Hello Everyone I am Fordguy8193

[fordguy8193 0]

Hello

I have been reading stuff on internet about weightloss. I am very interested in this lap-band surgery. But it is not cheap...I have alot of questions. I am 340 pounds 5'7''. 43 male. My knees have been hurting and hips too. I tried walking,riding bike...I work a physical job.. and when I lose weight I which takes along time..I gain it all back plus some...I was seeing a doctor who tried to help but it was hopeless. I need some serious help. I have a 3 year old daughter and need to keep up with her. I do not want her to be ashamed of her heavy father. This all makes me very sad. I work for one of the big 3 (not so big anymore) and have some coverage. what will OHIP cover when it comes to this type of procedure. I also have green shield through work. I am going to see my benefit rep and see what kinda coverage we have.

Well this could be the start of my journey and I will be glad to share it all with you. I was born in Windsor Ontario and I currently still live in the area. I started gaining wieght a few pounds a year since puberty. Being heavy is no fun. People would never call a person of colour or race any names but they sure like to pick on peeps who are heavy. It seems to be acceptable behaviour. With our population becoming heavier all the time it seems to be a growing problem.

I am no wimp I can stand up for myself..( I tell em I am big boned)..hehe but it gets to me sometimes. To be judged on how you look, it really sucks..anyhow thats it for my venting. anyone have some similar thoughts on the subject. I hope to here from some of you peeps that are on same page and have some info for me....have good day.

Fordguy8193

[*susan* 1,709]

Hi Fordguy, my hubby works for one of the other big threes, but I don't think that will preclude us from being friends. :faint:

First off, welcome to LBT! I am so glad you found us. You will find a ton of helpful information here on the lapband. Check out the stickies at the top of all the forums, as they offer a wealth of helpful information.

Unfortunately, my insurance did not cover the surgery. So, we refinanced the house so I could have it done. I can honestly say it is the best thing I have ever done for myself and would do it again in a heartbeat. I had tried every other diet on the planet it seemed, and nothing worked. However, the band works. And, I do not diet. I just listen to my band and when it tells me I am full, I quit eating. I do make a point of making healthier food choices, but I refuse to count calories, carbs, points or anything else ever again.

I know where you are coming from about people making fun of us. For some reason, it seems it is perfectly acceptable to ridicule people with weight problems. People don't understand how truly difficult it is and how much it hurts us. I do not have a very good relationship with my husbands grown children from his first marriage, and lately they seem to think it is funny to post "fat" comments about me all over the internet. I am just telling myself that if they are picking on me, then hopefully they are leaving someone else alone. But, it truly does hurt and I can't wait until the day when I am thin and they cannot hurt me with those comments anymore.

Anyways, best of luck in your research of the band. I hope your insurance will cover you. If you have any questions, ask away as we are all here to help.

[coleoptera 1]

Here is a letter I wrote to my health insurance to explain my situation. They told me that even though I was a perfect candidate for the lapband, they would not cover it. Nor would they cover ANY proceedure, medication, therapy, doctor's visit to discuss weightloss, gym membership. I borrowed the money and I had the band in July. At this time last year, I weighed 380. I now weigh 315!

Maybe this can help someone....

Obesity is affecting my life in the following ways:

Physically

Hypertension

My blood pressure continues to get higher and higher despite the use of medications. When I must walk any distance I can feel my pulse in my face.

sleep Apnea

I must now sleep with an ugly cumbersome breathing machine at night. I am afraid I will die in my sleep if I don’t use my CPAP.

Caught Variant Asthma

When I have an asthma attack, I cough because I can’t breathe. I cough so hard I turn purple, pee my pants and throw up…not nice anywhere, especially in front of a classroom full of elementary kids.

Foot and ankle pain

The pain in my feet and ankles is so severe, that at night I must elevate and ice them just to be able to walk around the house. I have spurs on many of my foot bones because I have carried around so much weight for so long.

