Hi everyone, I had my surgery on Thursday and everything is going well so far, it gets better day by day. Now I'm sure this question has been asked before BUT what did you tell people especially your work. I chose not to tell anyone at work about my decision mainly because it's personal and none of their business but also because of the rude fat comments I hear the directors make all of the time (one made at me a couple of years ago). My friend text me and said the directors have brought up my "mystery surgery" in front of 70 people. I'm not happy !!! I have no issue telling people to mind their own business but I have our national conference coming up in a couple if weeks and feel a little weird about going out for dinner with everyone. What did you tell your work colleagues?

Ok I've had a long gluttonous weekend and my mood is foul...

First off this argument is as old as the hills around here. So played out I can't believe I'm responding.

Second, there is nothing wrong in either way..

Third, if you lose the weight then try to sell profit mislead, like selling weight loss pills, wraps, or a gyms before and after THEN ITS LYING!

Fourth? Who gives a flying f**k..

Ok told you I was foul...

Red wine, moonshine and cupcakes don't mix 0_0

I told my immediate supervisor at the time that I was having hernia surgery (I was diagnosed with a hiatal hernia pre-op). The reason I did not say VSG is because I knew he would blab and he did. My point is I know my workplace as you know yours. Say whatever makes you comfortable and leave it at that.

Ok I've had a long gluttonous weekend and my mood is foul...

First off this argument is as old as the hills around here. So played out I can't believe I'm responding.

Second' date=' there is nothing wrong in either way..

Third, if you lose the weight then try to sell profit mislead, like selling weight loss pills, wraps, or a gyms before and after THEN ITS LYING!

Fourth? Who gives a flying f**k..

Ok told you I was foul...

Red wine, moonshine and cupcakes don't mix 0_0[/quote']

. . . And that is why I LOVE LAURA-VEN!!!

I saw a quote in my daughter's school this weekend: "The kindest word in all the world is the unkind word, unsaid". That being said, I am tired too, PMSing, and in another damned three week stall so I may be slightly iritable. Honesty and kindness are not always mutually exclusive; they just don't always fit together neatly. I totally agree with you Laura (as I often do). To each their own. And certainly, anyone trying to profit by lying or omission is just plain wrong. I have no desire to argue with anyone - just to inform people that may not intend to be offensive that it is. If the intent is to offend or people don't care - they should feel free to offend away. If the intent is not to offend or they do care - perhaps they may want to rethink the language used. I have no idea why this thing is underlining everything I say but I can't make it stop!!!

Ok I've had a long gluttonous weekend and my mood is foul... First off this argument is as old as the hills around here. So played out I can't believe I'm responding. Second' date=' there is nothing wrong in either way.. Third, if you lose the weight then try to sell profit mislead, like selling weight loss pills, wraps, or a gyms before and after THEN ITS LYING! Fourth? Who gives a flying f**k.. Ok told you I was foul... Red wine, moonshine and cupcakes don't mix 0_0[/quote']

:-P

Ok I've had a long gluttonous weekend and my mood is foul... First off this argument is as old as the hills around here. So played out I can't believe I'm responding. Second' date=' there is nothing wrong in either way.. Third, if you lose the weight then try to sell profit mislead, like selling weight loss pills, wraps, or a gyms before and after THEN ITS LYING! Fourth? Who gives a flying f**k.. Ok told you I was foul... Red wine, moonshine and cupcakes don't mix 0_0[/quote']

You're Just being honest, Laura!! and stay away from that deadly combo!! ;-P

Initially I told my Mom, Dad, and Sister. I come from a family of lawyers so they all went immediately into protective mode. My sister wanted the name of the anesthesiologist so that she could access her law enforcement database and run a background check on him. My mother wanted to fly in to meet with the doctor and both my parents wanted to look into whether he had been sued before. I didn't need all that anxiety and stress so I told them I changed my mind. I told them three months post-op that I had the surgery.

Off-topic, but your family of lawyers cracks me up and I love how you handled them!

Off-topic, but your family of lawyers cracks me up and I love how you handled them!

LOL. I'm one and married to one too! You cannot imagine the maneuvering involved in regular family business!

I told the truth.

I refuse to give people any power over me by feeling I have to lie and hide.

If you really don't want anyone to know then choose silence. I do not advocate lies or misleading people. If one of your asinine directors gets nosey then freeze them with a frosty glare and say its a private matter.

