Will I still enjoy cooking for my family post surgery?

[Engteacher 158]

Hello, Everyone!

I had my first visit with a dietician yesterday and am on track for a surgery date by mid-January. I'm 54, have been married for 32 years, my husband is athletic and maintains a normal weight. He's very supportive, but is worried. It is, after all, a very big step and my weight has crept up five pounds a year for the past two decades. Dropping twenty or thirty pounds every few years, just to have it creep back up, no longer is possible given the arthritis in my knees, so it's time to try a new tool now that I have a BMI of 40+.

I have always done the cooking and meal planning during the week and have seen myself as a bit of a foodie - a proud member of the whole slow food movement. My husband enjoys cooking on the weekend. We raise our own chicken for the freezer and have friends who sell us lamb and beef.

We love being in the kitchen together and after more than thirty years, we worry about how that will all change.

Traditional family meals and favorite recipes may or may not be foods I can tolerate well. My guess is that I'll be able to eat part of the meal or else will make something that I can eat. We grill a lot, and steak with baked potato just won't fly with my new stomach, for example.

In our discussions, this is a big concern for my family. Will I still feel good about cooking when I can't/won't be eating the food I prepare?

I saw a similar thread, but it was last active more than a year ago. Time to ask again, will I still enjoy cooking for my family post surgery?

[MichiganChic 3,262]

There's no way to know how you'll feel after surgery, but for me, I don't cook much as I used to. I used to love to cook, and I worked part time, so I cooked great meals almost every day, and had big family gatherings every chance I got. I loved to bake, too. I was always trying new things, and just loved to feed people, including me. I always had too much food, too. And usually, there was no expense (calories/fat) spared in any of it. Of course, I would alternate that with periodic attempts at weight loss, often for a year or more at a time, where I would prepare healthy meals. However, I was still pretty focused on food, and it took all of my energy.

So, when I had my sleeve, I had to make a conscious effort to back away from the food. I try to limit the amount of time and effort I put into food planning and preparation. I still cook some, and I entertain some, too, just not as often. And when I do, I think about things that work into my eating plan, and I usually don't have the abundance of food in terms of quantity and choices I used to. So far, no one is suffering from that I have only baked once in the last 2 years. That was a huge change, because I used to bake several times a week. No one is worse off for that, either.

It was a choice I made. I knew that if I continued with that lifestyle, I would not be successful. I don't know how you'll do, but for me, spending so much time and energy on food is a disaster. Even now, when I cook, I tend to sample what I'm preparing, and I over eat sometimes. From a reformed foodie, I say it was an excellent trade for me. I found other things to occupy my time, and now I don't really miss it. You said your husband is athletic, so you might find other ways to spend your time if you decide cooking isn't worth it to you, either.

[borg/assimilated 576]

Engteacher,

I am a little concerned about this too as I am the planner, shopper and preparer of all our meals in our household. My family has always enjoyed the things I cook, bake. I have cut back some already since we are now empty nesters, but my husband has a healthy appetite and loves my cooking. He will be be in for a shock! His idea of cooking is to open up a can and heat the contents up in the microwave.

[Thenewnic 139]

Hi

My mother worried about the same thing prior to being sleeved three years ago. It was tough for her probably for the first six weeks and then she was back in the kitchen cooking with my father like they always have. She is three years postop op and has maintained 140+ weight loss. Looking back, I actually feel bad because she even cooked Christmas that year and had just completed surgery within like three or four months. She's my hero. Much luck in making your decision.

[4me4them 381]

I also thought hard about this question. I love to cook! I like to think about the menu for the week, find new recipes....the whole enchilada (pun intended). So here's my plan, I'm already looking for things that I can cook that are now going to fit my new lifestyle. Yesterday I found a chicken stock recipe (the canned stuff is awful) that I will make this weekend and freeze in an ice cube tray (perfect 1 oz portions) and I have two recipes for when I can move on to cream Soups...one is a pumpkin Soup that is really low fat!

So I guess my approach is that I will eventually return to cooking for me and my guys (husband and adult brother). I will just cook different things most of the time and save the unhealthy stuff for the very rare splurge....and even then try to healthen it up a bit

[par1959 470]

Keep in mind this surgery and the change of life style that comes with it, is all about you. You will need to chose between cooking for others or doing whats best for you. If your sucessful you will have a totally different relationship with food and want to stay out of the tempting kitchen. Easy snacky stuff becomes evil if you want to succeed. This is not to say you cant cook a meal or have the occational treat, but it will be a different meal with yourself in mind and treats are few and far between. Throw out the grain and potatoe based food. Those type of carbs are now a thing of the past. If you cant do this, dont have the surgery. Its not easy, but it can be worth it. I love my new self and have become very awake to what my old habits did to me.

[MisforMimi 760]

Phew! Glad I'm not the only one who is an admitted foodie. I love local, good quality, organic when I when I afford it. Love the neighborhood farmers markets. I cook all of the meals, it is our division of labor. My spouse has been unemployed and that has taken the some of the load/joy off and it's nice to come home to some delicious paleo slow cooker that we will all be able to enjoy. Combined with a bread (for them) and/or salad and veggies, they are meals I'm confident I can enjoy after surgery.