Chaffing

My thighs rub together. My arms rub my sides. My fat folds rub each other and the tops of my legs. It is miserable! Even though I wash, medicate, powder, use antiperspirant under my belly fat and in the creases and wear absorbing cotton clothing, I STILL rub, sweat, chafe, hurt, and break out in nasty folliculitis.

Walking

My thighs are so fat; my legs are forced to spread, causing my gait to be too wide. This makes my hips and lower back hurt. I walk like an old fat cowboy duck. Just watch me next time I come into the room. I can’t walk more than a block without pain in my back, hips, feet and ankles. I am out of breath after the first 100 yards. My ankles and feet hurt so badly all day.

Stairs? Ha. Going up is actually better than going down. I may be slow ascending stairs and need breaks within a single flight, but descending, well I can’t see my feet to see the next step below me. Each step down jars my huge frame. It is easier if I turn to the side, hold on to the rail and use a side step, using the same foot to lead on each step. I prefer elevators or escalators even if I am going down one flight.

Sweating

Have you ever been so winded and worn out after taking a trip through Wal-Mart that the sweat rolls down your back and into your butt crack? No? Try being me for a day.

Getting Up

I have a hard time getting in and up out of cars, chairs, the floor and bed.

Fitting

I need chairs without arms. Do you know how many chairs have arms? All movie theatres, all theatrical venues, all stadiums, all beauty shops, dentist chairs, office chairs, lawn chairs, waiting rooms, airplanes, trains, and most restaurants (I’m sorry ma’am we only have chairs with arms, do you think you could fit in a booth? HA!)

I don’t fit in many cars, non handicapped bathroom stalls, dressing rooms, bathtubs, the spaces between clothing racks at stores, and turnstiles.

Bathrooming

First I must see if I have enough room to spread my leg wide enough to wipe, then I check the sturdiness of the toilet. I have been on a toilet in the midst of a very delicate maneuver when the toilet has come loose from the floor and made a horrible mess. It is a very embarrassing thing to have to tell your hostess that you broke her toilet and ruined the bathroom rugs.

Once all seems to be fit, I do my business and then attempt to lean forward with one arm tucked under my belly. I must balance all of me onto my tip toes and reach through the front. This acrobatic feat is difficult.

I do not fit in regular sized bathtubs. If I must bathe, I force my hips into the tub. I had to install a shower wand to clean my self properly while showering. I use hibiclense and other antimicrobial soaps and solutions to reduce the risk of folliculitis, and faruncles. I shower every morning and every evening to keep my fat folds clean and my body smelling nice.

Clothing

This is a big issue with me. I must be very careful in clothing I select as not to bring attention to my self. One day I bought a very expensive, very cute chartreuse short set. I wore it to the store and I had a very rude person look directly at me and mimic my walk and say, “Look, at me…I am a big, fat lime!”

Super sized clothing is hard to find. Once you do find it, it is very expensive. I spend a lot of time, effort and money covering my body in a tasteful way.

I must be very careful in selecting clothing. I cannot fit in any clothes from regular plus sized shops. I surpassed the sizes at Lane Bryant 5 years ago. I am now wearing the largest size at the only two mail order clothiers available. I will have to resort to having “tents” made for me if I don’t loose weight.

Sex

Sex is very difficult because of my large stomach and large backside. This is a very difficult topic to discuss, and an even more difficult topic to endure. My sex life is not what I want it to be because my fat makes sex very difficult. I also feel very self conscious about my body.

Mentally

Embarrassment

I do not like the way I look. I feel embarrassed about how I look to other people. I feel that my fat makes me ugly and undesirable. It is embarrassing to not fit in a $120.00 Chicago theatre seat and have to ask the manager if there is any where else he could seat me. I am embarrassed when am winded from taking my students out to recess. I am embarrassed when I must lift my fat belly up over a turnstile to fit through it.

Compensating

I feel I must be better, smarter, funnier, cleverer, and more charming because I am fat. I have developed quite a sense of humor to mask my hurt at being left out of many things over the course of growing up. Sarcasm is one of my compensating tools.

