I thought it might be a good idea to have a thread where we could discuss the different challenges/issues we face as being single and banded.

I'll start with introducing myself. My name is Chris, I am 32 and live in a suburb of Boston. About a year ago I got out of a 5 year relationship and have just casually dated (online dating) since then. I have decided to take a break from dating for a bit, so I can focus on myself and adjust to living life as a bandster. (I was just banded on 10/2). One of my biggest concerns when I start dating again is if/when to tell that I am banded. It's not that I don't want to tell people, it's just that my idea of great dinner conversation does not include discussing my weight. Overall I would say that I have a great life. I have a good job, a very supportive family, and lots of friends. I am happy to be taking control over my weight and issues with food, and am excited at the prospect of my future as a not-so-fat woman.

I look forward to meeting more single bandsters and hope this thread takes off!

Chris :cocktail:

Hey everyone,

I haven't been on in a while. Nothing new to post in my life. I think as far as my weight loss journey goes, I've been discouraged and a "slow loser" the past few months. Since January, I've had 2 fills and still have only lost 10 lbs. I am scheduled to go back in mid june again. I have struggled with proper restriction.

But I'm not totally discouraged, tomorrow is my "bandiversary" and I have lost a total of 46 lbs my first year. On the whole, thats not too bad. Its just hard when I compare my self to my 2 girlfriends who are both also 12 months post and who have lost 123 and 97 lbs each. (we all started at about the same wt. )

And I AM thankful, considering that in the past 10 years, I had gained steadily every year. I just tell everyone..."i'm on the 3 year plan"....:cheeky :laugh :becky: .

sO ANY wAY..... just thought i'd give all my fellow single bandsters a shout out. Good luck and good journey.

Missy, I totally understand your feelings. It's so frustrating to see everyone else losing faster. It's such a fine line trying to find that restriction. I have been hungry all evening, yet I am really afraid to get another fill. I guess it's fear of the unknown. I am hungry, yet food gets stuck. How much more will it hurt if I get another fill is the question I keep asking myself.

Welcome Carol!! I hope you are very successful with your band. Tell us more about yourself!

Hi Denise. I'm 53 and have been a nurse for 34 yrs. I work in a hosp. I've met numerous associates that are banded. Our hospital was involved in the clinical trials for FDA approval for the lapband. I was impressed with everyone's weight loss and how 3 and 4 yrs later they are still doing great. Since I've been overweight most of my life, I thought this would be a great tool for me to use to keep it off.

I have three grandchildren, ages 4(girl) and 5 (girl&boy twins).

I've been divorced for 11 yrs this year and looking forward to finally beginning a new life with the band.

This week I've started the mushies. It's better that just liquids. I've lost 15 lbs that I know of.

Look forward to talking to you later

Carol

Carol, I hope you are more successful than I have been. I have only lost 32 lbs in 5 months.22 of it was the first 4 weeks while I was on a liquid diet. They told me it would be slower for me because I am 54, and because I didn't have as much to lose as some people. I felt I had plenty to lose. I am going to get my nerve up and get another fill at the beginning of June, I think.

Hey everyone

Just wanted to wish everyone a safe and good memorial day weekend..I am going up to lake george, NY with my sister and her BF..Hope i have fun being single and all ..Anyways, ttyl

~Kristen

Well I think with the band it is slower, but it does come off. It also takes a lot of work and effort, but in the end it will all be worth it no doubt.

So update on last night's date. I was sooo dreading going out. I was just tired and had no interest in going. I came close to canceling, but I went anyway. And you know what? It was probably the best first date I've been on. It was slow in the beginning, but after we warmed up a bit we had a great time. We laughed and seemed to have a lot in common. Over 3 hours flew by and neither of us noticed. That's always a good sign. On the drive home I chuckled about how surprised I was that I had such a good time. See...and I didn't want to go! So we'll see if there's a second date. I hope there is.

Kristi how are things with tattoo boy?

Wootsie, Karla, Efika, how are things with you ladies?

How about those gents out there. You guys have got to be facing some dating challenges too, no?

Don't get discouraged Denise.The bad thing is that our metabolism slows as we age. The other thing is the more weight you have to lose, the faster it comes off in the beginning. Please don't sell yourself short. You have a weight loss of 32 lbs and that's great. My doctor doesn't want me to lose it too fast. Here's hoping that you get the courage to get another adjustment.

Carol

Chrispy, you're advice is dead-on... you can't go in with any expectations. You just have to look at it as a "meeting" and see if you have anything in common.

