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Shrinking Violets -- April 07 Bandsters



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Jennifur--I would call the DD's BFF's Mom, and be very friendly and nice, and ask her if her DD had mentioned the shared party, and if she says no, tell her you are sorry, that you thought it had been discussed, so why doesn't she call you back after chatting with her DD. If she says yes it is ok with her, I'd say I was calling to get some things squared away, who was doing what, and laugh about being afraid you'd end up with 2 cakes, and no ice cream....or something. Then ask her if next Saturday would work to get together to work on the back yard, and pool area, so it will be ready. Not actually ask if she will help, ask if the day is ok, like you EXPECT her help! Tell he maybe the 2 of you can do the hedges, while the girls (plural---hers too) clean the lawn furniture---detail it enough so that she might realize how much work is involved. Then if no one wants to help--I'd call her back and ask if she was willing to help pay for a public location, since there was no way to get all the work done alone.

Wow Kat...what a diplomat!! This is fantastic advice re the party!!

How could that not yeild a positive result!!

TRACYINKS....FABULOUS that you had such a great time at the dreaded buffett...and as for the bridget jones knickers getting the heave ho...I am totally Excited for you!!

Terridoodle...look at you!!! You look Great!!

I had a strange day yesterday. I fixed Soup for dinner (minestrone) and couldn't face it so I changed to veg & couldn't stomach it either. Maybe 20 days of soup has turned my stomach? I ended up having custard for one meal & for the next I had porridge. (very milky)

BUT i think I understand now what a PB is? I could feel the porridge travelling back up my neck!!! LOL, guess it was a little premature for that kinda meal. Mushies are approaching though

Also, pain in my shoulder is back :cry ...what's that about?

Should I take that as normal or should I be worried that it may be something else ( paranoid !!)

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1-9-9

:thumbs_up::woot::thumbs_up::thumbs_up::woot::thumbs_up:

You are doing F A B U L O U S!!!!!!!!!!!!! I loved the pictures as well.

:Banane43:

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Wow...(((Jennifur.))) As for your sick friend who is turning the tables on you, what is it you are venting about? Could that be too much for her to deal with at the moment? You have been very good to her & she availed of your goodness, it may be too soon for her to reciprociate. She may sense from you that you resent her selfishness at the moment.

She is being selfish because she needs to be, it is a matter of survival instinct for her. You need to be selfish yourself and get back behind the driving seat of your own life before it gets the better of you.

Give her space & don't vent to her anymore. Let her heal. You are the friend she depended on & it may be distressing to her to see you unravel.

quote]

Well, here is the part that bothers me the most, I was venting that my daughter was doing all the work for the party and her daughter was not... see where I'm going with this/???

That was a wonderful post, you are always so full of positive wisdom. It is all true. I have been feeling so left out and I am dealing with so much. I am overwhelmed. I had a total meltdown yesterday - still have the same feelings but felt so much better after a good cry.

It still doesn't change things - the only good thing is that dbf has been working hard to try and get things back where they need to be and he was actually great last night helping me and talking to me

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Enjoy the post this am. Have to go to work now. Everyone have a good day. I haven't been able to change my ticker but I'm down to 232 today and I'm doing 1 hour a day on the treadmill. I went back to the fitness center at the hospital around the corner. Since I have 24/7 access it works for me. I just go when I feel like it, Ususlly after work before I go home. Once I make it home I don't want to go out again so this is very convienent.

Jennifur, I don't have children but I have a very non supportive husband that causes all kind of havoc in my life. I do understand STRESS. Just stop and breathe, breathe, breathe and tackle ONE necessary thing at a time. If you can't do anything about that one situation then drop it. You don't have to be superwoman. We both have the same personality when it comes to everyone else and I have learned to put me at the top. I felt selfish at first but now I feel so-ooo much better. I no longer have anxiety attacks that leave me on the floor several times a day. And haven't had one since December.

Hang in there and remember we are all here for YOU! Just as you have been for us.

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Hello,

I was also banded in April. April 9. I had some problems with my port incision, but I think it is finally healing. I would be honored to join such a great bunch of losers!

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Oh, I didn't realise the sick friend was the same girl's mother!!

That's a horse of a different colour!!

I still maintain that venting to this friend is a no no for now.

As for the party...well, would you consider that you've taken on too much? Can you scale it down a bit or enlist help from another grown up? and maybe another of DD's friends?

You're certainly dealing with a can of worms there.

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Hello,

I would be honored to join such a great bunch of losers!

LOL tekymom!!! Where else could you get away with saying that!! LOL...very good

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Jennifer

Thank you and it is so true. I have been so tapped financially that I have not been going to my head dr. I think I need to make an appt. We had come so far - but my issues with her were to work on me and my self confidence and me not being the care giver to everyone around me.

Everyone - please pray for me or send me good vibes, I interviewed at the perfect place the other day and should hear the beginning of this week, I don't want to work at home depot and I have a job there as a back up, and really want the job I went for at dbf's company - and no - he still doesn't know i was there

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WELCOME TO ONEderland TERRI!!!!:Banane43:

Denise I LOVE YOUR TICKER! I may copy it :thumbs_up:

Judy: I bet you have a visit from the WHOOOSH fairey soon and drop 5 lbs at once!:thumbs_up:

Kat: You are continually in my thoughts especially when I try on the clothes you sent me! I can now get those shorts on over my booty and button them.. (I am WAYYYY more hippy and thick in the legs than you were so the fact that I can now get them on is a real NSV!)

AnnieMac: I will get you added asap!

Morning Gr8!

It is raining cats and dog this morning which means that the boys will be at each others throats shortly..

yippeeee for me (not):thumbs_up:

I DID eat some junk yesterday, but not a lot and it was all soft! I had a new low so I'm relieved. I fixed scrambled eggs for Breakfast and for lunch will most likely be another 1/2 burger leftover from last night.........

I LOVE MY BAND! Even UNFILLED it is helping! Have a great day!

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I came home from my mom and dads house Wednesday, I was obviously weighing on her scale, I try to just weigh on Mondays, but I have weighed the past few days and my weight keeps going up. I am now up 5 pounds!!!!!! I know for a few days I sort of ate more, but I don't have anything really fattening here. I have really be watching it the past two days and when I stepped on the scale today I just about died!!!

Well tommorrow is a new day and a new weight that is official!!!

thanks for letting me vent!!

Jane

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Oh, I didn't realise the sick friend was the same girl's mother!!

That's a horse of a different colour!!

I still maintain that venting to this friend is a no no for now.

As for the party...well, would you consider that you've taken on too much? Can you scale it down a bit or enlist help from another grown up? and maybe another of DD's friends?

You're certainly dealing with a can of worms there.

Yes, and I was beingk kind when I vented, trying to take the nice way to say I thought she was going to help but was not going to force her dd to help. I can't do it all and I think that is what is frustrating to me. I have hard labor to do and I can't, and this is final week so I have to spend the day doing homework. Going to do it outside to get some fresh air.

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You guys are all wonderful and have such good ideas how to deal with this party situation. I'll keep you posted as we progress.

My mom is moving back here by the end of June, maybe I should just put the party off a couple weeks until she gets here

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Why don't you just do that Jennifur...You are not able for this party. It will lead to upset for you. Call it off, plan something smaller to mark the day.

I will wish for you that you get good news this week re the job situation..xx

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