Many of you on here know me well, I have been a part of these message boards for years. I love our members and I want only the best for them. Therefore, I can not in good conscience keep this to myself any longer.

Dr. Illan is a wonderful surgeon. In fact, when I used to coordinate, for a while I actually referred patients to him. His coordinator, Omar, has a very, very faithful following. So much so, I fully expect and am prepared for the "verbal beating" I am going to get for going public with what I know. But, if I prevent just one woman from experiencing what I am about to share with you, then it will all be worth it.

As I said, Omar is very well loved among the patients, especially the ladies. He goes out of his way to ensure everyone has a great experience while there. He provides for the patient's every need, transports them around town, runs errands for them, sits by their bedside and so much more. He is very charming and charismatic. There will be many, many members who will respond to this thread stating just that. In fact, when the first patient, one that I had referred to them, approached me about what happened to her, I did her a horrible disservice by not really believing what she told me, because Omar did such a good job of convincing me otherwise. But now, after six woman, some of whom I referred to Dr. Illan, some not, have contacted me regarding what happened to them, I know now that first patient was telling me the truth, she did not misinterpret anything and I must speak out.

So, what is it that I am speaking off? I am talking about taking advantage of woman who have traveled to a foreign country by themselves, most likely have low self-esteem due to their weight issues, they are scared and they are lonely. Then, along comes Omar. He is by their side throughout their stay. He is, as I said before, charming and charismatic. They very quickly find themselves falling victim to him, and he takes advantage of them in several different ways. He either is sexually suggestive to them, sexually inappropriate, or convinces these woman he truly cares for/loves them and begins a romantic relationship with them. Because of how vulnerable they are, they believe he really does care about them, and they allow themselves to be wooed by him and have a romantic and/or sexual relationship with him. Then, shortly after, he basically dumps them. He quits responding to their calls, texts, etc. He leaves these woman feeling broken and foolish for falling for him. They feel like they have done something wrong, when in fact, they are merely the victim of a heartless man taking extreme advantage of his position and their vulnerability. Understand, I am not saying this happens with every patient, but it does happen and it shows an extreme lack of professionalism and moral character.

I have attempted to contact Dr. Illan to speak with him personally about this. Unfortunately, Omar makes that nearly impossible. All calls, emails, etc. are intercepted by him. And, here is the saddest part of all, Dr. Illan already knows what is going on. So, I am doubtful my talking to him would make a difference. Dr. Illan knows Omar has a strong fan base, and therefore, brings him a great deal of business. So, he turns a blind eye to what is happening. Which, is why I have no guilt in publicly coming out and sharing what I know. I will be honest, my goal here is to have Omar removed from his position as coordinator with Baja Bariatrics and Dr. Illan, and to see that he does not work in this field or any other field where he can take advantage of woman again. And, if Dr. Illan goes down as a result, well, shame on him for allowing it to happen in the first place.

Okay, here goes nothing.

 

I had surgery with Dr. Illan. I also had a fling with Omar. I have gone back and forth with this for days now trying to figure out which "side" to be on. Truthfully, I am still struggling with that decision.

 

I went to TJ a little nervous and a lot excited about my new life. I never intended to end up liking Omar, but in person, he is so charismatic, very friendly, honestly caring, and extremely well dressed. Once I got out of the hospital and in the hotel, he had me. Hook. Line. Sinker. Here is the deal, I WANTED HIM. I was not forced or coerced. I was not taken advantage of at all. I do not believe he is a predator. I do however believe he is a PLAYER.

 

I saw first hand how women react to him. He is a very typical man. Not an excuse, just a statement of fact. Give me an example of a man who wouldn't enjoy attention, expensive gifts, and women asking him if they can preform oral sex. I am not making an excuse for him!! I am not a team illan groupie. I am not even on Facebook. I am not missing the forest because of the trees. I am not so crazy in love with him that I am blinded by his actions. I agree that he should absolutely NOT be messing around with patients. Not even a tiny bit! However, I do believe that once you leave TJ, you are not considered a patient any longer. If you decide to go back and see Omar, then that is on YOU. If you take him expensive gifts (or cheap gifts) then that is on YOU. If you have intercourse with him then that is on YOU. If you go back to TJ to see another doctor or dentist, then you are not a patient of Baja Bariatrics.