Sounds like you had a really nice time the other day. Just goes to show you that all the anticipation doesn't get you anywhere, when people tend to over-analyze and have grandoise calculated plans. Since you were tired and almost canceled, it's almost as if all the pressure was off and you were able to just enjoy yourself.

Do tell... do you typically meet at a restaurant? or, do you have the date pick you up? Do you have dinner, go to a movie?

Today was the last day of school year for my 10 year old. So, now I can concentrate on doing some fun things for me this summer! I'm going on the LBT cruise on 6/17, my 1st!! My son is staying with my parents for the week, so I'm looking forward to a new adventure.

Everybody needs to check in and let us know what you've been up to?!

What are you're plans for Memorial Day? Sounds like Kristen is going to have a good time at Lake George! she's done an amazing job - down 117 lbs!!! wow

Karla

Carol - sorry, in my previous post I meant to say :welcomeB: !!!!!

It's great to have you at LBT and a part of our singles group! Congratulations on your surgery. How are you feeling at just over 2 weeks out? Everything healing fine? 15 lbs is GREAT! How much longer 'til you start solids?

What part of the country are you in? Any available men on your front, are you looking?

Sorry, I'm a bit nosy at times

Karla

Chrispy, is that the younger guy? I winked at someone on Match. It's pretty amazing that there are no guys in my age group on there that I am at all interested in. I don't want to date a smoker and that cuts a lot of them out.

The one I winked at lives 50 miles away. We'll see if anything comes of it. I doubt it but you never know.

I am going to call and see if I can get a fill next week. I am tired of being hungry.

Karla I will be really excited to hear about the LB cruise. I might want to try that sometime!

Hi all!

Denise, this is not the 29 year old, although the guy I met the other night is younger - 31. But he really seems to have his stuff together. He owns his own house, two cars, has a good job, and we just planned our second date which is at another very nice restaurant. He's not show-y though. Very down to earth, normal guy. The 29 year old, which I have dubbed my "Boy Toy" because he's hot lol, wants to go out this weekend. He's definitely only looking for one thing, which I won't give him, but I may go out again just to have some fun. We'll see. I'm actually quite excited about the new guy (I'll have to come up with a knickname for him lol) but I don't want to get my hopes up. Hopefully the second date is as good as the first.

Karla I usually meet them somewhere the first couple of times, and it's usually for dinner. I always suggest just meeting up for coffee or a drink, but the guys I meet ALL want to take me to dinner. It cracks me up. They have no idea if they'll even like me, but they want to buy me dinner?? I get a little uncomfortable if it's a nice place or an expensive meal. That's happened to me twice so far. My friends tell me to just go with it, but it blows my mind that a guy has no problem dropping $75+ on dinner when we haven't even spoken on the phone yet. lol But I also appreciate that these guys are trying to show me that they know how to treat a woman right so I am just trying to "go with it".

Oh by the way Karla - I'm so jealous about the LBT cruise. That will be a blast!

Soooo...those of you who've been reading right along with my saga will get a kick out of the fact that my tattoo boy instant messaged me last night. He saw a new pic I had posted on Match from a wedding I was in last weekend, and he wanted to "let me know" that I looked beautiful. Then he started on about how he really doesn't know why we broke up, and he's sorry blah, blah, blah. I told him not to be sorry, it is what it is, and I've moved on. Well now he's been text messaging me. Ugh. "I'm so sorry I messed things up with us" and "Thanks for letting me get things off my chest last night". I've just not been responding and hoping he'll just go away. Wish me luck! lol

That's funny Chrispy. He knows he lost a good thing. You need someone mature. Hopefully, you have found that in new man. I wouldn't worry about going out to dinner, as long as it's very public and they aren't expecting anything because they bought dinner.

The guy I winked at hid his email address in his match profile and I wrote him and he wrote back. We'll see what happens. I asked for a picture, and so did he. I told you how my luck runs with that.

I get a fill on 6-7. It's official- I can eat too much. I just got so sick of dieting and nothing happening, that I ate 3 pieces of pizza tonight. It got stuck at first, so I waited and then the rest of it went down without a problem. That's supposed to be a sign of the need for a fill.

I have had nothing but really bad relationships over the past 7 years. maybe guys think they can bully over weight girls. Anyways I have been singlw for a year now and I am glad that I am especially while I loose weight and find myself again.

4/2/07 340 -- 2 week liquid diet

4/17/07 320 surgery

4/25/07 310 1 week visit

5/24/07 300 5 week visit and 1cc fill in 10cc band

and now I lossing weight again

5/26/07 297 yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi everyone good idea for a thread. I haven't read all 30..... something pages! Wow! but have a read a few seems like not many of the guys participate is this a ladies only deal?

JC