Sadness- I cry often because I am overwhelmed about my weight. It make s me feel so sad to think about all of the things I miss out on because I am fat. I hate myself for getting so fat and out of control. I am angry at myself for not being able to stick to an eating plan and exercise regime.

Fear

I do not want to develop heart problems because of my obesity. I fear going to the doctor each time, because I am expecting to hear the words “heart disease.” My blood pressure scares me. Anxiety then takes over and I feel overwhelmed with guilt and fear.

Self Consciousness

I cover my body with big baggy clothes. I cover my belly with a pillow to “hide” my fat when I am sitting on a couch.

I am always very aware of how other people are looking at me, and the remarks they make. This horrible habit puts a strain on my marriage.

Self Worth

My self worth is in the toilet. I feel disgusting. I hate being fat and I hate not being able to control my food intake. I feel bad about not being able to lose weight. I feel like a failure because I am not able to stick to a successful diet or long range exercise program.

These and many more mental obstacles must be overcome daily, even hourly. It is emotionally draining to have to prepare my self mentally for a day, not to mention the actually endurance of the emotions through the day. I am tired and disgusted with being so emotionally tied to this weight.

Socially

As a child I was ridiculed and left out of peer activities. In middle school I had a handful of friends, but the fat jokes and ridicule over shadowed me and made me feel worthless, ugly and unwanted. There was a rumor that followed me through all of 6th, 7th and 8th grades about me looking pregnant and every week it the big joke was to ask me whose baby it was. Ha! So funny! A three year “gestation period” was more than I could endure. I sought help from the school counselors. They told me if I lost weight they would stop bothering me.

High school was miserable. I was never asked on a date, never held a boy’s hand. I was always overlooked.

College was no different. Either were my 20s. No boyfriends, no dates, nothing…and I DID try. I tried 2 dating services; I spent 3 years in a huge singles group at my church.

While my girlfriends were on dates and getting engaged, I was alone and depressed. I finally put a personal ad on yahoo. I did find a loving man who I fell in love with and married. I love my husband, but I wish I didn’t have the lonely rejection filled past.

There are many social opportunities that I must turn down because of my morbid obesity. Camping, swimming, hiking and traveling are too difficult at my size. When a friend asks me to go out, I must consider all of the possibilities (Will there be room for me, is the restroom big enough, is her car big enough, will the chair support me even if I do fit?) There worries are enough to make me want to stay at home, and often times, I do because of worry and shame.

Financially

It is expensive to be fat and even more expensive to yo-yo diet. I have done both since I was 16. Specialty clothing costs twice as much as other clothes. My medical needs are very costly, even with health insurance. I spend lots of money on my favorite hobbies, eating and cooking.

I need help. I want to be successful in losing weight. I am ready. I want to be able to walk with our pain. I want to be alive for another 35 years, at least! Please help me by considering me for weight loss surgery.

[swirligirl 0]

Hi all,

I am back after a long break from LBT. I am 30, live in MA and had my band surgery in January. I am currently down 90lbs, and still chugging along.

[ralheit 0]

Hi Fordguy, welcome. Good luck with your check into insurance. I was one of the lucky ones, my insurance covered everything. But if you need some creative ways to finance, this is the place to search. So many committed people have found ways to make this happen for them.

I agree, obesity is the last acceptable discrimination in America. It's OK to call names, discriminate in hiring, etc. because of the way someone looks. I once lost a lot of weight and it was amazing the way people changed how they treated me. But like you, everytime I lost weight, I gained it and more back. That's why I chose the band.

Best of luck to you.

[djmath 0]

FordGuy...

I wish you the best of luck with your insurance too...and as said above if it does not cover, this is a good site to find other ways to finance it...

you sound like you are ready to do this..I think that is where a person has to get in life to have this done, I have been heavy all my life and struggled all my life trying all different things..and it was a yo yo....and people do treat you different when you are thin...I hate that....but for now in my life it is more about health..I want to be able to see my grandchilden grown and enjoy the last half of my life thinner and healthier...than my first half....

I wish you the best of luck in your new journey!!! keep us posted...

Jenny.....