 

YOU just have to realize that Omar is a player. You will not be his first. You will not be his last...no matter what he says. Did you women not date in college? A good man is hard to find. They are very few and far between. Even Dr. Phil said no man is 100% perfect. If you can find one who is 80%, you better hold on, because that is as good as it gets.

 

I am not bad mouthing anyone. I think it is right and fair for everyone to share their opinions. Free country!

 

I think that his past is just that. His past. A lot of you don't want your past to get in the way of your future. Let it go.

 

Omar is guilty of being a player. A pretty big one. As long as he stops messing with patients while they are patients, then I say go for it big guy.

 

What I am trying to say is, I'm sorry he hurt some of you. I truly am. But come on, did you really think you were going to have a long distance relationship with him? Really?

 

I guess I just decided which "side" I am on. I can't help it. I know how men are. If you want to play the game, you HAVE to be prepared to lose. Either that, or make sure you win. I did. I played a player. And I had soooooooo much fun In the process.

 

Hate the game. Not the player.

Darn - are you Mastrata or whoever she is with a different ploy?  This is getting utterly ridiculous.    Omar, is this you?  This is making me SICK, THE ABSURDITY OF IT.

BTW Bwhite, you had sooooooooooooo much fun with Omar as you say.  Have you had your HIV test yet?

LindafromFlorida,

There is no reason to be mean and hateful. It makes you look scorned, ugly, and jealous. I was just voicing my opinion.

BTW Bwhite, you had sooooooooooooo much fun with Omar as you say. Have you had your HIV test yet?

That's not fair! She can have sex with whoever she chooses and your comment is shaming. It might not be your choice...but it's hers and really, you don't have any say in the matter.

Bwhite,

Thanks for telling your story, and telling it well.

Sounds like you are a person who knew what she was getting into and leapt in readily.

It certainly adds to the portrait of The Fabulous Omar. He is one helluva snake charmer.

VSGAnn2014 and Shellief,

Thank you for your support. It was not easy reading all the posts. It was not easy trying to decide if I had been "played" or not. I did a lot of thinking and a lot of praying, and a lot of discussing it with my bff and with Omar.

I had to come to the realization that I am a big girl and I am ultimately in control of my decisions. Just like every other adult on this site. We can blame Omar all we want. I really wanted to. I did. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized I am just in it to have fun. Nothing more. So why not go back and forth to TJ to see him and take him nice things? I can afford it!!

He said nice things to me. He paid extra attention to me. He didn't drug me or force me to do anything. Ladies, he is a full blown player. Either deal with it or don't play the freaking game. It is YOUR choice.

Bwhite said:

VSGAnn2014 and Shellief,

Thank you for your support. It was not easy reading all the posts. It was not easy trying to decide if I had been "played" or not. I did a lot of thinking and a lot of praying, and a lot of discussing it with my bff and with Omar.

I had to come to the realization that I am a big girl and I am ultimately in control of my decisions. Just like every other adult on this site. We can blame Omar all we want. I really wanted to. I did. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized I am just in it to have fun. Nothing more. So why not go back and forth to TJ to see him and take him nice things? I can afford it!!

He said nice things to me. He paid extra attention to me. He didn't drug me or force me to do anything. Ladies, he is a full blown player. Either deal with it or don't play the freaking game. It is YOUR choice.

Bwhite,

Here's where we differ. You're a woman of the world -- a "big girl" to use your terms. Fair enough. In your case, no harm, no foul. You found the game worthwhile, and you played a player. Again, fair enough.

But everyone who got played by The Fabulous Omar doesn't have the same emotional resources, background, and resilience that you do. Not everyone who's a bariatric patient is in an informed position to consider carefully their responses within 24 hours post-surgery to a "player" who comes onto them hard and strong.

