge on ice cream so THAT is something I need to have pretty much abstince on.

I was raised by an angry father and had intense anger at times when i was young. The best therapy was a long walk. I also think regular exercise and physical activities ( hiking, riding) are awesome. I have always felt that the screaming, crying, punching pillows actually contributed to and activated the " fight" response so was not helpful to me. I am not sure how it happened, but my anger is way reduced now. I feel much more peace which is such a blessing.

@@Valentina I shared those beliefs until I met the surgeons at my bariatric practice. Never have I experienced the compassion, taking time to educate and encouraging realistic yet life changing results. They are tuned into the emotional issues - don't try to solve them, but do screen for them. Best of all, they believe in follow up. Lately they have been doing radio spots, which I normally detest from doctors, but the tone of theirs is awesome. It isn't just about recruiting new surgical patients, they speak about helping people get back on track in such a welcoming way. I know my surgeons are a rare breed, but I feel like primary care docs lack training in obesity and really don't know enough about metabolic disorders to fill the role. I do agree there is often a gap, especially over the long haul. I am 4 years out and haven't been seen by my bariatric team in quite awhile. I think I will go in this year because it gives me some peace of mind and because I have had a rough go of it Healthwise over the last 2 months. Bloodwork is good, but I wonder if something Is"up" or if I am just unlucky lately. Sent from my KFJWI using the BariatricPal App

My own personal experience was that specific, ongoing and comprehensive education was a key success factor. When I was banded didn't get clear education on how to manage food and I was often hungry but would vomit too easily eating dense Protein...so I gravitated towards sliders. When I revised to sleeve I specifically sought out a program that had what I knew I missed and have been very successful and maintaining too. I was very motivated both times, and had very different outcomes. I understand there are emotional, psychological issues at play too, but it it was a good procedure that initially limited my quantity capacity and hunger...and then the education over the long haul of how to keep"working the sleeve" were much more important in my case. It seems hard to believe but one of the reasons I always failed at weight management was my all consuming drive to eat, my 24/7 hunger. Once that was reduced, it became much more possible to be compliant.

I am very aware of these types of difficulties. I personally know of a woman (work colleague ) who went off the rails post bypass weight loss. She died in her sleep of organ failure in her early 40s. I was scared I would die too so I inquiries further to find she was type 1 diabetic and had become not a problem drinker but an alcoholic....a lethal combination. I almost didn't go ahead with WLS because of this. I am glad I didn't imagine this needed to be everyone's fate. I have a friend going g through separation and divorce. She got even skinnier, smoked way more and started drinking booze instead of eating. It happens to non WLS patients too. She is back on track now. Big life stressor can cause outrageous behavior - but it is the minority and help can be found. I just hope people don't avoid life saving surgery on the chance they might be the one that suffers an addiction transference. Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using the BariatricPal App

What made this interesting to me, was the specificity. Like, actual examples of the experience. I have issues, but not these, which I find oddly reassuring. Really, i don't feel guilt or even really worry about what I have eaten. I am diligent in the sense that I keep a close eye, but I don't feel the desire to punish myself with excessive exercise, for example, if I eat more than planned. In fact, I view exercise as a tool to keep my body ready to do the stuff I WANT to do like hiking, horseback riding, snowshoing, cross country skiing etc. Exercise in and of itself is not really a big focus for me anymore, it is kind of like basic hygenie I guess. I had about a 10# regain this last summer and in the past I would have faced that with one of two approaches, both essentially panic responses: - what the heck, give up, stop weighing, buy bigger pants -panic, try some program lose 30# and regain 50 Instead, I stayed calm and decided first to focus on stopping gaining. I made small changes and stabilized. Then I thought, hmmm, what do I need to do to lose a few. I made some more small changes - going back to basics of course. I am back under goal again but it took several months. This was a low stress way to address it. what I also noticed was those 10# felt horrible because my snugger jeans wouldn't zip anymore, but nobody around me even noticed. It is not like the Earth stops rotating because Jane put on 10#... there is something to be said for putting these things into perspective.

Did you do a proper flounce?

I have this fantasy of becoming an evangelist, my sermons aimed #1 at doctors #2 everyone else, to educate them on the concept of obesity as a disease process. I am no longer overweight, but I am not cured. My obesity is being managed and is in remission. I don't for a minute believe I will ever be free of the risk of regain because it is what my body wants to do. If I eat alot of sugary, carby junky food -it's like throwing kerosene on a fire and my drive to eat returns. I could have saved decades of heartache and bad health if I had had even the most basic understanding of this process.

I can get behind any kind of self acceptance/ self love movement. I seriously think the world would be a better place if more people had that inner peace and self assurance. I was never involved in FA movement so not well informed but I think they intentionally misrepresent the dangers of morbid obesity. I dated(briefly) a man who was pretty heavy, ate gross cheap ass low quality foods, and then he mentioned in passing that he'd had bypass heart surgery while scarfing down the double bacon cheeseburger... I was astounded ....that is how I think of too much acceptance of a bad health situation. Like people think a magical medication or surgery will"fix em" no matter how much we abuse our bodies. One of my many motivations for getting sleeved was the number of obese people dropping dead (local news story lead me to look up statistics). Sadly, in the years since my sleeve and losing weight I lost 40 year old niece and a 64 year old sister in law- both dropped dead of heart attack and they were very obese (probably 55-60 BMI range) Obesity is a disease process, I have no animosity toward the obese, but people have to keep trying to get weight off, or at least not gain, our very lives depend on it.

I don't recall how long it was before I felt up to it, but it was a few years before I experienced it (i assure you, I felt up to it well before 2 years!)