I'm a member of a small foodie-ish potluck group that meets quarterly, that I love. Overindulgence is not the focus and I'm the largest person in the group. We pick a different country cuisine each time. I hope I can still enjoy those.

It's funny how this is my last holiday season before surgery and I'm still not looking forward to it. I'm completely uninspired to cook, and Celebrate actually. Hmmm.....

Edited November 11, 2014 by MisforMimi

[RJ'S/beginning 5,357]

For me I cook more. It takes time for me to plan healthy meals with a new spin on it. More legumes and fish and always trying something new. I make healthy choices most of the time now and to learn to eat more things that are high in Protein is not just about meat. There are other choices out there and I have been searching for them.

Nothing with artificial sugar. Learning to cook with other sweeteners as well as different kinds of rice, Beans and yes even pastas.

I use tofu which I used to think was the devil itself. And enjoy the Mexican burger. Great in chili. No for me it is more important now then ever to eat better and so I have expanded my search and cooking skills to include more fish and poultry.

Fresh from the farmers mostly! Love it!

Edited November 11, 2014 by RJ'S/beginning

[Engteacher 158]

Thank you for sharing your experiences. While it's impossible to know how I'll feel post surgery, it's good to hear that others have managed to find a balance in the midst of such a big change. It's funny that I am more preoccupied with the social aspects of preparing the food than the social aspect of consuming the food. I might have to explore this with the psychologist as I define myself, in part, as a darn good cook. I have two visits pre-surgery, so it might be worth talking about with him/her.

Seriously, if you were having a pot-luck, I'd be one you would want to invite. "Just sayin'," as my daughter always says. main dishes, salads, Desserts...i can put on a heck of a spread.

Well, we won't know till we get there, right?

Chin up. March on.

[glitter eyes 1,398]

I didn't really like to cook before my surgery. I cooked for my family, but it wasn't one of my favorite things to do. I almost never baked. Post surgery I love to cook. I also love to bake for others. I think since I can't eat things with high carbs and fat I enjoy watching other people eat them. My entire family is normal weight and can eat anything without gaining weight. When I cook their meals I make sure I have some type of lean Protein for myself, but enjoy cooking all their favorites. Every once in awhile I wish I could have a helping of Mac and cheese, noodles, bread, etc. but it passes quickly. I am 4 1/2 months post op.

[BigGirlPanties 957]

@RJ'S/beginning once again we are in sync ... I was not much of a "domestic goddess"...I guess I'm still not...but I enjoy making things now... I made a spaghetti bake the other day with spaghetti squash and diced up tofu (yes I never thought I'd eat that stuff either) into the ricotta and no one knew it was there! It is the way I'm going to do spaghetti squash from now on. I love parmesan chips, and cooking with cauliflower instead of potatoes...even my husband loves smashed cauliflower instead of potatoes

(don't know what's going on with my computer) it's entering things weird.........................................

Our focus now is on the company and not the food!

[Julie norton 2,850]

My relationship with food changed dramatically. It truly hardly interests me. I don't shop often. I eat my favorites. Lots of Protein of course but cooking for one is sometimes difficult. I will make a batch of Soup or stew. But cook only one to two chicken thighs at once. Simple. Easy clean. Out of the kitchen.

Don't underestimate the amount of time spent thinking. Planning. Shopping. Prep- cooking. Serving. Clean up. After many years post op I just can't and won't give that much energy to food.

I do bake my kids birthday cakes. And I will do easy thanksgiving. (Huge turkey breast). Plus Jello and veges and sweet potatoes. But not finding true joy in food anymore. Any others feel this way? Hope I'm not the only one!

[RJ'S/beginning 5,357]

My relationship with food changed dramatically. It truly hardly interests me. I don't shop often. I eat my favorites. Lots of Protein of course but cooking for one is sometimes difficult. I will make a batch of Soup or stew. But cook only one to two chicken thighs at once. Simple. Easy clean. Out of the kitchen.

Don't underestimate the amount of time spent thinking. Planning. Shopping. Prep- cooking. Serving. Clean up. After many years post op I just can't and won't give that much energy to food.< /p>

I do bake my kids birthday cakes. And I will do easy thanksgiving. (Huge turkey breast). Plus Jello and veges and sweet potatoes. But not finding true joy in food anymore. Any others feel this way? Hope I'm not the only one!

2006.....you are now one of my hero's..... congrats on the many years of success...I hope I will do it as well. That's the plan anyway!

[BigGirlPanties 957]

btw...gotta just say...

I bought a microwave pressure cooker from QVC...I LOVE it!

I can cook 2 lbs of chicken thighs with a myriad of sauces in about 20 minutes (as an example) ... quick and easy!!! My kind of cooking lol

great recipes included

[alwaysvegas 702]

Don't forget that what you put in your mouth after surgery is still a choice. Don't think of what you can and can't eat...think of what you choose to eat.