And that is why there are rules against players like Omar playing medical patients. In some countries (most countries?) there are actual laws against it. But in every situation, there are (in my opinion -- everyone obviously doesn't agree with me) moral rules against taking advantage of people to satisfy your own interests when they are IN YOUR CARE. And no one can say that during the medical experience one undergoes as a patient of Dr. Illan that they are not in the medical care of The Fabulous Omar.

See, that's my beef about this. Who is it that does the calculation that Patient X will be damaged by Omar's seductions and Patient Y will not be damaged by Omar's seductions? Obviously, The Fabulous Omar isn't in a position to do that and doesn't even attempt it.

He may be a player, to use your term. But in my book, being a player has a lot of manipulative, nasty aspects to the term. He's a lot of other things, too. He's a gigolo who seeks the most he can get (sexually and financially) for his services. And he's a nasty piece of work.

So I fall on the side of those here who think Dr. Illan should fire The Fabulous Omar's ass. One of these ladies who fell prey to his charms and wasn't a player may wind up filing charges against Dr. Illan. If so, they'll probably be motivated by a range of emotions to do so. But they may very well have the law on their side, too.

Dr. Illan, you're crazy if you keep Omar on your staff. If he's determined to make his living this way, let him work your patients from across the street.

Edited July 19, 201412 yr by VSGAnn2014

If you look up his convictions, the only conviction he has is that he is an illegal that was trying to stay with his family in the US. He was convicted of felony charges for being an illegal in 2006/2007. He served his time and has been in Mexico ever since. Everyone on this board should judge him based on that. There is nothing more to these accusations.

 

The "groupies", "current women of the month", "passioned patients", "fanclub" should be done with this thread. Everything they say is being discounted, bashed and bullied by people that are incapable of seeking the actual truth and believing no name supposed women that very easily and recently created profiles just to stir the pot for this website's profit.

 

Sorry, I don't believe this.  Merely being in the country illegally is not something they put you in prison for and call you a felon.  Are you sure his GANG affiliations had nothing to do with his prison time?  The taxpayers have paid dearly for him, I hope he rots in Mexico.

 

Okay, here goes nothing.

 

I had surgery with Dr. Illan. I also had a fling with Omar. I have gone back and forth with this for days now trying to figure out which "side" to be on. Truthfully, I am still struggling with that decision.

 

I went to TJ a little nervous and a lot excited about my new life. I never intended to end up liking Omar, but in person, he is so charismatic, very friendly, honestly caring, and extremely well dressed. Once I got out of the hospital and in the hotel, he had me. Hook. Line. Sinker. Here is the deal, I WANTED HIM. I was not forced or coerced. I was not taken advantage of at all. I do not believe he is a predator. I do however believe he is a PLAYER.

 

I saw first hand how women react to him. He is a very typical man. Not an excuse, just a statement of fact. Give me an example of a man who wouldn't enjoy attention, expensive gifts, and women asking him if they can preform oral sex. I am not making an excuse for him!! I am not a team illan groupie. I am not even on Facebook. I am not missing the forest because of the trees. I am not so crazy in love with him that I am blinded by his actions. I agree that he should absolutely NOT be messing around with patients. Not even a tiny bit! However, I do believe that once you leave TJ, you are not considered a patient any longer. If you decide to go back and see Omar, then that is on YOU. If you take him expensive gifts (or cheap gifts) then that is on YOU. If you have intercourse with him then that is on YOU. If you go back to TJ to see another doctor or dentist, then you are not a patient of Baja Bariatrics.

 

YOU just have to realize that Omar is a player. You will not be his first. You will not be his last...no matter what he says. Did you women not date in college? A good man is hard to find. They are very few and far between. Even Dr. Phil said no man is 100% perfect. If you can find one who is 80%, you better hold on, because that is as good as it gets.

 

I am not bad mouthing anyone. I think it is right and fair for everyone to share their opinions. Free country!

 

I think that his past is just that. His past. A lot of you don't want your past to get in the way of your future. Let it go.

 

Omar is guilty of being a player. A pretty big one. As long as he stops messing with patients while they are patients, then I say go for it big guy.

 

What I am trying to say is, I'm sorry he hurt some of you. I truly am. But come on, did you really think you were going to have a long distance relationship with him? Really?

