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Keeping surgery a secret...?



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Well I opened my big mouth to one friend that I thought would understand. I got silence at first then she answered "hmmmm" to everything so I guess I should have kept my mouth shut. Anyway that was a learning experience, I'm not telling anyone until after the surgery. For crying out loud, it's nerve racking enough without having people relating horror stories to me.

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So far (surgery is 3 wks) I have told Mom,sis, BFF and husband. They are all very supportive. I telecommute so work has no idea. The others in my life that have to know I am having a surgery I will probably say "gallbladder". I have enough on my head and I just feel better this way for now. Who knows if that will change. I really believe that we only have to answer to ourselves.

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I'm almost 9 months post-op and about 90lbs down and my husband is still the only person to know. I only took 3 days off work and had an easy recovery. My weight loss has been at a rate that could be achieved in many ways...not just surgery. So there hasn't been any speculation - at least not to my face.

I'm a private person. I don't broadcast any of my personal medical information or procedures to people - elective or not.

Still very happy with my choice to keep my personal life personal.

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I'm a complete idiot. I told my younger sister (40 yrs old) that I am having it done and because I'm going to Mexico she had a fit. I wish I had just kept my mouth shut and left in 10 days without saying a word to anyone other than my adult son. So later today I will be at a family bbq and will have to tell my father and older sister (she is a nurse) because if I don't the younger sister will. Not that any of them will change my mind but I really dont want to hear it.

I spoke to my pcp on friday and he is on board with me going to Mexico. Very supportive. In fact he told me to stay away from anyone that was negative about my decision and to do what I knew was best for me. So that is eactly what I'm going to do. If the older sister and dad have a problem with it I will go home and call them when I get home on the 17th.

As far as friends and co-workers go...I've told several and most have been supportive. All are scared that I have chose to go alone but that is exactly how I want it.

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I'm a complete idiot. I told my younger sister (40 yrs old) that I am having it done and because I'm going to Mexico she had a fit. I wish I had just kept my mouth shut and left in 10 days without saying a word to anyone other than my adult son. So later today I will be at a family bbq and will have to tell my father and older sister (she is a nurse) because if I don't the younger sister will. Not that any of them will change my mind but I really dont want to hear it.

I spoke to my pcp on friday and he is on board with me going to Mexico. Very supportive. In fact he told me to stay away from anyone that was negative about my decision and to do what I knew was best for me. So that is eactly what I'm going to do. If the older sister and dad have a problem with it I will go home and call them when I get home on the 17th.

As far as friends and co-workers go...I've told several and most have been supportive. All are scared that I have chose to go alone but that is exactly how I want it.

I'm in the same boat! Have decided not to tell my family because they aren't supportive at all. Can't tell my supervisor at work because she's a blabber mouth. Just decided to keep my secret all to myself!

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I've been completely transparent about having WLS.

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It's my business and I do not feel that I want to share it with others. My husband is very supportive of my decision both to have the surgery and to keep it quiet.

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Only my emidiate family knows. I don't feel it's nessasary to share this with my coworkers. They'll just think I'm finally losing weight on one of the five million diets I've been on. I've seen how they gossip about the lady who clearly has plastic surgery... I prefer not to be the subject of gossip at work. My body...my business.

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    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
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    • BeanitoDiego

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    • BeanitoDiego

      Still purging all of the larger clothing. This morning, a shirt that I ADORED wearing ended up on top. Hard to let it go, but it was also hard to let go of those habits that also no longer serve my highest good. Onward and upward!
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