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Five Years Post Op N Gaining Weight



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Hello all, I am NOLA Lady. I am 4'10" n on the day of my surgery I weighed in at a whopping 230lbs and was in a size 18/20. I was extremely regimented, listened to every instruction and was ahead of my group in weight loss because of it. In six months I lost 100 lbs and went down to a size 2. I was so excited that I could finally shop at Victorias Secret & Cache that I became a clothes horse. I have a closet full if fine clothing. I am in sales n marketing and my career took off with the weight loss. I quickly rose to the #1 sales rep as I am a petite blonde in a male dominant field. I have kept the weight off for four years effortlessly and have stayed in my size 2. I went through a really rough time on my job at Airgas. The men hated me because sales came effortlessly to me because if the way I looked. Not once did I dress in appropriately with low cut shirts and or mini skirts. I was always professional in a business suit or when at a refinery or chemical plant I was in jeans n Airgas shirt and steel toe shoes nothing attractive about it. I went through an extremely stressful time and was forced out by men who could not handle being beat by a woman. They lied on me made up rumors and heck one guy went as far to not give me any accts out his branch for 5 years. When I confronted him two days later he gave me a new acct Southern Comfort Strip Club said I could sell them beer gas! Text book sexual harassment case that any attorney would have had a field day with. I did not pursue I found another job n moved on. However the stress I endured was overwhelming to say the least. I was forced to leave a job I loved was passionate about successful n the best of the best. Well I am a stress eater n a eater of the wrong things chocolate chocolate n more chocolate. I put on 25 lbs in one year and went up to a size 12. I am sick to my stomach about it. I so want to get back on track yet I am now overwhelmed with depression. Between being forced out a career I loved n enjoyed so very much and now the weight gain after spending $15k out my own pocket for the VSG surgery I am so depressed about things. I keep trying to drink my 42 gram Myoplex every day n take my Vitamins yet I am so down n out n overwhelmed with depression that I feel immobile n unmotivated. I feel like I am sinking into a black hole n can't stop myself from swirling down into the quick sand. Please help!! Does anyone have any advise or words of wisdom for me??? Toolgirl16@gmail.com

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I'm so so sorry about that happened to you...have you looked into seeking a counselor or therapist? They help you put things into perspective and on the right track...

I have one and she had done wonders in helping me....

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The key word here is depression. Please see a doctor and therapist about your depression. I know how it can feel like an identity crisis when you are no longer able to do the job you once felt defined you. But a job is not who you are. The circumstances suck, but the situation is not about you, it is about male insecurity. You need to take care of YOU, and move forward.

I've read about a five day pouch test, and yogurt day... to kind of cleanse your sleeve, so to speak, and kick the carb addiction, so that you can return to the way you were eating when you lost your weight in the beginning. Lots of Water and Protein first, then veggies, then fruit. You can do this! You already have. You are stronger than you think you are, and that was not the last job you will have and love. You will find a new place to shine. Just remember who you are, put on your warrior outfit, and get back out there!

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Well first of all, congrats on being sleeved 5 years, that makes you a VET around here! And congrats for losing the weight AND keeping it off. As we all know the losing part isn't the hardest battle, it's the keeping it off that is ever-elusive.

Since you were able to not only lose the weight AND keep it off for a number of years, I'm guessing that this job situation has basically chipped away at you emotionally and you are turning to food. We all know that there is an easy way to defeat our tools, eating the wrong kind of food, grazing, not exercising, etc. And sadly once you are about a year post-op the harder it is to lose the weight. We almost become "normal" in the sense that to take weight off we have to be super-strict about calories, exercise, etc. in order to drop the weight.

But as I always say one of the many things that helped me decide that this surgery was for me, was the fact that this is permanent. We get this tool forever. But we also have to use it wisely.

I wish I had better advice for you, but honestly I think you are just going to have to go back to basics. Have a big pity party for yourself, and then pick yourself up by the bootstraps and start over again. You may want to consider counseling, so that you aren't using food to comfort yourself. Hard stuff for sure. But you either make peace with where you are or you start fighting to get where you want to be. None of it is easy, but you can do it. Good luck!

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I am a Marriage and Family therapist and I highly recommend some therapy. Also, in addition, I highly recommend getting some medical help for the chemical inbalance. This is a time to refocus your attention to eating mindfully and keeping all the chocolates out of your mouth. Go back to basics.

The BASICS BOOTCAMP: By LilMissDiva (Irene)

For 5 STRICT DAYS I will eat only...

Proteins: Seafoods, Poultry and eggs, Dairies, nuts/seeds including Peanut Butter.

Veggies: Green only.

Fruits: None.

Breads/Cereals/Other Carbs: None.

Fluids: One gallon of Water (128 oz.) or Protein drinks.