 

I guess I just decided which "side" I am on. I can't help it. I know how men are. If you want to play the game, you HAVE to be prepared to lose. Either that, or make sure you win. I did. I played a player. And I had soooooooo much fun In the process.

 

Hate the game. Not the player.

 

You were in a hotel in TJ after surgery so you were a patient.  It's not like you went to TJ to visit him, you were a patient.

 

Question for you, what other Medical Ethics are okay for Omar to disregard?  I mean, the rules don't apply to him so what else shall we excuse regarding Omar's behavior?  It doesn't matter one single itty bitty iota if you were willing or not.  It changes nothing.  HE should have had enough respect for you and his job to keep his penis where it belonged.  But he doesn't, he doesn't respect anything or anyone.  Honestly, the more I read the more disgusted I am with Illan.  I came here without strong opinions of Illan one way or another.  I have very strong opinions now.  Now I am just becoming angry.

 

Sorry, your defense of Omar is to hate the game, not the player.  You honestly don't understand the seriousness of this.  I actually don't hate the game, to each his own.  The player, he needs to be dealt with by Illan or I am pretty sure people are left with going after Illan.

 

VSGAnn2014 and Shellief,

 

Thank you for your support. It was not easy reading all the posts. It was not easy trying to decide if I had been "played" or not. I did a lot of thinking and a lot of praying, and a lot of discussing it with my bff and with Omar.

 

I had to come to the realization that I am a big girl and I am ultimately in control of my decisions. Just like every other adult on this site. We can blame Omar all we want. I really wanted to. I did. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized I am just in it to have fun. Nothing more. So why not go back and forth to TJ to see him and take him nice things? I can afford it!!

 

He said nice things to me. He paid extra attention to me. He didn't drug me or force me to do anything. Ladies, he is a full blown player. Either deal with it or don't play the freaking game. It is YOUR choice.

 

It shouldn't even be your choice.  That's what you don't get.  MEDICAL ETHICS!  It's something that matters to the rest of the world.  Omar shouldn't even have given you the opportunity.

 

Honestly, this isn't rocket science.

To be clear - I support everyone telling their story and no one being blamed or shamed for that story. The name calling etc does no one any good. What I'm pointing to is that in your experience you were not taken advantage of by Omar. Others feel like they were victimized by him. Your positive experience does not negate their negative experience. And vice versa.

Edited July 19, 201412 yr by shellief

Okay, here goes nothing.

I had surgery with Dr. Illan. I also had a fling with Omar. I have gone back and forth with this for days now trying to figure out which "side" to be on. Truthfully, I am still struggling with that decision.

I went to TJ a little nervous and a lot excited about my new life. I never intended to end up liking Omar, but in person, he is so charismatic, very friendly, honestly caring, and extremely well dressed. Once I got out of the hospital and in the hotel, he had me. Hook. Line. Sinker. Here is the deal, I WANTED HIM. I was not forced or coerced. I was not taken advantage of at all. I do not believe he is a predator. I do however believe he is a PLAYER.

I saw first hand how women react to him. He is a very typical man. Not an excuse, just a statement of fact. Give me an example of a man who wouldn't enjoy attention, expensive gifts, and women asking him if they can preform oral sex. I am not making an excuse for him!! I am not a team illan groupie. I am not even on Facebook. I am not missing the forest because of the trees. I am not so crazy in love with him that I am blinded by his actions. I agree that he should absolutely NOT be messing around with patients. Not even a tiny bit! However, I do believe that once you leave TJ, you are not considered a patient any longer. If you decide to go back and see Omar, then that is on YOU. If you take him expensive gifts (or cheap gifts) then that is on YOU. If you have intercourse with him then that is on YOU. If you go back to TJ to see another doctor or dentist, then you are not a patient of Baja Bariatrics.

YOU just have to realize that Omar is a player. You will not be his first. You will not be his last...no matter what he says. Did you women not date in college? A good man is hard to find. They are very few and far between. Even Dr. Phil said no man is 100% perfect. If you can find one who is 80%, you better hold on, because that is as good as it gets.

I am not bad mouthing anyone. I think it is right and fair for everyone to share their opinions. Free country!

