I feel like a big baby but I'm afraid to tell my mommy. I am totally into getting sleeved but I'm afraid that she is going to be dissapointed and/or try and talk me out of it. She has weight problems too and doesn't want to consider surgery. She won't even look into getting her knees done. I am 39 years old and I want to be able to go outside and play with my kids and fit on the roller coasters next summer. Should I tell her now or wait till afterward? She knows how to lay on a mean guilt trip. My sister is having some other medical issues and she won't tell our mother either and I know my mom is hurt by this. Any advice would be appreciated.

That is just awful! I'm so sorry you're family talks to you this way. You CAN finish this! Keep your eye on the prize and disregard their petty comments.

Thank u Frza! I am 3 days into my pre-op now, an I admitt I am starting to struggle, but I won't give in!! Thank u for your support!

I was also afraid to tell my mom. When I did, her response was, "Good for you. I just hope you aren't getting the band". LOL I was shocked at the response!

My mom passed away years ago, but I know she struggled with the weight just as I am. I like to think she is up there supporting me through this. Now my stepdad doesn't really know much about it, so he's like be happy, but be careful. But my in-laws would freak! Will freak! I will tell them once I have a date. But in the end I'm still a rebel and will do what I want- so they can/will be upset but I can hear it now- 6-7 months from now the tune will change when they see the weight come off and a happier/healthier me. So worth it!

I was worried about telling my parents but when I told my mom she said, "Great! I'm not worried about you but I AM envious!!!"

I'm terrified to tell my mother in law. She is very holistic and would strongly disagree with me on this. She won't change my mind I just dot want there to e fissure in our relationship. ( i love my mother in law)

Sent from my iPhone using VST

So I finally told my sister and she is behind me which was a huge relief! Now onto mom. Will probably make a special trip out to see her o tell her. Hate to tell her over he phone. It will only be one week before the surgery but that's the only time I have. My sister recently had some medical problems and was very secretive around my mom about it. Not exactly sure why but that's her business. But moms hurt over this and my waiting so long I think will just compound the problem. I wish she would realize we are both adults, both in our thirties. I really think that she raised us to be so independent, it's backfiring on her! Sheesh, my other sister lives in New Zealand so she know next to nothing about what's going on in her life. Sorry, starting to ramble. Just very nervous about telling her but I feel I need to. Maybe she will surprise me and offer to come out and help with the kids. Will keep everybody posted.

So I finally told my sister and she is behind me which was a huge relief! Now onto mom. Will probably make a special trip out to see her o tell her. Hate to tell her over he phone. It will only be one week before the surgery but that's the only time I have. My sister recently had some medical problems and was very secretive around my mom about it. Not exactly sure why but that's her business. But moms hurt over this and my waiting so long I think will just compound the problem. I wish she would realize we are both adults, both in our thirties. I really think that she raised us to be so independent, it's backfiring on her! Sheesh, my other sister lives in New Zealand so she know next to nothing about what's going on in her life. Sorry, starting to ramble. Just very nervous about telling her but I feel I need to. Maybe she will surprise me and offer to come out and help with the kids. Will keep everybody posted.

Great! Best wishes to you.

I finally told my mother today and my surgery is Tuesday! She took it a lot better than I expected. She tried to talk me into he band instead (like I could show up at he hospital and say, by the way, I want to be banded instead!) long start short, she doesn't want me to get it done but she understands why I want to do it. So relieved!

I was afraid to tell anyone, too. I wrote a long, detailed email and sent it to all of my family members at the same time. I'm happy to report that I received the most loving encouragement and support from each and every one of them! It still brings tears to my eyes to think of all the wonderful things they said to me about making such a courageous and positive decision. However, I haven't been as open with everyone in my life. There are some people I suspect would be negative. I read posts about folks getting the "OH - well, my friend/family member/neighbor/whatever did it the HARD way by eating less and exercising - they didn't cheat" comments and I really don't know what I'd do if that happened. I'm so happy for you, Barisaxlady, for the great response you got from your sis and mom! Best wishes for Tuesday and your new life!!!

Reading these comments makes me sad! My parents are so excited for me! And my teenage daughters are excited for me as well!! I have told my co-workers and haven't had any negative reactions. Had a few kinda look at me funny but didn't say anything!! My in-laws have been told I'm going in for a hiatal hernia repair (which is really happening when I get sleeved) they would not understand and would get confused so my husband just thought that was easier! I think you just have to do what's right for you. Maybe tell her that its your life you love her and want her support but you don't need negative opinions!! Good luck!

I was afraid to tell my father, but he was really supportive. Maybe too supportive...

I was afraid to tell my father' date=' but he was really supportive. Maybe too supportive...[/quote']

I hear you, my husband said Yes a little too quickly when I told him I was considering it too!

To both above maybe the just really wanted you happy?? And they knew it would aid in that??

Sent from my iPhone using VST

To both above maybe the just really wanted you happy?? And they knew it would aid in that??

Sent from my iPhone using VST

Nah, He just wants me to get back into my "cute ass" jeans as He calls them! Lol

my family is very supportive and i yes i was scared to tell my family for the fact you never know what there going to say because it is a major surgery and they worry but when in realty when they have watched me struggle for years with my weight and health and when i had the band they watched me succeed with it and then after i had it took out for a major slip and i tell them after putting almost 20 lbs back on and telling them i dont want to go back to the old 441 lb person i once was they understand ! But i understand where you guys are coming from if they arent supportive i would be scared completely out of my mind