Avoid: Sugar and Sodium

Once the 5 days are over, I am pretty much over the Sugar Carb Demon. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate carbs! I do need them to live a healthy life and since I workout a lot it is important I have them. However, I need GOOD carbs. Whole grains, fruits, veggies... But I don't need processed sugars. White carbs, in cereals, breads, rice... etc.

This plan will help get you back on track. It has worked for numerous people. :)

Those people that miss treated you and caused you all this trauma are not worth the ground they walk on. You deserve to get back to a size 2 and rock that world of yours again. You are doing awesome by seeking help. But please get some therapy to help get past your trauma so that it doesn't traumatize you any more. Get your personal power back. :)

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I wish I had better advice for you, but honestly I think you are just going to have to go back to basics. Have a big pity party for yourself, and then pick yourself up by the bootstraps and start over again. You may want to consider counseling, so that you aren't using food to comfort yourself. Hard stuff for sure. But you either make peace with where you are or you start fighting to get where you want to be. None of it is easy, but you can do it. Good luck!

M2G i couldn't have said that any better!! that's how you know this site is full of caring people(for the most part)...the "tough love" around here is awesome and just the kick in the pants some of us need!!

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Does your surgeon have any continuing support groups or followups for past patients? This is going to require you to dig down into the pit of your stomach and remember WHY you wanted the surgery, HOW you felt about your body and your life beforehand, and just...get back to that place where you decided you had to put your health first. Get there, and start over. Like everyone has said...back to the basics.

Get on MFP (MY FITNESS PAL) and become accountable to the people on there for what you are eating and what exercise you are doing. Many many people here on VST are on MFP, and would be glad to cheer you on and encourage you. You can do this. Get there. Do it. We got your back.

(btw, I'm dooter69 on MFP) Plan your life around your exercise schedule. That is a vital element people relegate to the back seat of their lives. Needs to be front and center.

YOU CAN DO IT!!!!

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I am so sorry to hear you have had such a negative experience with your weight loss. I agree that counseling is going to be your best advice. Take control of yourself and get back on track. The new person you have become is not going to let you down. Do not let your weight get out of control. We all know how hard it is to get it off. Br proud of who you are and find your sense of self and strength. Good luck to you!

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My gynecological oncologist, who absolutely believes in the sleeve, told me to not be afraid of taking an anti-depressant if I needed it during my weight loss. "weight" increases our estrogen production and part of what you are dealing with *may* be hormone related. It is a vicious cycle we can get into. Excess weight=excess estrogen=hormonal imbalance=omg i just want to eat till i die. You have your sleeve as a tool, now get a tool to help your mind. Therapy or meds if you need them for awhile. I bet once you get those excess pounds back off your mind crud will clear up... And, YOU CAN DO IT! YOU ARE WORTH IT! YOU DESERVE THE BEST! Claim what is yours!

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So sorry to hear that! I'm so pissed off that such stuff is happening even at this day and age!

BUT - you've successfully maintained your weight for years now. I'm sure you would have overcome hell lot of temptation for food. I know that emotional eating cant be stopped overnight. But if you had successfully stayed away from chocolates and other 'risky' food for 4 years, I'm sure you can do it now. Like others said, try some therapy and get back on track. Those losers are not worth s#$t. Dont let them win now. We're all behind you a 100%. All the best!!

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We are all behind you. Tie a knot look up put your best party dress on and start climbing back up.!

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So sorry you are going through this! I am an emotional eater in recovery. I too suffer from depression. Medication helps with the depression, and being nearly four months post op has given me time to build new habits. Just as you've done before. What I understand now about emotional eating is that I couldn't eat enough to feel better, even with my full stomach! It was never enough. You can do this! See a doctor and a therapist. We are here for you :)

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I agree with the ladies here,the first step is seek for a counselor ,second step is believe in yourself, you can do this,start today, we will be here for you.

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Yes, little miss divas 5 day boot camp and my fitness pal steffo_2002) are the two best things for you. If you can I would either talk to a therapist or take a mini getaway to help you refocus regroup and feel better. I wish you the best and hope you find your way soon, please remember we are all rooting for you.

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Therapy! Therapy! Therapy! Get some nutrition and psych therapy! Asking and getting help shows strength. You can't do it on your own, you just can't.

Also...Take up yoga and meditation. Find your core and your strength. Get out there and work out, every day! Get your frustrations out - take a boxing or kick boxing class. It works!

Secondly..., MOVE ON! Don't dwell on the past. You didn't take action on the harassment then, let it go! Sadly schmucks like you've encountered get away with that crap all the time. I know it is a huge battle to fight, but...at this point you have to let it go and move on for your personal well being. Don't let crap like that hold you down or back.

You've accomplished soooo very much! Get rid of the negative and focus on the positive and how strong you are! You are so very worth it to the be the best you can be. Concentrate and put your energy to YOU.

One Love.

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. summerseeker

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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