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No Friend Of Mine
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My son had gastric bypass a little over a year ago. He lives in another state. When I prepared for my sleeve he phoned me often to give me tips and bits of wisdom that came from his experience with life after WLS.. One of the main points he pressed was to get rid of my scale. Weighing only at Dr appointments was his advice. Little did he know that my scale obsession had already led me to purchase a professional Drs scale a few years earlier. The one with the sliding weights, not digital. It didn't come cheap. I bought it when I went on one of my larger attempts at weight loss, Atkins I think. I used it daily then until I was secure in the fact that yet another diet had failed, or guess to be honest I should say I had failed. After that the newest object of my affection became an object of contempt. I stopped standing on it and began giving it " the look" whenever I was forced to be in the room with it. I told my husband it was too large and in the way. I asked him to just throw it out. I won't bore you with his opinion of throwing out perfectly working and expensive items. Particuarly when he was armed with all of the reasons I had given him a year earlier of why we should buy it. Lets just say it remained in its place of honor. Instead he suggested choosing a monthly "Weigh Day" actually marking it on a calendar and weighing only then. In between weigh days my current weight would be a non issue. Easy enough. Sure, I can do that. It only takes a bit of self control. It's mind over matter thats all. Excuse me? Does he really know me so little?
Fast forward to today. I find myslf once again stepping on the steel monster 2 x every day. Every time I step away from it angry and usually feeling defeated. If it gives me anything it gives it in 1/2 lb increments. What did I realistically expect weighing so often, right? But realism has little to do with anything when it comes to my scale. Enough! It messes with my feelings. It makes me feel like a loser and not in the weight loss kind of way. It isn't good for me. It hurts me.
Today I will change. I cannot say I will go from one Dr appointment to the other or wait a month for weigh days but as of today I will commit to weighing 1 day per week. I know that I will be devestated if I stand still for 7 days but it is what it is. My son was right. The scale is not my friend. I cannot go back from my surgery. I have a small capacity for food and I always go for Protein first. I get as much protein in as I possibly can daily and sip flavored Water all day long. I walk as much as I can and I am trying to get more exercise each day than the day before. The weigh is coming off slowly for me but it will eventually come off. I see I will not have one of those amazing success stories. At 3 weeks I'm only down 11 lbs. from my day of surgery weight. With my slow rate loss my hopes for where I could be at 6 months are dashed. I have to give up that dream now and settle for 6 months being whatever it will be. Thats where I am today.