Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Are There Any Single Sleevers Out There..



Recommended Posts

Exactly. My lament used to be "I wish people would focus on my dolphin-like personality rather than my whale-like physique".

Bwahahaha! Awesome!

I went to a guy's place last night and because we are both Protein junkies, we boiled some eggs and had them with some cheddar for our late night snack....he was gonna boil like a dozen for both of us, I said it was gonna be too much. I ate two eggs and he kept telling me to eat more, and was flabbergasted when I said I was full. "Full already?!" I just laughed it off. If this were in a restaurant setting and I got a massive steak or something, it would've been more challenging.

Oh yeah, and then later he told me my abs made him feel embarrassed about his, whereas before seeing mine he considered himself to be in pretty good shape, haha.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

At one point I had the same mindset. But when I step back and take a look objectively, it's not just about what a person looks like, it's what they can do. I, for example, had pretty much turned myself into a prisoner. At 465 lbs I couldn't go to concerts because I didn't fit the seats. I couldn't go to sporting events because it was too painful to walk from the parking lot to the venue, and if I did make it, I was sweating so that I would soak through anything I wore. Now that I am slimmer and on my way to being fit, I do not want to spend my time with someone that was in the same place I was... I would much rather focus on someone that can help me continue my journey to being physically fit and living my life the way I should have been for the last 20 years. Maybe it's selfish, but I know where I was and what I couldn't do... Now that I can, I want someone that can live life with me.

I feel that way, too....I never really got so big that I was noticeably handicapped, but I certainly lead a different lifestyle now. My sleeve resulted in many more changes than simply reducing my portion sizes. I work out way more - even though I was an exerciser pre-sleeve! - I'm more active on a day-to-day basis, and date ideas such as playing badminton or renting bikes together sound way more fun now than they did 2 years ago, I'm a lot more health-conscious, so it feels more organic for me to date someone who won't be pushing me to drink alcohol or split Desserts with him at every meal.....one of the reasons I dumped my ex was because he just spent all his time off lying on the couch with his comic books and complaining about how bored he was, yet never offering any ideas for what to do together and refusing all of my suggestions. All he wanted to do was just lie around and eat crap. I used to be like that, too, but happily, I've left that in the past.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I got a book on Ebay that was for therapists with WLS patients. It said that, with relationships and marriages where the partner was heavy at the beginning of the relationship, there was an 80-85% chance that the relationship would dissolve after the weight loss that came after surgery. Hmmmm...makes you wonder, huh?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am single and have pretty much been single my whole life except when I had my daughter' date=' couldn't do that alone lol. I found it hard to let someone else like me if I didn't like me so I pretty much stayed the "friend". Hopefully as I lose weight I will begin to like myself and allow someone else to like me or maybe love me. I was just sleeved on Mar 19 so a long way to go yet.

Alana[/quote']

Hi alana ur my sleeve sis lol also sleeved mar 19th

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I feel that way, too....I never really got so big that I was noticeably handicapped, but I certainly lead a different lifestyle now. My sleeve resulted in many more changes than simply reducing my portion sizes. I work out way more - even though I was an exerciser pre-sleeve! - I'm more active on a day-to-day basis, and date ideas such as playing badminton or renting bikes together sound way more fun now than they did 2 years ago, I'm a lot more health-conscious, so it feels more organic for me to date someone who won't be pushing me to drink alcohol or split desserts with him at every meal.....one of the reasons I dumped my ex was because he just spent all his time off lying on the couch with his comic books and complaining about how bored he was, yet never offering any ideas for what to do together and refusing all of my suggestions. All he wanted to do was just lie around and eat crap. I used to be like that, too, but happily, I've left that in the past.

Sounds like you're in a much better place now, and that's what I'm looking forward to. Growing up I was extremely athletic, and played baseball, tennis, racquetball, swam on a swim team, wrestled and played football. The last 15 or 20 years I gave all that up inch by inch, pound by pound and I'm just not willing to do that anymore. I'm committed to getting back to that life, and if it means being alone till I can find the perfect fit, well that's just what it means.

BTW, you do have impressive abs :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was sleeved May 24th. I'm a single female. I live 20minutes of downtown Houston. Would love some companionship especially with someone who can identify with having wls.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Single, and decided to pop my head in. Not looking for love, any time soon. Been single for some time. I have decided to keep it that way, especially with school coming up. See ya guys.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have a new boyfriend! I hadn't planned on dating, but decided to work on myself and focus on my weight loss instead, then bam I meet this amazing man. I avoided eating our first few dates. Then I told him of my surgery a few weeks into dating. He said he knew it was odd I wouldn't eat in front of him. Now he has been very supportive. He knows I need to stop drinking half hour before and must wait an hour after, he knows I must eat slowly, and that I get in pain if I eat too much. Hopefully, everything continues to go well.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Single lady here! Single mom and have been for 10 years now! It's time to get healthy for my self and daughter, and then hopefully find the love of my life! I am 30 days post op

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

We had a singles forum going on here at one time. I wonder what happened to it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Single mother here! This should be interesting but I'm gamed haven't been sleeved yet but working on it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Single, sleeved May 15th! Where do you go to meet men? I am 49 and hardly one to go to clubs bars etc...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm single and sleeved, not easy. Single not by choice, lost my fiance last year to cancer. Not really doing the dating thing yet, but maybe soon???? It would be nice to have people to talk to see how we all handle different situations in the single life!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Just dropping in to say hi. Hi! And may we all turn heads! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I just turned 30 a couple weeks ago. I've always been single. I live in Buffalo Ny and I'm pretty sure only douches live here. Lol. But while I did this to save my life, hey, I'll take a dude too. The last few days as I think about things I think wouldn't it be neat to meet someone that has had the same surgery as me. But I would like to find love and have a family. But I have a long way to go before and guys will be interested in me.

Any Buffalo guys here. LOL!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 1 reply
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×