I think that his past is just that. His past. A lot of you don't want your past to get in the way of your future. Let it go.

Omar is guilty of being a player. A pretty big one. As long as he stops messing with patients while they are patients, then I say go for it big guy.

What I am trying to say is, I'm sorry he hurt some of you. I truly am. But come on, did you really think you were going to have a long distance relationship with him? Really?

I guess I just decided which "side" I am on. I can't help it. I know how men are. If you want to play the game, you HAVE to be prepared to lose. Either that, or make sure you win. I did. I played a player. And I had soooooooo much fun In the process.

Hate the game. Not the player.

I appreciate your story and commend you for realizing what you were getting into and "playing the game" anyways. That said, you say he's a typical man? Uhm... no. Not so much. If this is the type of man that is typical in YOUR life, I feel for you and I say that with all sincerity.

I've met very few men in my life (once past the sorority/fraternity days) that this behavior is typical of. In fact, most men I know prefer to be with one woman, in a loving partnership, having outgrown the "player" stage while in college. In fact, even when living in the sorority house, the "players" were far less common than the REAL men, those who actually had respect for the women in their lives.

"Men" who act like you've described are nothing more than self centered narcissistic children, and that's OK, as long as they are not breaking any ethical codes, which I do believe is the issue here. REAL men are a whole 'nother breed.

Thank you to BP for allowing us to proceed here. No matter the disagreements, this needs to be aired.

I hate the player. I am disgusted by him. Some may have been willing participants of his shenanigans, but not all are. You don't randomly go into a patients room and start discussing your genitals for no reason. If you are a professional, you never have a relationship other than one of a professional nature with your patients. It is unethical to do that, it is unethical to accept gifts. There is no excuse for it.

And, I'm sorry. I must add this. Why, in this day and age with all the diseases out there would any intelligent person want to involve themselves in a casual sex relationship with someone who will sleep with any woman willing to spread her legs for him? Goodness, my health and self-respect are much more valuable to me than that.

I'm not a medical professional and certainly not an anesthesiologist and don't have any idea what anesthetics are used during bariatric surgery by Dr. Illan's practice.

But one thing I've been wondering about on this thread is whether being anesthetized during surgery might impact a patient's judgment for some time afterward.

There are many statements like this on medical sites:

What are possible side effects of anesthesia?

• Impaired coordination or judgment can result due to the effect general anesthetics can have on the central nervous system. You may feel drowsy, weak or tired for several days and have blurred vision and fuzzy thinking. You should not drive, operate machinery, or perform other activities that could endanger yourself or others for 24 hours or longer.

http://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/howard_county_general_hospital/services/surgery/anesthesiology.html/anesthesia_options_risks_and_side_effects.html

I don't know that everyone's judgment is affected after anesthesia or to what extent. But statements like those quoted above are just more logic as to why The Fabulous Omar and other predators (or "players") like him should not be allowed anywhere near surgical patients.

Edited July 19, 201412 yr by VSGAnn2014

I'm not a medical professional and certainly not an anesthesiologist and don't have any idea what anesthetics are used during bariatric surgery by Dr. Illan's practice. But one thing I've been wondering about on this thread is whether being anesthetized during surgery might impact a patient's judgment for some time afterward. There are many statements like this on medical sites: What are possible side effects of anesthesia? Impaired coordination or judgment can result due to the effect general anesthetics can have on the central nervous system. You may feel drowsy, weak or tired for several days and have blurred vision and fuzzy thinking. You should not drive, operate machinery, or perform other activities that could endanger yourself or others for 24 hours or longer. http://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/howard_county_general_hospital/services/surgery/anesthesiology.html/anesthesia_options_risks_and_side_effects.html I don't know that everyone's judgment is affected after anesthesia or to what extent. But statements like those quoted above are just more logic as to why The Fabulous Omar and other predators (or "players") like him should not be allowed anywhere near surgical patients.

Very, very good point. And someone like Omar is probably very aware of those effects and use them to his advantage.

And now. I leave you all to it till Sunday. Bill and I are at our first ever BBQ competition. Will be up most of the night tending the smoker.