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About to hit the 2 year mark and no one still knows

  • Popular Post

April will mark my 2 year anniversary of my sleeve. I still haven't told anyone at work, only my immediate family knows and 2 extremely trusted friends. The comments as regarding speculation have almost gone as no one seems to even remember the "fat" me anymore. I'm now the size they see and know.

Anyone one else done this, in regards to not telling or talking about it.

I found it interesting a few weeks ago, I was playing poker and sat next to a gentleman that had done the gastric bypass. We had a very interesting conversation about the differences between his surgery and a sleeve. I could tell he was curious as to how I knew so much about it and I was able to play it off by saying a girl I used to date had done it. That was enough to stop any further pushing into how I might know so much. He was very open about it, almost to the point of bragging.

I'm not ashamed, but its not something I care to discuss with others. As the decision was an extremely personal one that came about for a variety of reasons.

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@@clifdog Congrats on your two year anniversary! I have told my husband and best friend and that's it, I don't want to tell anyone else. I'm curious how you handled going out to eat with people, especially in the early weeks and months?

Edited by Seahawkgirl

  • Author

I had my surgery done in Mexico and also discovered I'm allergic to mophine. That was a hot mess. After returning, I spent about a week in the hospital due to dehydration. I basically lived off of Protein shakes (odwalla's) for several months. I stayed away from situations in which I would be out with people in which I might have to eat in front of them. I was alot slower eating normally than I probably should have been. I can't complain though.

I do hate the fact that sometimes I feel I have no place to turn about my weight loss. Wife isn't happy she's now the biggest person in the house. I read that it can cause problems, now I'm seeing the effects of being not the "big" one anymore. It's not the reward I thought it'd be.

I told no one about surgery beforehand, and I told my three best friends afterward. I am 16 months out and those three are the only ones that know. I think it's a personal decision and something that you have the right to keep to yourself.

Congrats on your success!

  • Author

One of the funniest comments I have received was from a custodian in the building I work at. She came up to me and said Mr Clifdog. I had to look up and old picture of you because I have forgotten how big you used to be. I know it was a compliment, but it still ranks as one of the most curious ones ever.

@@clifdog great work buddy. I am 5 months out. still no one knows besides my wife. I love that!!!

I started out not telling anyone except my immediate family and a close friend - I was afraid to tell people because I was worried it might not work or I wasn't going to loose enough weight or God knows what else --- but now at about 8-1/2 months out and 110 lbs lost, I've begun to tell people. Especially those who sincerely ask about how I lost weight and I think would benefit from knowing what I've done.

People that knew me but I hadn't told and watched me loosing the weight - kinda knew something was up but didn't press the issue until I was ready to talk about it.

No one that I've now told has had a bad word to say - actually most have said that it's great that I took control and did what ever I needed to do to loose the weight.

It's an individual decision - do what feels right to you.

Happy anniversary! Not a single person knows about my surgery other than all the bariatric pal folks! No family, no friends, no coworkers. I am 2 weeks out today and seem to be doing well.

I have my first event where I will be eating with people in a week and a half so I'm going to have to mentally prepare for that. Perhaps just getting over a stomach bug if any comments are made. It IS winter after all.

  • Author

I remember my first event post surgery. I was scared to death. Looking back, I hardly had anything on my plate, didn't know any of the tricks as it were to hiding the amount of food I ate. I shuffled a piece of chicken i had pulled apart on my plate for a half hour.. LOL..

I've gotten much better of course, but now its experience.

I haven't told a single friend, family member, or coworker myself. Only ones who know is the doctor and his staff. Only needed a week off and I went back to work today. I hate lying but its deeply personal to me and I don't need anyone giving me grief about the money I've spent to have the sleeve done. Comforting to know there's others out there like me!

  • 2 weeks later...

I tell people. Im hoping someone else is on the fence or wants to know about it so I can help them. That's what happened to me. I was discussing a friends surgery and the issues of being fat and she really helped me make a decision. If I had not known she did it I would never have asked and would not be where I sit today.

I was open about it with everyone from the start. Of course some people were ohh you don't need it you should just go on a diet and excersice. But i was open about it for a few reasons. one i'm the type of person that i don't really care what other people think as i did this for me and my family. My wife had her sleeve a week after me. Second there are many people out there that don't know much about the process and maybe have only heard from people that haven't experienced the process and might be steered away from doing it for themselves. I know my wife and i have inspired a few people to start their own journey by being open about everything. We went to an event for our surgergeons office and met acouple that decided to start their journey based on our story on the surgeons web page. for us this is why were open about our journeys. If we can help anyone start their new life and journey it is worth all the ignorant comments and stupid stereotypes we hear. which is not very many really anymore as were both over 2 years out and some people have never known us bigger. i understand why keeping it secret though don't misunderstand we have a friend that still doesn't tel many people but i find usually it is harder for women as they tend to be judged harsher by other women and then some tend to get jealous when they become smaller than their friends. my wife has lost a few friends that way.

  • 2 weeks later...

Got the band at 30 and only told wife and 2 best friends. When I would be at a restaurant with coworkers I would just order a thin Soup and Water I greatly reduced the risk of "problems". If asked why I wasn't eating much I would always pat my gut and say "Oh, just trying to cut back a little". And that was that.

Band had to come out at 38 due to complications. Now, I 40 I am going back to have a sleeve put in today. Plan on telling is the same.

At 28 a man that worked the same place as me but in a difft. Area (I barely knew him), had WLS and had told people. One day he came in to the area I was working and made a delivery. Anyway, as soon as he left most of the 8-10 people in that area started talking about him, speculating how much he had lost, how much they heard it cost, why doesn't he buy some new pants that fit right, why didn't he just "hit the gym" instead of surgery. Etc.... That is when I decided I would keep it close to the chest.

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