Guess what. People will gossip with or without fuel. When you lie, you are apart of it to some extent.

Just my 2 cents.

Okay. So I wanted to take another look at this and make sure my PMS wasn't getting the best of me. Evidently it is. Amanda Rae, I don't really think we are disagreeing or arguing about anything. I agree with almost everything you said. As Laura ven said, there have been a number of these threads running the last few days and the shame issue keeps coming up. That is all I was responding to and not your post in particular. As I look at this thread again, based upon what the OP said, the people in her workplace seem deserving of whatever sarcasm or icy glare she chooses to give them. They sound like a bunch of aholes.

Ok I've had a long gluttonous weekend and my mood is foul...

First off this argument is as old as the hills around here. So played out I can't believe I'm responding.

Second, there is nothing wrong in either way..

Third, if you lose the weight then try to sell profit mislead, like selling weight loss pills, wraps, or a gyms before and after THEN ITS LYING!

Fourth? Who gives a flying f**k..

Ok told you I was foul...

Red wine, moonshine and cupcakes don't mix 0_0

So you consider my e-book "How to Lose 120 Pounds in a Year Chanting Monty Python Quotes" unethical?

Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!

(Dropped another ounce there)

Edited October 21, 201312 yr by gmanbat

Depends on how you want to play it....

1) The combative method - walk into the directors' office and tell them, 'any more speculation in front of the whole office about my personal medical business and I'll have you before a tribunal quicker than your legs can carry you (not very good for the career prospects, but fundamentally, they are in the wrong on many levels.)

2) The jokey method - Say in front of all the staff 'Oh, yeah, about my surgery, I'd just like to announce that I'm having a brain transplant. Reason? The medical community cannot believe I actually work here!'. Any follow up, smile and say 'with the greatest of respect, it really is none of your business.'

3) Ignore them entirely. They'll get bored of the speculation eventually.

4) Ham it up. Wait until some bozo chooses an inopportune and public moment to make a direct enquiry - promptly run away crying. They'll be scared shiteless that they've said something terribly wrong and after initial attempts at saying 'there there', will leave it be and probably avoid enquiring again like the plague.

Best of luck!

Depends on how you want to play it.... 1) The combative method - walk into the directors' office and tell them' date=' 'any more speculation in front of the whole office about my personal medical business and I'll have you before a tribunal quicker than your legs can carry you (not very good for the career prospects, but fundamentally, they are in the wrong on many levels.) 2) The jokey method - Say in front of all the staff 'Oh, yeah, about my surgery, I'd just like to announce that I'm having a brain transplant. Reason? The medical community cannot believe I actually work here!'. Any follow up, smile and say 'with the greatest of respect, it really is none of your business.' 3) Ignore them entirely. They'll get bored of the speculation eventually. 4) Ham it up. Wait until some bozo chooses an inopportune and public moment to make a direct enquiry - promptly run away crying. They'll be scared shiteless that they've said something terribly wrong and after initial attempts at saying 'there there', will leave it be and probably avoid enquiring again like the plague. Best of luck! [/quote']

Madam, you ALWAYS MAKE ME LAUGH!!

You can only be hurt if you allow someone to get to you. We all know we are fat and we want not to be.........No mystery there. So preempt the insults by openly stating to any that should ask, how your are merely doing what you need to do to get healthy. If they persist, just add "At least there is something available to help me with my shortcomings, unlike you".

You can only be hurt if you allow someone to get to you. We all know we are fat and we want not to be.........No mystery there. So preempt the insults by openly stating to any that should ask, how your are merely doing what you need to do to get healthy. If they persist, just add "At least there is something available to help me with my shortcomings, unlike you".

Good point. Fat is easier by far to deal with than compacted bowels of compassion.

I told everyone. If they had issues, it was theirs not mine. My goal is to inform and educate about the surgery and the WLS community in general. There are so many lies and misconceptions out there - even among people that have had WLS! Although there is nothing wrong with not telling anyone, or even telling them it's none of their business, I think that lying about it outright can come back to haunt you. Just saying, "I'm having medical issues and need stomach surgery" should suffice in both what's going on and in why your losing weight (anyone that has had to have surgery on their stomach for any reason is going to lose weight as a side-effect).

Sounds to me, though, that the issue is the people you work with/for rather than the surgery!!

Good luck!